An NSFW question about sex?

Ooooh I’m following this one!

I’ll get back to you when I’m not at work.

I don’t think it is vanilla at all. Gutsy question and I appreciate your asking.

I would be interested to know, for those who partake under any circumstances, what kind of hygienic prep goes on.

I have the feeling that I’m going to be promiscuously lurving a lot of people in this thread.

Short-hand version of the question for any of you who just skipped down this far:

What is anal sex like? And why do you like it?

Because it feels good (to me) :)

I’ve only done it a few times, I didn’t like it very much. It wasn’t horrible and I think that if I had to I could learn to like it though. I have had someone lick me down there during a drunken sex session and it did feel prettttyyyy nice.

This morning, all three.
no wait, that was the newspaper question

You answered your own question kind of, guys that like it, like it because direct contact with the prostate is enjoyable to them.

With women, I’ve dated a couple girls who were into it. I’m not a huge fan myself, but I tried it, try everything at least once, kind of thing you know? and the first girl said she loved it but to be honest it didn’t much look like it… she said she liked it though just because it was a totally different sensation than what she was used to. The second girl said she liked it, and really looked like she did, she was a little into s&m and pain fetishes etc, so though I never asked her why she liked anal, I’m guess it had to do at least in part to those aspects about her.

@Bri_L for me, I wasn’t too psyched about it to begin with, for many of the reasons Dale mentioned he hasn’t ever tried it, but alas I am the biggest pushover when it comes to women, so I gave it a go, and surprisingly it was relatively cleanly really, I have absolutely no idea if these girls did something special about it before hand but it went pretty smoothly no pun intended

I really can’t do the whole mouth thing though, really… because though I’ve never inspected a ladies hind quarters, mine’s kinda hairy, so that’s not a risk I’m willing to take to be honest lol…

FWIW, answering the question “what is anal sex like” wouldn’t be likely to answer the questions I asked. I pointed out that I understand the prostate part of it, but I’m curious about situations where the prostate isn’t a factor…a) when women do it and enjoy it, b) when people orally pleasure someone’s sphincter, and c) what does having a huge bulbous piece of plastic pushed past your opening into your rectum do for you?

Have done it, and do enjoy it (giving and receiving – strap-on). A little rimming and/or circling of the anus gets one all relaxed, then insertion – slowly (otherwise, it’ll hurt like a fuck (heh)!). The one receiving being clean – very important. If done properly, if feels great. A butt plug, plus a strap-on (or a plain ol’ dildo) for the cooch – ton’s o’ fun.

I know I used to enjoy receiving it, but not in a “I need it now, it feels so good!” I think I liked the pleasing of my partner thing more than anything, and I was younger and my sexual taste was much different. I enjoyed being “degraded” as I now view it. I do not like that type of sex anymore, and would not agree to it.
Your second question: It tickles, I would only have it given to me after a shower but I do not give.
Re: butt plugs…I am not a homosexual male..so to me they are more humorous than anything. I would never stick something like that in my butt (or anything for that matter) I guess I don’t fully understand them…why would you want to be plugged up? And they look like they’d get stuck. I don’t get them. But they’re fun to look at.
I wouldn’t call my husband and I “vanilla” because we don’t participate in anal sex. I actual can’t have anal sex so it’s not even up for debate. This doesn’t bother my husband at all, he has no strong feelings about butt secks.

Since I am not a homosexual male, I cannot directly answer this question. I will say, however, that I will never allow my fiancee to put his junk in my trunk.

I like that wagon you’re draggin….

@All – first of all, re the “vanilla” comment, since a few have mentioned it, I just mean in general I’m not all that sexually adventurous…I’ve had 2 sex partners and married one of them, most often for me sex, when I even have it anymore, is missionary in the bedroom and for me that’s good enough. I’ve tried a couple things, but I know even if I were much better looking with a much larger penis and a great deal more stamina, I still wouldn’t make it in porn…all I’m saying. I didn’t mean to imply that you’re vanilla if you don’t regularly engage in butt play.

Now, I’ve also given GAs to those who have shared personal experience but I would like to engage in the occasional follow up question. Particularly, @jmah. First of all, I can’t discern from your answer if you are a lesbian female or a straight male who likes butt play. I will refrain from asking some questions until I know if you have a prostate, because that alone will answer at least one of my questions. But the question I have, you enjoy rimming, giving and receiving because it relaxes the area, fair enough, but that being the case, regardless of the cleanliness of your partner, is it a matter of you not really having a problem with the idea of what normally comes out of there, or is it a matter of getting over it is worth the end result? And if it’s the later, are there not other ways of achieving this goal that don’t involve potentially ingesting small amounts of feces?

