Professional areas that having a beard might give you a slight advantage?

Ass kisser – yes – It tickles.

Santa Claus: Yes! Real beards are better than fake.

Psychologists and philosophers I think are better off with facial hair (women not included)

Writer

cave man stand in.

Professors

Mad scientist.

You’re an ac-tor and they’re casting for the Captain Lou Albano Story.

Bring your own hair tie!

Programmer. All serious programs are written by men with serious beards.

Circus ~ bearded woman….

Lumberjacks (also needed: plaid)

Any job where it is important that folks think you are “straight”.

Beards (depending on the type) generally imply Intelligence, Wisdom and a general feeling that he knows what he is talking about. So any profession in academia (teacher, professor, scientists, psychologist, etc.) or a position of non physical authority (politicians, judges) are appropriate.

@ragingloli why do beards imply intelligence and wisdom? how did that happen?

You’re an ac-tor and they’re casting for the Ben Finkel Story.

Good looks a must.

Paedophile

… oh wait that’s not a profession

Academia. Especially if you wear a tweed jacket with elbow patches and drink a lot of coffee to show that you mean business.

Prostitute

Rabbi
Orthodox priest
Sikh
Amish guy
Taliban fighter

Sensitive indie singer/ songwriter.

<——Ahem…

Beard model?

An actor who performs in Civil War re-enactment’s.
If you have a receding chin.
You are Santa
Your girlfriend or S/O likes a beard.

Bearded lady.

A beard is a good idea if…

…you hate to shave.
...people tend to think you are effeminate and you don’t like that.
...you live where it is really cold.
...you are a mountain man.
...you need to look older.
...you need to hide a really ugly neck tattoo.
...you hate getting those @#%& shaving bumps.
...you have an unfortunate chin.
...you are a professor at the Charles W. Howard Santa Claus School
...you want to attend SantaCon but don’t want to stick out.
...you want to look like a badass biker.
...you don’t want to be a full time Mormon missionary, a pilot, a firefighter, or an amateur boxer. Did you know it is illegal for amateur boxers to have beards?
...you want to be a sapper in the French Foreign Legion.
...you wish to join the Beard Liberation Front.
...you wish to compete in The World Beard and Moustache Championships.

If you’re Chaz Cher.

<——Ahem…

@ChazMaz
And few realize these are our actual portraits

@SeventhSense . . . you work for coke?

Actually, it is a picture of my butt.

:-)

Also, having a beard would definitely be an advantage if you were being the stand in for The Most Interesting Man in the World.

“Stay thirsty my friends”

A revolutionary.

Che? Beard? Check.
Marx? Beard? Check.
Cleaver? Beard? Check.
Lenin? Beard? Check.
Castro? Beard? Check.
Khomeini? Beard? Check

If you’re a revolutionary, a beard says, “F you! I’m too busy overrunning my country to think about a farkin’ razor! Maybe I have just enough time to bone before my enemies show up.”

@aprilsimnel . . . You forgot Lincoln.

I did, didn’t I? . Well, he just rests my case. He revolutionized to be sure, though, yes, he was duly elected. :D

Strip club bouncer.