General Question

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70 Answers

EmpressPixie's avatar

Yes! What kind of question is that? You kissed another person, unless it was a family-esque kiss, that’s a-cheating.

Shecky_Johnson's avatar

@EmpressPixie I agree. I just got in a deep conversation with a friend of mine about it and wanted to see what the flutherinos thought.

mamabeverley's avatar

Is you S.O. or spouse watching/participating. If He/she is then no, it is not cheating.

Likeradar's avatar

It depends on the “rules” of your relationship. Some people consider porn cheating. Some people allow sex outside the primary relationship. It depends on the situation. It needs to be talked about before it happens, though.

I say yes, definitley. I think most people would agree with me, but that doesn’t make it true in every situation.

A_Beaverhausen's avatar

not if its a realitive or a close family friend.

essieness's avatar

Yeah, unless you’re in an open relationship where those rules are more loosely defined. A kiss is very intimate. It would be hard to justify that there was no emotion involved unless drugs were involved.

EmpressPixie's avatar

I just sent the link for this Q to my boyfriend with the message, “I just want to make sure we’re on the same page here.”

jonsblond's avatar

I consider it cheating.

Qingu's avatar

Only on the genitals.

VzzBzz's avatar

I feel it is, at least that it’s felt like when I’ve done it.

Jack79's avatar

yes, and asking for forgiveness on the internet instead of comfronting your boyfriend makes it even worse.

wundayatta's avatar

Only in Texas Hold ‘em.

eenerweiner's avatar

Only on days that end in y.

ShauneP82's avatar

I kind of have to agree with @Likeradar on this one. It really depends on the relationship. If it were my relationship. I would say yes.

Mr_M's avatar

It’s definitely not cheating. Anyone wanna make out?

Likeradar's avatar

I used to feel like some kissing wasn’t cheating. I have a super cute friend I used to kiss when I was drunk- he’s gay and just plain fun to kiss. My boyfriend said “so next time I’m drunk I can kiss a lesbian?” Um… no. That would be cheating. If it’s outside my rules for him to do it, I can’t do it either.

Horus515's avatar

Heck yeah thats cheating!

jbfletcherfan's avatar

It depends on what kind of a kiss it is. I kiss a lot of guys, but they’re not like I kiss my husband. 99% of these kisses are IN FRONT of hubby, so like I say, there’s kisses & then there’s KISSES.

Mr_M's avatar

@Likeradar, what makes someone “fun to kiss”?

essieness's avatar

@Likeradar So I have to ask, if he was gay and there’s no relationship going on between you… what was the point of kissing? I don’t get it. Seriously just wondering, not trying to be rude :)

Mr_M's avatar

@A_Beaverhausen, Where?! Where?!!

Did I mention, I’m “fun to kiss”!???

cwilbur's avatar

Cheating is breaking the terms of your relationship. If your partner thinks that a kiss is cheating, then it’s cheating. If your partner thinks that it’s only cheating if there’s tongue, well, that’s the rule. And your partner might not think it’s cheating at all.

aprilsimnel's avatar

@Shecky_Johnson – Lurve for the 90s flashback in your tags!

mamabeverley's avatar

@Mr_M YOU ARE SOOOO BAD!!!

Likeradar's avatar

@essieness I know you’re not being rude :). There’s not much to it, really. We’re madly in love on a platonic level. I think he’s hot, he thinks I’m hot (for someone without a penis), and we get really silly when we drink together. It started once when he was complaining about how his ex kissed, and we got talking about technique and used each other as models to demonstrate. It’s really pretty damn immature. :)

@Mr M it’s that indescribable something… you know what I mean, right?

Shecky_Johnson's avatar

@aprilsimnel Thank you. I always include one silly tag in my questions.Don’t tell the mods. I’m not sure they can handle it.

mamabeverley's avatar

@Likeradar Lurve your answer!! If we are not playing by my rules, I won’t play!!

Zen's avatar

Yes. Period. Who gave the slut “great question” lurve? Evrul!

Just teasing, chill.

ShauneP82's avatar

@Zen Yeah, sorry that was me. lol.

StephK's avatar

If you have to ask, then yes. I think so.

Zen's avatar

@ShauneP82 Well, take it back, dammit. Or at least get her number and a kiss for it.

essieness's avatar

Why are some of you assuming that the questioner has been kissing someone outside of his or her relationship? This could be a completely rhetorical question. I think we should stick to giving our opinions on the subject rather than question @Shecky_Johnson‘s morality.

