What would another United States Civil War look like?

I think that the split would be over different reasons than political party (or politics would only be a small part of it). We have so many other things to fight about in this country. However, I don’t think it will ever happen again.

The thought of Nader getting all serious about it with his little army makes me giggle though.

I see Sarah Palin on a dog sled and Rush Limbaugh on wings of righteous fire leading the army of the “Real Americans” against the rest of us (unreal?) Americans. (But I don’t think it will really come to that.)

It would start with SC seceding, just because we always do stuff like that.

(Parts of York, Co SC wanted to secede to a neighboring county back in the 90’s over a zoning ordinance. I tried to Google the reference, but it was lost in the historical noise).

The Libertarians would win because they would have all the guns and ammo.

First I don’t think a civil war will take place again in U.S,but if you go over this I think religious cause is more plausible and the arms of the two parts won’t be very advanced because religious people are very protective so they will use old fashion guns and strategies too.So in conclusion a civil war is very unlikely and if will still begin it will be very short

i think it would be between those that love Neil Diamond and those that don’t.

Who would win? Neil Diamond.

Here’s what will happen. The current trend is for the population of the center of the country to move towards the coasts. Gradually, the power of the inner states, as far as in the Senate and in the electoral college will be concentrated in the hands of people who represent far fewer people.

This power will help them block the political efforts of the vast majority of people, unless they can extract payments in return, such as greater farm subsidies, or higher prices for natural resources.

Eventually, the populace coastal areas will get tired of this. They will try to get a constitutional amendment to change the Senate and Electoral College to proportional representation. They will never get the majority needed to put the amendment to the states, and even if they did, they would never get the super majority needed in the states to make the change. So the less populace states would keep their power.

Finally, the coastal areas would get sick of this, and they would place an embargo on the inner states. The inner states would get supplies from Canada and Mexico, so the coastal areas would have a problem. On some pretext, perhaps evading the embargo, the coastal states would attack the border regions of Mexico, and take it over. Then, Canada would get the message, and close the Northern border.

Things would be tense for a while, and then the central states would start sending suicide bombers into the major urban areas of the coastal states. The coastal states wouldn’t stand for this, and they would attack, using the armed services. As this happens, the armed services will split with the central states servicemen defecting (and taking hardware with them) to the central states. Because the central states provide vastly more servicement than the coastal states, the central states would have a much stronger military power, but the coastal states have the people and the industrial capacity. Eventually, they will win, subduing the central states, making membership in fundamentalist Christian Churches a crime, and imposing atheism everywhere.

The underground Christians would continue to organize and terrorize the coastal populations with suicide bombs, but things would settle into an uneasy detente, until people erupted again, this time, ironically, with the “freedom fighters” of the central states allied with Mexico and the central American states, and thus would ensue the next world war.

Cool, huh?

It would be a fucking mess, is what it would be.

@Daloon (who I realize was probably joking) As much as I would like atheism as a state religion just kidding…sort of only 3–9% of the U.S. population is atheist/ agnostic (as of 2005: link ), so So when an influx from the central states makes the coastal states more representative of the general population, there is no way the atheist lobby would have control.

The small proportion of atheists in the population would also discourage any religious war; religion is in power now, and there is no indication its going anywhere, so its up to the atheists to instigate conflict. And our firepower is rather underwhelming.

@Jayne: There’s not going to be a civil war, either. I’m sure you’re right, but I get to play with what-ifs, or what’s the point?

@daloon Does your scenario take into account that middle America would control the food?

@Grisson: The embargo would shut the coasts off from wheat and corn supplies, but not necessarily from many other things. I don’t know what the reserves in these crops is, but I imagine it’s long enough to survive the embargo time. In any case, the coasts can get a lot of imported food, which will not be possible for the central states. So I don’t think that is a big problem for the scenario.

Why do you ask?

@daloon And the central states would have the gulf for importing and exporting.

@Darwin—most of the Right is also big on weaps, always has been.

To answer this question, I think it would be all the states against Washington D.C., while Congress was in session. It would not be pretty and it would not last long: Everybody would send in their 1014s with “I ain’t paying you to fuck me!” scrawled across it, and truckers would blockade the Beltway. No new truffles and veal, no martini lunches, no dry-cleaning solution… smelly Armani and Carolina Herrera.

Lobbyists would be paintballed DayGlo orange, for better target visibility.

Congresspersons would be unable to pay their bodyguards, who would quit and go work for Rosie O’Donnell. And every single one of those asses on Capitol Hill would be forced to actually learn the words of the national anthem (which is not “God Bless America”), go to war in bad body armor, apply for unemployment and live within the Social Security/Medicare confines. Until its members finally figure out who they work for, much of America is ready and maybe eager for a civil war… against our government.

@Grisson: embargo includes the sea. Given modern technology, I think that embargo could be more effective than the land-based ones.

Tugged away in their nuke-proof bunker, the Walmart Waltons would use their billions to orchestrate the US to be overrun by 22 Million $1.55/hr Chinese mercenaries, enslaving the American populace into new labor camps, where they would spend out the rest of their natural lives making toys and toothpaste they’d use to conquer the Europeans. (Dang Frenchies and Krauts just wouldn’t buy the Chinese crap).

