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lostinwoods's avatar

Should i stay with this girl, who is giving me mix signals?

Asked by lostinwoods (21 points ) February 19th, 2009

So i am like in love with this girl…But i don’t think she still love me.. or maybe i am wrong. we went out for almost for a year and i broke up with her… lets just say i was stupid, i left her for someone else. After a few months i started to talk to her again and finally broke off my gf. Thats when i realize that i still love my first girlfriend. She was my first love and i don’t think i can leave her. So when istarted talking to her again and i told her that i still love her and she told me that she moved on, but i know that wasn’t true. So one night we talked for so long on the phone and finally she broke down and told me that she still loved me and still want me back. she told me that will break off her current bf slowly and come back to me. So after a few days later i did something stupid, i was being too pushy?? so i pushed her too much on getting back with me…. so we had several arguments and later she told me she didnt’ want be friends anymore… so i did as she told… so we stop talking for two months and after that two months i started to talk to her again… and she was cold to me first but later she got a little nicer…. i also found out that she broke up with her bf… So know we are talking and joking as usually like when we are together… but i know some difference in her… she never start a conversation or call me. i have to make the move to talk to her, when we talk we talk for hours like 5. But sometimes i get this feeling like she lost interestes in me and doesn’t want me anymore. like whenever i want to hang out with her she would say no.. but we aim alot..

So the deal is… when her mentor told her to draw someone sculpture your life, she draw a picture of me and her when we first met…... does that mean she still love me??

when we talk on phone, she and i would have a nice conversation and we wouldn’t stop… but as soon as she goes on aim, she becomes something else? or may i am just reading it the wrong way…
is she wrapping in her cocoon so that no one can hurt her again? or she is totally over me and want to have nothing to do with me?
i really really love her,,,, should i move on?? or keep on waiting… i have been waiting for her for 5 months already…

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10 Answers

flameboi's avatar

This is about you now, take your chance, go, get something nice, knock her door and say the most difficult words you will ever utter, look at her, take her hand and ask for forgiveness, say you are sorry…

lostinwoods's avatar

i am afraid that i am pushing her more into a relationship that she doesn’t want. i know she is building a cocoon around herself that she wont’ get hurt again..

Emdean1's avatar

She probably has her guard up since you broke things off with her. Give it time if its meant to be IT WILL BE! Try to remain good friends and take it slow. If she loves you she will notice that you are trying and she will come around.

Les's avatar

Uh…move on. Let me tell you a little secret: there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about my first love. Everyday. Something will remind me of him, and I’ll reminisce. It is understandable to feel this way about a first love; it was the first person who let you put your guard down and be loved, and to love in return. You can’t ever replace that first one. But believe me. It sounds like she is trying to move on, but you’re not letting her. Every time you pop back into her life after these two, three, four months of not talking is probably driving her insane (it happened to me, I know how it feels).
Give her the respect she deserves to let her go. Talk to her again, and tell her that you want her to be happy and she should just go on with her life (and you should too). But don’t keep pestering her. Go and live and find someone else.

marinelife's avatar

Have an open conversation with her. No more guesswork.

Tell her you still care about her, you are sorry about what happened, and you would like to try again. Mention that you have noticed that she does not contact you and that she won’t go places with you. Ask her if there is a chance for the two of you.

If she says no, respect her feelings. Move on. It will not happen as long as you keep talking to her.

Good luck.

Adina1968's avatar

I saw your question and for some reason it made me think of the other similar questions that had proceeded it on Fluther and out there in the world. I realized that 99% of the time if you have to ask…deep down in your heart you really know the answer.

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

You don’t get to dictate the timetable on earning back trust. You have to decide, are you happier waiting for her to make up her mind, or would you be happier pursuing someone else? That’s the price of dumping her in the first place, and realizing your mistake.

azhaiaziam's avatar

Just forget about her.. Move on!! She is just playing mind games with you.. she aint going out of her way to show any interest. S

Xilas's avatar

she either wants you to work for it and show her that you’re worth another shot – or she is completely ****ing with your head…

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