How do you feel toward "home made" gifts? Either giving or getting?

It’s my father’s birthday today, 75 years old. I’m making him lemon bars. He wouldn’t want anything else. I guess when you get older, the material things aren’t as important.

You can’t make an iPod or a big screen TV at home. :)

Yeah it’s the thought that counts sometimes but frequently in the past I appreciate the thought, but the trinket gets tossed many times after the mandatory keeping-it-so-they-aren’t-offended period. My wife and I don’t have a very crafty decor in our house so things like that don’t really fit in.

If the person doesn’t want anything for real, then that’s different I think. Then the home made gift is “extra”. Not really part of a gift exchanging.

If it’s obvious that someone put time and effort into making something for me, I think it’s very sweet.

I have completely reversed myself on this. I love homemade cards and gifts. I am delighted that the giver took the thought, time and effort to make me something in this gift-card impersonal world.

I’m just the opposite. I’m extremely uncomfortable with money being spent on me. My family hates trying to shop for me. I’d prefer something someone took the time to make for me, because I know they took the time and effort to do something, from the heart for me.

I’m not big on jewelry. I don’t need more stuff. It just sits there, anyway. If I get a gift card, rarely, do I use it to truly splurge on myself. I’m very practical in some parts in my life.

I love the ornaments my sister made for me, I framed the picture my daughter painted for me. My husband made me a new hope chest to store things from my childhood. My other one has my children’s baby things in it – so I had lost my space. I generally would rather someone make something – baked, made – whatever – than to spend a bunch of money on something.

Some people just don’t have the money to buy a gift. Their only option is to make something themselves.

It depends on the gift, of course. You can get tacky & then you can get beautiful one of a kinds items. I’ve made lamps with clear vases, clear marbles, potpourri & white lights. They’re beautiful & I’ve given many as gifts.

I would much rather have home made gifts than store bought ones. I still have all of the presents that my grandparents made for me and I can’t help but smile everytime I look at them.

I love giving and getting homemade gifts of all sorts, even if they’re dinky little presents I make in a few minutes. I feel it’s an expression of someone’s creativity and time. Giving someone a present I bought doesn’t have this feeling at all.

I don’t agree with how some people see gifts. I find it materialistic and tacky to give a large or large-valued present to someone. My tastes are extremely particular and I support/don’t support certain companies. Plus, if I am paying my money to buy you a present, and you pay money to buy me a present, and this results in having an item of anywhere between 10–100% relevance or usefulness, why don’t we just keep our money and buy our own things, and instead exchange dinky little gifts of interest – or simply enjoy each other’s company?

I am going to look like an ass here. I think if a person is really good at something, say crafting. Painting things on a piece of wood. But the person they are giving that to doesn’t decorate to that style that isn’t the best thing to do. In the end we have stuff like that that is taking up space in the basement. Although the same thing can happen with purchased gifts.

When it’s kids I love them all and would add on to the house to keep the stuff.

I would rather a person make time to spend with me.

I would rather a good gift. A good gift is something I will appreciate—not something I will stretch myself to thank you for, then stash in the back of the closet. If you can’t think of something to buy me that’s a good gift, but you can make a great card or some brownies or whatever, I’m all about that. However, if you give me a scarf when I already have seven hundred of them and am clearly in LOVE with my favorite one and you know I’ll never use yours…. thanks but you could have just made some brownies.

If it’s a crap gift—useless bought thing or a useless made thing, I’d rather not get it. If it’s a good gift—crafted or purchased, I’m all about it. The best gifts I’ve ever gotten were homemade. It wasn’t that they were homemade that made them awesome. It was that they were awesome.

No, really, one of my friends got a Barbie that looked a bit like me, made some clothes and accessories, and made a Real Adult, Now EmpressPixie doll for my 21st birthday. The attention to detail was amazing. Example: My laptop is one of the accessories. It is open to my homepage, which was LiveJournal at the time, complete with a color printout of the homepage. It was an incredibly detailed, accurate gift. Awesome.

We have started making candles at home. we are very conscientious about how we make them, and make them with very exacting standards. Everyone on our list is getting homemade candles for Giftmas (or whatever) in 2009. If they don’t like it, tough. I am not going to go out and buy a bunch of expensive junk made in China just because people expect it. No one on our list is of the type to expect us to know what to buy them, and besides, last year we gave out store gift cards so they could buy what they wanted anyway.

Im with EmpressPixie on this one, it depends what the gift is. Homemade gifts have the ability to be a million times better than anything you can ever find in a store or they can be crap. They do get an extra couple of points off the bat though for being homemade cause you know that person put all that time and effort into making it for you.

A fellow flutherer carved me a pipe out of stone and sent it to me with the date and my username carved into it. Thats probably the coolest homemade gift i ever got.

The homemade gifts I get are from people who spend all their money on themselves and THEN don’t have money to buy gifts. So they make homemade gifts and tell you some inflated cost. Try to give THEM a cheap gift, however.

Would this make a difference?