@dalepetrie all of your questions ignore a basic fact: that not only is sex something that by definition will mean different things to different people, but it is also something that often defies the rational explanation you’re trying to give it. You talk about the anus and how feces come out of there, but forget that something just as dirty comes out the front too (both male and female). Yet most people (me included) are willing to lick that part (and yes, admittedly I’m pretty picky there and refuse to do it if it smells bad, and I’d never go down on a man for starters anyway).

My point is that you cannot find a logical explanation to these questions, because in the heat of the moment people will do things that they wouldn’t normally do if they stopped and thought about it. And this goes also for eating junkfood without thinking of what goes in it, or smoking cigarettes and not thinking about cancer. Obviously people who perform these acts do not think of the anus’ “other” function.

As far as the actual questions are concerned, I once had a girlfriend who could only reach an orgasm that way and not the “normal” way, and actually we never did it (except once) because she’d reach the orgasm real fast, turn over and fall asleep. I also tried it with another gf who hurt and so we stopped, and with my wife who said it was a weird feeling but enjoyed it overall. And I know of many women who seem to get actual sexual pleasure out of this, not only because their partner likes it. I also quite liked it personally.

As far as putting anything up my own anus, allowing anyone to lick it or licking anyone else’s…no, I’m just as disgusted by these things as you are. The difference is that I understand those that aren’t, and can actually enjoy them (using the analogy I mentioned above). The one thing I could never understand was this guy I read about who was not only a scatophage (I can even understand that!), but was asking people to “not waste feces by flushing” and put them in a package and mail them to him. There’s a limit to how gross someone can be, and I’m pretty sure he crossed it. But other than that, people can get turned on by all sorts of things that don’t make sense to anyone else.

btw I also have a question: what does NSFW stand for? I’ve seen it on some other questions too. Is it like “adult content” or something?

jmah is a female. and a lesbian (from what I recall talking to her about)

@jack79 nsfw means not safe for work.

@Jack79 “just as dirty” – not true. Urine is sterile (unless you have a bladder infection). Shit can kill you.

Not that I’d be eating pee, just saying.

@jack79 – GA, and I agree with you. I’m not looking for a one size fits all answer however, I suspect as with anything, people do things for different reasons, and I know that logic often doesn’t enter into these decisions. I’m just curious what different people will say they get out of it, I just like to ask questions like this because I’m very familiar with how I think, and I like to get more of an in depth understanding of the though processes (or lack thereof) of different people, how people justify things, how they overcome things, etc., just in hopes of understanding a bit more of what it means to be “human”, and not just “this human”. And that said, I do agree with @PupnTaco, I’d have far less problem with consuming urine as it does not contain e. coli. Not that I’d do so voluntarily, mind you…

@Jack79 I think about cancer every time I light up ;)

@Jack79 NSFW = Not Safe For Work

I’m a mostly straight female, and I love having my ass played with during sex. I find small things (a finger, a slim dildo) inserted very pleasant, but anything bigger than that hurts. If you lick me there, I will be in heaven! BTW, the point of a butt plug is to get is ‘stuck’, so it can be left in while you do other things. If it wasn’t shaped like that, your sphincter would push it right back out.

During sexual encounters, I don’t find myself thinking about what comes out of anything… just what can go in!

@Agent99 and @jmah – so, does having something stuck “up there” heighten the pleasure you receive vaginally then? Do you think that’s a physical or psychological thing? And what about having your anus penetrated with a dildo or finger…does that do something directly to the area, does it do something peripherally to heighten the other sexual pleasure, or is it more of a psychological thing (i.e., maybe you get off on the intimacy?)?

@PupnTaco @dalepetrie but the urine/feces comparison is technical again. When you’re turned on you don’t think of the micro-organisms you might swallow (actually I personally do and as I said I’d never lick someone’s butt, but I’m talking about other people who do that sort of thing). Even when you kiss someone in the mouth, they may have all sorts of viruses. Or you might kiss their hand and they had been to the toilet earlier and didn’t wash properly. But the whole point is we tend to not think of all that. We don’t even think about AIDS or pregnancy sometimes, which is why a huge percentage of us don’t use condoms. Or seatbelts for that matter. So the reason people do anything irrational (not just sex) is exactly that they don’t think about it.

