OK he's 13 years old and I still tell him bedtime stories. You got a problem with that?
How old does my son need to be before bedtime stories are a thing of the past? I’ll admit the stories have morphed into discussions about the day… Sometimes he’s concerned with world news, troubles, tragedy, of which they talk about in school too.
Just a half hour or so before lights out. He still enjoys me reading to him but now I insist we read to one another, swapping pages and he doesn’t like that as much. I can’t imagine not doing this but one day soon it will get rather corny, don’t you think? If it’s not already…
That day is going to hurt me badly, but I know it’s coming. When do you think it should be?
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I wouldn’t worry too much about it. It sounds like a wonderful father/son bonding time.
My only problem is how to get you to tell me stories or have that sharing time.
@RealEyesRealizeRealLies I tip my hat to you, sir! I think it says a lot about the relationship between you and your son, especially the fact that you make the time to spend with each other and to talk about things affecting your lives. I think too many parents, pressured by the career and economic pressures, let the kids come home, maybe do their homework and/or chores, eat dinner (frequently in front of TV) and then it’s off to bed. As for the reading? My 9-year-old still asks me to read to her at bed time, but I usually get her to read to me instead. Sometimes, I admit, she reads by herself, but I still make sure we spend some time together every day, even if it’s five minutes tossing the frisbee or kicking the soccer ball. Because if I don’t do it, the day is going to come when I will wish I had.
I think it’s actually pretty cool.
He’ll let you know when to stop, I guess, whenever he would outgrow. Seems to me you’re quite a storyteller and have a good relationship with your son.
it’s good that you sit and talk to your kid. and are we still talking “Thomas the Choo Choo” kind of books here or have we moved on to bigger and better things?
@whitenoise @Yetanotheruser
I’m seeing a change in him. We’re best friends in everything, until I enter his school. Crossing that threshold is the moment I cease to exist and he literally looks at me like an alien when around his friends. Growing up sucks!
at least he stopped breast feeding.
The time to stop doing this is when your son no longer wants to.
Hopefully, even when he no longer wants dad to tell him bedtime stories/have bedtime discussions, you will still be able to maintain your tradition of keeping the dialogue open and sharing with each other. It may be on a drive, maybe over ice cream sundaes, and eventually over a beer. It not being at bedtime won’t make it any less special.
@ABoyNamedBoobs03
Well, actually… sometimes we do pull out the old Brio Thomas Train and have a kick with all the memories. But currently he’s most interested in Kant’s Categorical Imperative, Naruto Shipudden and Youtube Smosh videos.
@eponymoushipster
Sure sure, but for some strange reason he’s more infatuated with boobs than ever.
@Likeradar said:
“It may be on a drive, maybe over ice cream sundaes, and eventually over a beer.”
What about a joint? He’s brought up the subject of pot a couple of times recently and wants to know what it’s all about. I have a feeling some experimentation is heading his way. I don’t smoke it, but I don’t want him to think it’s bad and try to hide it from me. I guess teens will always hide experimentation from their parents.
One thing he knows is that I will know if he’s ever stoned. What to do when that happens?
@decorate him with ketchup and whipped cream. when he wakes up….
@RealEyesRealizeRealLies my mother always told me that it’s ok if I tried pot or drinking here and there, as long as I used my head about it. Worked out well for me, but I was the kind of kid that was going to do whatever I wanted anyway, so I think knowing that my mother actually trusted me took some of the edge off of my wild side.
Good advice. I am very grateful that he has the ability to even bring up the subject with me. Your point is well taken.
@ragingloli
Can’t let that go to waste. What would I put on my spam sandwiches?
I would suspect you will stop having your pre-bedtime bonding sessions about the time he moves into his own place. In the meantime, enjoy your son.
