Should I tell an old friend that he hurt me in the past?

ugh these things never end well
I don’t know how wise it is to bring up old feelings like that, especially if you’re both married, on the other hand it was twenty years ago…

I’m not familiar with the word chaste, which definition are you using?

Twenty years should have erased the hurt feelings. I would let it go and not let him know that I have thought of this incident for 20 years.

I think you are right, I’ll just leave it alone unless it comes up spontaneously. He used the word chaste to mean not interested in sexual relationship. But still wondering why he ditched me at the dance…

While his behavior was really immature and rude for a college student, it’s so far in the past, leave it there. Hopefully he’s matured in 20 years and will show more consideration during your rekindled friendship now.

I don’t think it’s out of line for you to be wary for a bit, to make sure he no longer behaves badly, but I wouldn’t bring it up.

Thanks for all your thoughtful responses. Now that it’s out there it doesn’t seem to matter as much! Take care.

@Cat13 Good! Maybe all you needed was to air the hurt and be reassured that it was him behaving badly and nothing to do with you.

The mind of a 13 to 25 year old male is crazy place that only uses logic 2 percent of the time. Trust me, we do stupid shit that is regretted when we look back.

I have done the same kind of things and when I am reminded of them I think. “I was such a asshole.” Boys are just stupid.

What benefit do you think could possibly come of telling him?