I generally prefer homemade gifts over anything bought. And food of any kind, homemade of course, is always appreciated! But for me, it really is the thought/sentiment that counts. So, if someone knows I’m really into some-off-the-wall collecting or something, or I really enjoy a particular author/artist/musician/whatever, and someone goes out of their way to track down some rare or hard to find item from said author/artist/musician/whatever, then I’ll totally be touched. Also really cool is planning a surprise day togehter, or even a trip together. If someone buys me some expensive gift and expects me to be impressed just b/c of the price tag, they’re barking up the wrong tree. Instead of something stupid like a new tv, I’d be much more impressed by taking that money and planning an unexpected, surprise trip somewhere together, doing something real together and creating some real memories together. I’m really not down w/ materialism or consumerism, but that’s just me…

Damn, @Mr_M. You need to meet some new people. What you’ve described sounds pretty selfish. I’d rather not get a gift at all from people like that. Just tell them you’d rather not exchange presents, then, and there’ll be no need for wasting energy and resources, or increasing resentments.

@uberbatman: that sounds really cool.

@Mr M: Again, it depends on the gift. Technically when I got my doll, that’s what it was. My best friend spent all her money on herself and didn’t have any to spend on me. So she bought a really cheap doll and went at it. I was totally in love with the results. I still am. She was incredibly embarrassed that she had to do something like that instead of buying me something “nice”. The difference between the situations probably being that when I say “spent all her money on herself”, I actually mean rent and food as opposed to, say, going out, drinking, etc.

If your friends are spending selfishly on themselves then tossing you something crappy you made, without care to if you would like it, then that’s something else entirely. Something not good.

I think it depends on what the gift actually is…if it’s cookies or a frame or flower pot and it’s obvious the person didn’t put a lot of time or thought into it, then I might be offended, unless it was just a random gift for no reason. If it’s obvious that a decent amount of thought and work went into the gift though, then it can be really special. One of the best gifts I’ve ever been given was a homemade long-eared bunny that my aunt made me for my birthday. It’s very good quality, and she made a cute dress for it with a pink shirt (which is my favorite color) underneath an apron dress with a kitten pattern, because I love cats. She even made a pearl necklace for it with eight beads, since it was my eighth birthday. It’s a gift that was a lot more personal than an expensive electronic-something or a gift card, and it’s very special to me. Almost 13 years later I still have it on my bed :)

I would presume that the deciding factor is how well you know the other person. A handmade gift is a more personal reflection of the giver than something storebought, so if the person recieving the gift is a close relative who really does cherish the thought of you, then something you make yourself is at least as, if not more, appropriate. But if you are giving a gift to a coworker, they probably don’t want to spend a whole lot of time poring over mementoes of you, and would really prefer some loot.

I once went to Build-A-Bear and made a bear for a friend to match a character he played on Broadway. I managed to find, in the random BAB clothing bins, a leopard vest exactly like his, white sweats, slouch socks, and for the boots, I just happened to have fabric that looked exactly like the sparkly sneakers he wore. I bought a pair of BAB sneakers and painstakingly cut and glued the fabric to every visible inch so they looked exactly like his… the bear came out fantastic. The character’s name was Marilyn, so I called it “Bearilyn.” He’s in love with that bear, and he prominintely displays it in his apartment, wherever he moves to. On the other hand, the first gift I gave this friend, was an insulated coffee mug with his initials engraved on it, because he was always drinking coffee. He never uses it. Lots of thought was placed into both gifts, but the handmade one is cherished, and the storebought one is forgotten.

@poof, I really don’t consider the “Build-A-Bear” a homemade gift. Those things are NOT cheap.

@Ashpea9288 Ooohhhh, that sounds like a great bunny. I’m sure it’s near & dear to your heart.

@M: No, but it wasn’t any old Build-A-Bear. Especially the shoes. They were the first things he noticed. I should also point out that this was several years ago when BAB was cheaper.

It does depend on the gift, but I don’t tend to get crappy handmade gifts. My mom made a quilt for me in a pattern and colors I love. It fits over a walnut bed that my dad made for me. One of the best mother’s day gifts I ever had was last year when my kids made a multi-course fondue at my daughter’s place. The best Christmas gifts we got from neighbors were baskets of homemade goodies including cookies, spiced cocoas, and fudge. My husband’s made hardwood boxes for me. I really enjoy all these thing.

Of course I don’t think that any of the handmade gifts I’ve given are crappy either. I don’t make things for just anyone, though. I’ve knitted socks, gloves, sweaters, hats, scarves, etc. I’ve made stained glass lamps, boxes, candle holders, and window hangings. All for close family. Most of the items they requested and knew they were coming. When that’s the case I tend to involve the recipient in things like color selection.

A crappy gift is a crappy gift. Purchasing it doesn’t rectify that. I assume that most adults will buy themselves exactly what they want. My pleasure around a gift has to do with the excitement the giver puts into the giving, not necessarily the thing itself.

Its sooooo cheap, I hate that.
The only excuse that is acceptable when giving a handmade gift is if you’re an infant.