Oh and thanks for the explanation

@dalepetrie Having something in your anus while having vaginal sex definitely heightens the overall pleasure of the act. anyone know how much butt plugs cost?

@Jack79 – I get that, I just could never lose myself enough in the moment to make it feasible. For me to get over something, I have to get something out of it. And I guess I get enough out of kissing and even giving head that I can get over what my logical mind knows…but I draw a line. I guess I’m looking for why people have different lines and why. Again, I don’t expect a universal answer.

@Facade – depends

ok, this is what I feel happening
and keep in mind I haven’t had this in a long, long time
when I am being done anally, I can feel my clitoris engorge
it is huge, then add the stimulation of being pulled, you must realize that the anal insertion effects the genitalia as well, and it is rhythmic and constant intensity.
that is for me anyway.

Casheroo is right; lesbian here. Rimming feels wonderful (and it relaxes you – so, it’s all good). And, sometimes, that’s all it is – rimming, for mere pleasure, and no penetration. As far as the rest (“being the dirty old place where we like to get together” Love Shack); because I’m so caught up in what I’m doing, and, am really into the person that I’m with, I don’t even think about it like that. Honestly.

Having a butt plug in, plus vaginal penetration is an amazing feeling (and add oral clitoral stimulation – Sweet Jebus!).

I had the lickens once. It was… AWESOME. I like to be touched around the be-hind a bit. No penetration, though. I’m too scared.

@prude and @jmah – great answers, that puts it in good perspective for me…I get it.

still not gonna try it though

I have never participated in any of the activities mentioned in the question. However, for the first time in my life I love someone and feel completely safe with him so I would probably consider doing some of these things. My interest comes more from curiosity then anything else. Kind of like @Aboynamedboobs03 said, a “try everything once kind of thing.” Apropos of nothing in this question I think there is a huge difference between experimenting in a loving monogamous relationship than doing it with a wide array of people.

Modified to Add: After reading some of these responses, I know I am interested in trying some of these things!

Wow, @dalepetrie makes anal sex sound so…. dirty.

Somehow I don’t think it needed my help to sound dirty.

Where’d I put my other fluther account, so I can answer this question…?

Okay, skipping down to keep my thoughts pure. If I repeat anything someone else has said, sorry in advance.

Rimming, that is, the act of tongue to anus, is just nasty. I’d never do it. Ick! My wife does enjoy having the ends of her butt cheeks lightly tickled. I mean the outermost portion of the butt cheek, just to the left and right of the anus. A light tickling sensation anywhere on the rear feels pretty good for both of us, especially when blindfolded.

As for finding the prostate via the anus, it is very exciting. It is possible to massage the prostate to the point it makes you cum without ever once touching your penis. All it takes is a thin dildo or a finger inserted a couple of inches, three at the most. Once you find it, you never forget where it is. It can also be massaged from the outside by rubbing the taint (taint your balls, taint your asshole). The prostate is quite the miracle organ when it comes to arousal. Prostate orgasms, also sometimes referred to as anal orgasms, are quite mind blowing, even more exciting than the ordinary semen blasters, at least for me. =)

The anus is not self-lubricating and you need to use plenty of lube to gain entrance. Slow and gentle is the only way. Hard and forceful can cause tears to the skin and flesh, and that is not a good place to have a wound. The anus is relatively clean, germ-wise, compared to your mouth. There are more germs in your mouth than in your colon, but since the bacteria that lives in your gut is not anything you want in your mouth, to put the two together is pretty unhygeinic. Anal sex can be quite enjoyable, and using a condom is best, just for safety’s sake. All toys and things inserted should be cleaned before and after. A butt plug givesd you a feeling of fullness, and for some reason, that feels good. Not like having to take a dump, but full in a way I can’t really describe. Having your anus gently stretched feels pretty good sometimes.

Anal sex isn’t for everybody. I have homosexual friends that refuse to go there, which is funny, because most straights think all gay men are ‘butt pirates’ =) I enjoy receiving it, my wife enjoys giving it, and we have a lot of fun doing it. She’s tried receiving it, and she really doesn’t care for it, unless its a thin dildo. Not my penis, that’s for sure. Sometimes though, she asks for it, and when she is plugged in the butt and gets some vaginal insertion, she almost literally climbs the wall during orgasm.

I hope that helps to answer some of your questions.