Welcome to the Walmartian Dynasty of the North American Empire.

@dallon: Yeah, I know, hence my caveat. You just did a good enough job with your mock seriousnees that I wasn’t quite sure.

Lots of dead people and one happy russia

It would be states in debt vs states debt free.

CA feeds like half the world. It would be pretty hard to starve us. Besides, my civil war is between the west coast and the rest of the US. We’d have tons of natural resources and tons of money (entertainment, food, computers). Bring it on.

@daloon, beautiful piece of speculative fiction. So are you writing the book?

But don’t you think various foreign governments, such as Japan and India, would see an opportunity for advantage and want to jump in on one side or the other and shift the balance of things? And wouldn’t tons of splinter groups emerge and cast their lot with the Center or the Coasts depending on how it would benefit them? What would it take to drive the Coasts into battle against each other? And what role would technology play?

Oh God, the pot boiler? Nice sympathetic heroic nerd character gets caught up in fight? Seems to have access to all knowledge except the most important thing? Lives in a Gibsonian virtual world and has a virtual girlfriend who lives on the other side (romeo, romeo, where for art thou, romeo)? Strange alliance with strange psuedo corporata (a la Sterling)? Stephensonian genetically engineered viruses running rampant in real life somehow combine with runaway nanotech to swallow Kansas, leading to a diaspora of Kansans (including love interest) to a reservation they call Oz, many falling sick on the way (trail of tears)? Oh, and Chinese and Indo-Paki (hey, presto-zappo, Muslims and Hindus have magically made an economic uber-alliance) space communities with weapons both sides end up in a national bidding war to win an alliance (economic manhattan project)? Why not throw in the construction of a tunnel for a trans-continental super-speed train, and a nano-built carbon fiber space elevator, too?

Hmmm. Should it end in an indeterminate way, demanding a sequel, or should the denouement involve a secret communication with an alien species that has godlike powers, making all fights kind of irrelevant?

I don’t think so.

You know, if it were a Civil war, then I would expect it to be quite pleasant.

Maybe a rousing game of chess over morning coffee. Then we’d go out and play laser tag until lunch. After that it would be on to the big arena for the afternoon fist shaking and grumbling. A nice dinner and then some Call of Duty or World of Warcraft in the evening before retiring for the night.

Cyber warfare between time zones (doff of the hat to Cory Doctorow).

Texas secedes to join Mexico as the country of Tex-Mex. Food lovers rejoice, Uncle Sam invades.

Key West secedes again, this time for real. The last operational PT boat raids seaside bars in Miami Beach.

I’ve always thought that wars should be settled by a match of Call of Duty 4. Much more fun, much cheaper, would make about as much sense, and would at the very least promote the developement of ultra-fast processors to gain the technological edge. The movies wouldn’t be as good, though.

Uh, folks, this thread just became a lot more germane. Some nine states have now crafted bills declaring sovereignty under the 10th Amendment.
Starting new thread.

And what do you suppose that means? They are not planning to secede. The California bill has a date of 1994, not exactly last week.

~ Oh No!!! I’m going out to stock up on the guns and ammo now!!! Meet me in the bunker : )

@Sorceren , the 14th Amendment effectively repealed the 10th, but nobody read the fine print.

Here is the next Civil War:

1) Texas secedes from the Union.
2) Chuck Norris is elected president by acclamation.
3) Obama says, “Yeah, whatever. Don’t let the doorknob get stuck in your ass on the way out.”
4) Texas is unable to secure its border with Mexico, despite positioning guard towers every 100 meters and shooting everybody who tries to sneak across.
5) The Norris government is overthrown by the Mexican drug cartels, who are aided by 12,221 Texan gun dealers fearful of losing their customer base.
7) Obama reluctantly sends Federal troops to end the violence.

it would be kind of poetic if it resembled any number of the Civil conflicts raging around the world that America had a hand in perpetuating… take your pick, something topical, like Sri Lanka perhaps or maybe Colombia is more to your liking or Palestine, or Afghanistan, or Iraq, or Georgia a few months back, or South East Asia in the 60’s and 70’s. Korea in the 50’s and so forth :)

It would be a bunch of Red Necks hanging out at the border. Drinking beer and smoking a pig. Yeee Haw!
I’ll bring the banjo.

@IchtheosaurusRex—step 4 would be “Texas annexes Mexico.” Just keeping all those remittances spent in-country would erase the state’s deficit, if any.

Step 5 would be “Libertarians from all over the nation flood Texas, helping to secure the newly built border fences and munitions. They elect Chuck Norris by acclamation to a life position of advisor to the leader.”

It definetely would not be the north versus the south. in my heart, i believe another civil war is coming for America. the participants will be legal American citizens against illegal immigrants. they are 20 million strong now and the numbers keep rising. it will come to the point, where the legals will no longer tolerate losing theirs jobs to the illegals and all the freebies the Feds are giving to them. i say, be an American,,,just be legal.

I don’t know too many legals that want the kinds of jobs illegals are willing to do.

@laureth – when I was young and poor I was willing to do a lot of those jobs, but not now that I am old, fat, and on a pension. However, if inflation keeps on going I might be in the market again.