@punkrockworld: A lot of handmade gifts aren’t actually all that cheap to make, though.

@cyndyh, no, that’s true. I knit a lot of hats just for the heck of it, and several people have asked me to make them this hat (this one is not mine). I usually use a multicolor Japanese yarn, and it costs about $30 a hat to make. I’ve made about 10 of these. My daughter created a scrap book for her father of all his family photos that he had shoved in a box, and ended up spending $75 on it. My nephew always asks for home baked sugar cookies for Christmas.

@AlfredaPrufrock – does that include putting a price on the time you spent? also on the invaluable thought behind it?

is suddenly glad she’s not related to punkrockworld.

@AlfredaPrufrock: Exactly! Knitting is expensive. I’ve spent up to $150 for the wool blend for one sweater. A pair of socks can cost 20–40 dollars, especially if you’re looking at Silk or Cashmere. My husband’s woodworking is expensive. I don’t even want to think about the tools, but the wood itself is pricey. Of course the stuff I like the look of most is crazy expensive. My glass work is expensive, even after having the tools. A box I made for my daughter’s art pencils probably costs over $50 even when I was buying cheap and using scraps when I could. When my mom made my quilt I loved it and knew the time she must have put into it, but go to a quilt shop and look at the price of that material these days, too. Holy Mole!

I love the hat. I’ve made some Entrelac socks and a sweater that I love. That effect is so neat I just love doing it.

@Bri_L: No, that doesn’t include anything but the materials. Having said all this about the cost, I also like to look at it as saving money. I justify it this way. :^> I’d probably be spending that much on some other hobby if I wasn’t in the shop or knitting. This way I have the hobbies and I also get some neat unique gifts as an end product.

@all: I will say to anyone who doesn’t appreciate handmade gifts that maybe you should tell the giver. I know I don’t like to waste my time and efforts (or my money) on someone who wouldn’t appreciate them. Cheers!

How are you gonna tell the giver without coming across bad? Better to take it and say “WOW!!!”.

Truthfully, though, knitted items are a different category, SO LONG AS you make it FOR the specific person, IMHO.

Maybe at the moment of the party isn’t the time. But you can tell them later when you’re alone that it’s not really your thing and you don’t want the person to feel bad but that you don’t want them to spend so much time on something you’re not that into. I know I’d rather hear that after one handmade gift and save my time next time around.

@Bri_L, no, that doesn’t include time. I chalk the time up to “mental health.” I use good yarn, wools or silk blends, sometimes bamboo.

@Mr_M, I usually thank the giver for the time and the thoughtfulness. There’s the lie: “thank you for the sandscape in the jar! Just what I wanted” and the truth: “That was really thoughtful of you to remember me. It must have taken a lot of time and patience to get that sand in the jar so it made a coyote howling at the moon.”

My point was that there is value to your time, even if you derive pleasure or benefit from it as well.

@Bri_L: I figured that’s what you meant, but I wanted to be clear, too. Cheers!

@cyndyh what no hat? hehe cheers!

Smart ass. :^>

for me, i love handmade things, especially if the person making the gift is talented.

also, you may think some things are cheap, but may have taken the person hours of time to make.

Maybe my problem is with pictures. I got a couple of pictures that I probably could have made myself. And I KNOW the individual had few out of pocket expenses related to the pic.

Yeah, I think it’s really different if you think the gift itself is thoughtless. Thoughtless gift giving reminds me of this bit. Enjoy. :^>

Stacy: Well, don’t you want to open your present?
Wayne Campbell: If it’s a severed head I’m going to be very upset
Stacy: Open it.
Wayne Campbell: What is it?
Stacy: It’s a gun rack.
Wayne Campbell: A gun rack… a gun rack. I don’t even own a gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack. What am I gonna do… with a gun rack?
Stacy: You don’t like it? Fine. You know Wayne, if you’re not careful, you’re going to lose me.
Wayne Campbell: I lost you 2 months ago. We broke up. Are you mental? Get the net!

@Cyndyh: If I could give you more than one GA, I would. I love that movie and know it by heart. Oh… wait. I think now I need to run over to this thread..

I love that movie, too. I once had an ex buy me the most hideous gown and my first thought was “a gun rack”. :^>

i love homemade gifts. i don’t get them often though.

most of my gifts to my friends are homemade, and although i’m not always completely happy with them, i really hope they like them, because it usually takes a lot of time and thought. i never know what to buy for people, but i can usually think of something to make them.
recently i was at a complete loss of what to get one of my best friends for her birthday, and i ended up crocheting a giraffe for her – it was my first crocheting project that was more complicated than a scarf, and it’s quite rough around the edges, but i really put a lot into it. a lot of homemade gifts actually do cost more than you’d think, too. or they make up for money and…fancyness?...with time and complications and whatnot. of course, if they just drew a stick figure or something and gave it to you, i’d prefer something from a store too.

but honestly, i’d be thrilled if a friend just made me a CD of songs they really care about or think are quirky or that remind them of me, etc. i can go to target to buy myself something any time, but i can’t make something from someone elses perspective.