I think it is wonderful. Start reading books that you have enjoyed, one chapter each night. I wouldn’t make him read every other page if it is distracting to him. He is probably comforted by the sound of you reading aloud. Maybe take turns each night instead. Don’t stop until he makes you. :)
@RealEyesRealizeRealLies When the subject comes up in conversation, or if he comes home stoned, that will be the time to share your feelings about smoking pot, as well as any experience you’ve had. ~Well, maybe not immediately, if he’s too stoned!~ Judging from his age and your relationship, the “I-hope-you-don’t-but-if-you-do-then-do-it-responsibly” conversation at any time in the next five years.
@Darwin
I don’t know… I’ve told him he can never move out unless I get a key to his place.
Teasing him like that is one of the ways I enjoy my son. He enjoys it too.
@Supacase
That’s right… He does enjoy reading his Manga’s to me. He actually likes all my questions more than anything. Makes him the expert ya know…
i love manga too.
may i recommend “666 satan”?
it is really good
@ragingloli
Sounds like something he’d really enjoy. I’ll check it out!
@RealEyesRealizeRealLies You might want to establish some rules, such as, “no getting stoned at Dad’s house”, or “getting stoned is only allowed at Dads house” or “No dealing…at Dads House” or “if you’re dealing from Dad’s house, Dad gets a cut of the profits~
All worthy of careful consideration… Thanks!
and most importantly “don’t get caught by the cops”
Good advice for everyone.
I think he will let you know when it is time to quit.
I had a sister who was much older than me and had children close to my age. I call her my “magic sister” because she had a way of spending special time at bedtime with every kid in her house and making each kid feel like the most important person in the world. (She had 4 kids.)
I tried to do it with my 3 and they didn’t get to bed until midnight! I don’t know how she dd it, but those are still some of my best childhood memories.
@Likeradar Great answer way back up there. 10 GAs for you. I second all you said.
This question reminds me of the book “Ill Love You Forever”
That’s great that both of you are spending this time together and bonding. It’ll be a lovely thing to recall when he’s out of the house and on his own. Also, you’re insuring that (if and) when he has his own children, you’re passing down this wonderful legacy.
@RealEyesRealizeRealLies I don’t think you have to tell him that joints are bad per se. Maybe you should consider telling him that smoking marihuana during adolescence increases the risk of developing schizophrenia in your twenties. Over all it is good to wait with joints until over 18.
well, this could be a sign of developmental issues. He still clings to you for support and Cade, but at a level that is not healthy fir a 13 year old. You need to start pulling away from him a bit, so he can learn to survive in the world by himself. However, don’t do this to an extreme, or you could cause phsycological damage to him.
Nah…it’s cool. It’s nice you guys are close.
Hell, I’d still love a bedtime story and I am well over 13. Just not from my dad.
Sounds like a commendable father/son relationship to me. I’m sure that you don’t need to be told to relish those precious moments. They really do fly by. My wife and I are at the stage where we are increasingly becoming ‘spare parts’ to our two daughters. It’s corny to say, but where does the time go?
(Picture quivering bottom lip!)
I think it’s great that you read to your 13-year-old. I think it’s great that the 13-year-old wants you to. Believe me! When he’s wants you to stop, he’ll let you know.
hmm maybe I’m just not used to parental love. I quit listening to bedtime stories at 5 years old…. Whatever.
13yr old getting read bedtime stories? I see a future of a 40yr old virgin reading romance novels with you wishing he had a girlfriend
Speaking of Japanese Anime, if you guys are animal lovers, you would enjoy Wolf’s Rain—very poignant in a post-apocalyptic scenario. Most of the episodes can be found on You Tube and elsewhere on the internet.
Heck, even if you aren’t animal lovers, you’d still like it. Artwork is gorgeous, music is great.
Hey that sounds like a swell idea. We own a Wolf hybrid (mixed with German Shepherd). He’ll love Wolf’s Rain, we both will… thanks for the tip!
Wolf’s Rain is awesome. You guys might check out The Road by Cormac McCarthy if you like the post-apocalyptic theme. It’s a story about a father and son.
Sniffling. When my son was 13 he still wanted songs! It’ll end soon enough.
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