@evelyns_pet_zebra lurve brother!

Sorry for the misspellings, I shamefully turn in my Spelling Nazi Membership Card!

@evelyns_pet_zebra you’re neither nazi (despite your admission) nor (by your admission) a good speller :) peace, ok?

@evelyns_pet_zebra – an incredibly thorough and detailed GA, thank you.

@dalepetrie if there’s one thing I am an expert at, its sex and sexual practices.

You should sell lessons.

Where do I sign up?

Naw, I refuse to sell my knowledge, however, I should write a pamphlet and take it door to door and just accept donations. =)

@evelyns_pet_zebra replace the jehovah’s witness…. “Hi, have you heard of the wonders of anal sex and how it can improve your life and bring you eternal happiness?”

So, a turd happens to get placed on your lover’s tongue. Are they unclean forever? Are they a damaged person? Poo is gross, but it’s not a means to an isolation.

“I’d simply be unable to overcome the idea that I was eating shit, if even a microscopic amount” You do know that everytime you brush your teeth you are putting shit in your mouth , everytime you flush the toilet fecal matter floats in the air and clings to things even if you close the lid . You better stop that aswell if you don’t wanna eat shit .
i know this has not alot to do with your Q , but in a way it does regardin the eating shit line.

@dnooman and @sandystrachan – it’s more the idea that if someone does so voluntarily, something about that doesn’t sit right with me. I also understand that if you eat meat you’re probably ingesting animal feces. I just try to avoid it where I can.

When I made my first foray into anal sex, I too was a bit concerned with the whole “but it’s where poop comes from!” idea. But over time I realized that my preconception was just that. With a good shower and washing (and a quick finger inside), the butthole and the first inch or two become perfectly clean. I would no less hesitate to lick a clean butthole than I would hesitate to lick a clean vagina or penis. And if you’re really squicked out about poop/e-coli, you should see that Mythbusters episode where they test to see if keeping your toothbrush close to the toilet is a health risk. It has a very surprising ending.

The feeling of being rimmed is indescribable. Suffice to say it is very much pleasurable and a unique kind of pleasure that can’t be found elsewhere. It’s not enough to bring me to an orgasm, but it certainly adds a level to sex that is often left unreached.

Small insertions are also very pleasurable. Things like anal dildos, buttplugs (it’s fun to put one in and wear it around when no one else knows what’s going on, as it shifts around slightly when you walk and causes little pleasure pulses), anal beads, fingers, etc are all very fun to play with. The butthole has tons of nerve endings, thus it is very enjoyable to play with.

Personally, I don’t enjoy full on anal sex though. The simple reason is that since us gals don’t have prostates, there’s not a whole lot of nerve endings deep in there, thus deep penetration is neither painful nor pleasureful, it just is. However since my male partner really enjoys the warm and tight feeling it provides, I am more than willing to accommodate his desire, as long as he makes it quick – cause there’s nothing weirder than the feeling to have to poop even though you know it’s just a penis in there!

What does my partner get from licking my butthole? Well usually it leads to buttsex, so that’s good enough of a reason for him! But beyond that, he enjoys being able to bring me to different levels of pleasure that I cannot get to myself.

There we go, a detailed woman’s perspective on buttsex :)

On the ass-licking, all I can say is YUCK! I must agree if it’s meant for something to come out then that’s all that needs to happen. However, my hubby talked me into it once and it was highly unpleasant. How anyone could possibly enjoy having rammed up their behind is a mystery to me. To quote the Tootsie Pop commercial good comparison? “The world may never know!”

Some of you make this all sound so exciting! Lurve because I never thought it would be enticing to me. Here’s my dilemma, I wouldn’t want to damage my sphincteror tear(huge fear of that), and not trying to brag :P but my man’s wang is way too big, I honestly don’t thing I could handle it and I’m just not enough into toys. I guess I’ll leave the ass lickin and fudge packin to all of you! Have some for me too! ;-)

You think your tooth brush might be dirty.

The dirtiest item in most hotel rooms is the remote control. Think of allllll the things people do, touch, eat and scratch and then handle that remote.

Very few hotels actually do anything to adequately clean it, if anything at all. Just put it back on the set.

It’s not just the prostate that makes it feel good. There are a lot of nerves in that area, and it can feel good to be caressed or gently stretched. Also, lube and other immediate preparations aside, you need to be mentally and physically ready to be the receptive partner – mentally, you need to be relaxed and willing, which is harder than it seems the first few times, and physically, you need to be relaxed and flexible. Butt plugs help with that: they get you ready mentally and physically to have something of a certain size up there.