Zen's avatar

Hunh?

I’ll ask some great questions then: Is hugging lovely? Is marriage fun? Do you like walks? Do you pet your dog? If we met and I was crying, would you hand me a tissue?

essieness's avatar

@Zen That’s not a very zen-like answer…

Zen's avatar

My bad. I’m Evrul sometimes. Sorry.

essieness's avatar

@Zen lol, please bend over for your spanking.

3or4monsters's avatar

Oh Shecky, I love you, but we’re not allowed to kiss.

Shecky_Johnson's avatar

@3or4monsters I love you, too, 3. But why can’t we make with the kissing?

Zen's avatar

Kissing girls, spanking, what is this place?

3or4monsters's avatar

@Shecky_Johnson Alas, it would be cheating. ;)

Shecky_Johnson's avatar

@3or4monsters I gotcha. Ah, well. At least we know where we stand.

casheroo's avatar

It’d be cheating if it occured in my marriage. All relationships have different standards though.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I agree with cwilbur…every relationship is different…what cheating is to me is breaking trust and doing something with another that you and your partner didn’t agree with..my marriage is open, so our standards are different from that of other people, but ‘cheating’ can still occur if something is done behind either mine or his back and then it’s just as painful and I’m glad I’ve never had to deal with it

Shecky_Johnson's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir I guess my question to you is why have an open marriage if it’s possible to cross that line?
Great to see you again, by the way. How’s the kids?

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@Shecky_Johnson
well because monogamy isn’t a safeguard against cheating and neither is an open marriage…one has an open marriage for various reasons but for us, it’s something I’ve learned that I need because of my other relationships…and also, it’s a philosophical principle where your partner is allowed to do those flirtations, those meet ups, those other people but always chooses you at the end of the day…you know they’re with you not because of a contract or a piece of paper or because they’re scared to cheat…I found that it works for us and the only downside is the other people, the other people who can’t get it through their heads that they’re just not people who’ll break us up…we never lead them on and they still think they’re somehow special enough to do that…oh and the kids are great, thanks

casheroo's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir Can I ask, why did you get married then? What’s the point of marriage for you, if you two aren’t monogamous? Couldn’t you have continued to be committed to each other, and been life partners, but stay unmarried?

mamabeverley's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir Good 4 u. If it works who are we to say anything!

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@casheroo
because marriage to me doesn’t mean monogamy…and clear it often doesn’t work out that way for people…marriage to me means a commitment to a person for life and for family…and unfortunately there are many benefits in our society attached to marriage that are necessary for our kids (like health insurance and a lot of other things)...if there were no benefits attached to it, I wouldn’t get married…it’s just an institution…but my commitment to him is regardless of marriage or not marriage…

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@casheroo
i further don’t like the institution of marriage because queer people can’t get married in many states and right wingers and others nutters think there’s something to the whole ‘marriage is a sacred religious’ spiel when they’re the ones that time and again prove that it doesn’t work, religious or not

laureth's avatar

Marriage has lots of benefits that have nothing to do with monogamy. Even if people have an open relationship, I’m sure some of them appreciate the convenience of being able to see their lifemate in a hospital situation, or filing joint taxes, etc.

Even though others said stuff much like this. Oops.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@laureth
exactly
it’s not like the only reason people get married is to ensure monogamy
what a horrible reason, by the way, to do anything…

AstroChuck's avatar

Of course it is. And so is eating.

laureth's avatar

Especially since it wouldn’t work. Either you’re monogamous or you’re not, with or without the paper.

ru2bz46's avatar

Definitely cheating.

casheroo's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir I was just wondering. I know about the legal benefits, it’s pretty much the main reason I know people get married. I actually couldn’t get married because of that! I would have lost my health insurance while pregnant, if we would have gotten married, so we waited..

SuperMouse's avatar

I’m thinking it would depend on the context of the kiss. A quick peck wouldn’t necessarily be cheating, but a deep, intimate lip lock would.

aviona's avatar

Guess it depends on your relationship. Communication is important.

Judi's avatar

yes.

Staalesen's avatar

Not at all, happens all the time.

Mr_M's avatar

Friends, would I lie? Trust me!!! It’s not cheating!! LET’S MAKE OUT!!! For Easter!!! Aren’t you supposed to once Lent is over?

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

Yes, I feel it is. If my SO was kissing someone else then I’d feel discounted, taken for granted and angry. I have let someone kiss me though when I was single and they weren’t- it still felt like cheating.

avvooooooo's avatar

Absolutely.

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