General Question

jennyson's avatar

What should I do?

Asked by jennyson (41 points ) January 11th, 2010

I have a few friends I want to invite to my b-day party, but some I don’t want to. But they would be seriously hurt if I didn’t invite them.

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12 Answers

frdelrosario's avatar

No one’s going to “be seriously hurt” for not being invited to your party.

Chikipi's avatar

I agree with @frdelrosarioink I think you might be making a mountain out of a mole hill. If you don’t want to invite them then don’t.

Blackberry's avatar

Lol! Yes…what the first answer said. They will still be alive and I’m assuming you’re in high school so they won’t remember in a year lol.

faye's avatar

Why are they your friends if you don’t want them to come to your party? And, in high school something like that cuts like a knife! Don’t hurt someone’s feelings.

borderline_blonde's avatar

Think of all the presents you’ll miss out on! It’s because you don’t want to share your cake, isn’t it?

I think we need more info. Why don’t you want to invite them? Do the friends on the invite list not get along with them? Personally, I would still invite them to try to spare some hurt feelings, but then I don’t know the whole story, either.

Mrs_Rose's avatar

Have a quick party with everyone, then tell your close friends you wanna have a smaller shin-dig later on. That way no one is left out. If it’s an issue of ‘drama between certain ppl’ let them know the day is not about THEM. If they can’t be mature for one evening thy don’t need to attend.

bigboss's avatar

theyll get over it. just do what makes you happy for your bday.

robaccus's avatar

Put the ones you don’t like in a separate room.

Likeradar's avatar

@faye GA.
Why are you “friends” with people you wouldn’t want at a party?

bigboss's avatar

^^ makes sense. only ppl i wouldnt want at my party are ppl i dont like, ppl i dont like= non friends. _

ultimateego's avatar

don’t invite those you don’t want to. who cares if they get hurt? they’ll recover eventually. unless of course, they commit suicide :)

Fernspider's avatar

Interesting question for this reason:

A friend of ours (my partner and I) is having a birthday BBQ this weekend. She had previously talked about possibly having it around this time when we were at her house chatting one day. I thought of us as friends and my partner is a good friend of her husband.

Today, I received a message on facebook from one of her flatmates (who is also a friend in the group) saying that we should come over on Saturday for “Nancy“s birthday BBQ and drinks.

I felt a pang of hurt that Nancy hadn’t sent me a txt invite. I took it a little personally, thinking “I thought we were friends, not super close friends (because she is the wife of my partners friend, not directly my friend, still friends through the guys though) but we get on well and we went to her wedding etc.” “We visit them from time to time and always have a good time hanging out and chatting. She even asked me if I wanted to be hair model for her portfolio recently.” I stewed on it this morning wondering why we weren’t invited. Certainly didn’t feel comfortable attending on the flatmate’s invitation.

I ended up texting Nancy this morning advising that “Barbara” had invited us over on Saturday and was that ok?”

She replied “Of course, it wouldn’t be the same without you guys.” Nice text to receive but I do feel a little odd now, I mean it is very difficult to say to me “Sorry, I actually wasn’t intending on inviting you. Nothing personal, I just wanted certain friends there.”

Anyway, you are either someones friend or you’re not. Be prepared to realise that a direct “non-invite” can be perceived as a message to others that you don’t like them.

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