No one has addressed the hygiene question. When I am in a relationship with someone who is into that, I veeerrrrrry carefully shave the area. I was wondering if others have tips on keeping the area clean and hair-free.

I am a heterosexual female, and I have found that being on the receiving end of rimming is an exquisite pleasure! Digital penetration is enjoyable with a lot of lubricant, and anal intercourse can be pleasurable if I am really relaxed and totally turned on. I had one partner who was too big, though. But average size is ok once in a while.

I have not gotten over my own issues enough to perform any of these acts on a partner, or to even consider it enough to suggest it to them or ask if they are interested in having it done. I would definitely want their hair to be gone before I’d put my face near it!

@CuriosityKills As for the hair issue: when I get a Brazillian wax, they take off everything down there. Both sides.

I do the “brazilian shave” as I call it lol. One day I’ll wax. Maybe when I can tolerate the pain.

I’ve always had anal sex and I’ve always played with my partners (males and females and whomever) anuses and licked them and had them lick mine…I think that, certainly, to each their own and I have been fortunate, imo, to be with people that are VERY open-minded and aren’t grossed out by anything…anal sex feels good, it feels dangerous, like it can hurt me, it feels tighter for my partner, and I like that…when I go down on him, I do anal play with him as well, he loves it…In general, I don’t have anal sex if I know that I need to poop soon just because the thrusting and all that will make me want to poop even more…sometimes yes poop’s on the penis or on the finger, eh, so what, you wash it off…we’re just not about these kinds of worries…we have sex during my period, after workouts, in the shower, whatever…

@Simone_De_Beauvoir: The world needs more people like you.

@MacBean this is true, in more ways than one!

Facade – I so dig you! ;-)

Anal sex, as me giving not receiving, has become an important part of sexual intercourse. It is something that takes time and needs to be “worked in”. If you want to just slam it in and that person is willing but never has before. In most cases. She will never want to do it again. Not a good place to have a bad experience. It’s all about taking your time and fanness.
One of those you cant go back type of things. Another place to play.
I have found if she wont, eventually she will. I do have the skills. ;-)
Also, it is and usually with women that do like it. Understand the importance of keeping it clean. Yes, there can be “situations” from time to time.
But anal sex is a mature sexual act. Comes from two people that are in touch with their sexualness and have left their insecurities at the door.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir there is just something about what most people consider ‘dirty nasty sex’ that is a real turn on. Doing ‘it’ when one or both are all sweaty and such does have a interesting ring to it. Someday, I want to make a mud puddle in the back yard and then the wife and I can roll around like a couple of pigs. =)

@evelyns_pet_zebra yay!

Like @dynamicduo said, a quick shower before hand makes that area just as clean as any other area. If you are doing it orally, you don’t have to stick your tongue all up in there, just around the outside is enough to make me crazy. @prude explained it best. It’s like your being stimulated without direct contact, which just makes you want it even more. For actual penetration the key is to go sloooow and use lube. The feeling is almost unexplainable. You feel full, excuse the graphicness but when your guy is in there and holds still for a minute and you feel him pulse (like a quick throb) holy jesus it’s like amazing. Then you’re begging for him to keep going. I think I also like the dominated feeling, knowing I’m at his mercy, and at the same time I know he is loving it too. It’s an entirely different orgasm for me, stronger. Anal+vaginal+clitoral = merry christmas happy 4th of July and daaaaamn.

@ChazMaz your awesome!
@elijah lol, I sooo agreeeee! (I miss it)

@elijah – I enjoy the way you explain on all your answers and not just here. It helps to understand.

Nobody talked about anal vibrators for men, makes it stay better and fill that soft tunnel…

I licked a girls ass already right after she showered and it was pretty repulsive to me. I wanted to try it because I usually see it done in porno movies and I loved it, especially with the lesbians. It really sparked my curiosity and I wanted to do it, but it really wasn’t as fun as I thought even though her ass was clean ( I know cuz we showered together right before). Curiously though, I ask myself if I would do it again…and surprisingly the answer is yes. I would definitely try it again but I would take a step up some more in terms of ensuring hygiene. To answer the question you posted….there is no logical explanation for a me doing it, for me its just….well…vice. In sex something else takes over that we are not in control of.