Social Question

tinyfaery's avatar

Those born and raised in CA and who love(d) it, did you move away and find a place that you loved and could feel at home?

Asked by tinyfaery (36014 points ) January 22nd, 2010

Please forgive the odd wording.

I was born and raised in So.Cal. I love my state and my city, but if the prop. 8 trial does not go as I beleive it should, the wife and I might consider moving elsewhere, but I don’t know if I could make a home in any other state.

So, have you moved from CA/L.A. to another state and felt like you found a new home? A true home? A place where you love to be, where you feel like you can be yourself and not feel like a freak or an outsider. If so, what do you love about where you live now? Compare it to CA/L.A. if possible.

If I move to another state I need a place where I can marry and have all the same benefits of living in CA. I want a place where I can walk around showing my tattoos and holding my wife’s hand and few will even look twice.

Please do not bash CA or L.A. If you lived here as a child or lived here for a few years, I am not looking for your opinion, I want people who are genuine Californians/Angelenos.

I lived in B.C., Canada for a few months and I loved it, but that choice is not really a possibility.

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20 Answers

Ruallreb8ters's avatar

Ive only ever lived in norther Cali ( were a little differant up here). i could never see myself moving to another state. Ive traveled around the country but always consider cali my home. if i want a change of scenery theres many differant places just in norcal, the bay the foothills, the far north, Tahoe. If your going to leave only because of prop 8 i would think twice for two reasons. one: only a couple of other states that i know of have friendly laws, Mass. is all can think of. two: prop 8 is just the rep. holding on to some false ideal, how it passed (again) in a largly democratic state i still can’t figure out. but it wont last forever.

rockstargrrrlie's avatar

I’m really interested in hearing responses to this- my SO is a native Californian and has lived in both NoCal (where he’s from) and now LA. He said he has never really pictured living anywhere else BUT California, even though he’s not a fan of LA. As I am relocating back East, he now is contemplating moving as well :)

tinyfaery's avatar

@Ruallreb8ters In New Hampshire, Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts and Vermont, marriages for same-sex couples are legal and currently performed.
In Washington, D.C., same-sex marriages could begin as early as February, 2010.

From Wiki.

Ruallreb8ters's avatar

Well there you have it, cold, cold,cold,cold and iowa

CMaz's avatar

I LOVE Florida. But I can get in a New York state of mind sometimes.

susanc's avatar

I don’t know if you’re really committed to living in a legal-marriage state because you think the marriage police will git you in a state that’s not there yet, or what.

But if you choose, say, Olympia, Washington, or Northampton, MA, you’ll be immersed in a culture that will understand, welcome and celebrate you. I suggest Olywa because I like you and I live here.

jeffgoldblumsprivatefacilities's avatar

I have to recommend Colorado. It’s a beautiful state, especially if you are into outdoor activities. The towns of Boulder (town, local environment) and Fort Collins (town, local environment) are beautiful, and have a more liberal, progressive mindset. Both towns have a great culture and many, many activities and events. I bet you’d love them.

While gay marriage still isn’t legal in Colorado (civil unions are), I really hope it will be in the near future.

kidkosmik's avatar

@jeffgoldblumsprivatefacilities +1

I will recommend CO as well. I recently moved from San Diego to Littleton. My wife and I both love the Denver Metro area. Although Denver is nice, Boulder is better known for being more open minded.

tinyfaery's avatar

@susanc I am no longer interested in paying taxes in a state where I am a second class citizen.

AstroChuck's avatar

I was born and raised in Sacramento and it is where I make my home today. Although I’ve never lived outside of California I had looked into moving to Oahu many years ago. There would have been too many sacrifices including loss of senority at my job if I had transferred, not to mention having my pets quarantined upon arrival. Ultimately it was just too cost prohibitive. I may still do so one day when I retire but currently my parents rely on me too much for me to leave them alone in Sacramento.

fundevogel's avatar

I got stuck moving just 45 minutes north of LA and its hell with manicured lawns. I’m living with the people that passed Prop 8.

I’m looking to move back to a city my self, I miss LA but I’d settle for some other modern cultural center. Places like Boston, Baltimore or Chicago would be fine socially I think. I’d just be beatened mercilessly by the weather. Still it’d be better than this little suburban purgatory.

As I understand it no matter the out come of the Prop 8 hearing it will be appealed and sent to the federal Supreme Court where the choice will likely be taken away from the states. Whether or not the Supreme Court would legalize or ban gay marriage is anyone’s best guess. There are too many Republican appointees on the bench for me to be very comfortable.

AstroChuck's avatar

Incidentally, I forgot to mention in my post that I love California.

andrew's avatar

Having lived in Seattle, IL, New England, San Francisco, and LA, I think that the weather is something that you can get used to. It sucks, though. I’m having a really difficult time adjust from LA to Northern California.

Just know that weather is something that, after 3 months, will become much, much less of an issue that you might think right now.

AstroChuck's avatar

@andrew- SoCal has been having shittier weather than we have lately. Plus you don’t have to worry about mudslides.

casheroo's avatar

All I have to say is, DC wouldn’t be a good fit for you. It’s not an enjoyable place to be, in my opinion. Nice to visit, but only in small doses. I don’t know how else to explain it…but I just don’t think you’d like it.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

California was my home from 5yrs old on up and I’ve yet to find another place I love so much as to call it my “home”. If I can’t be in the Bay Area then my “home” remains wherever my heart is.

SuperMouse's avatar

I spent my entire life in Southern California, left when I was 42. I moved to the mid-west and although I am used to it now, I don’t like it as much as So Cal. It took over a year for me to stop wishing I was home and being disappointed every morning I woke up here. I am willing to call it home now mostly because my love and much of my family are here.

I agree 100% with Andrew’s point about the weather; it can be a pain but it is not unbearable by any means. The snow still has some novelty and I have never appreciated, needed, or benefited more from a beautiful day than I do now.

Many people have recommended Colorado as the place for me and since I miss the mountains of So Cal more than I miss the beaches, it is probably where I will end up.

filmfann's avatar

I was born and raised in Oakland, which is right next to Berkeley and San Francisco. Basically, left leaning working class. I love the area, and the culture, and the mostly mild weather.
I just bought a retirement place (still in CA), up near Redding, which is very Right Wing, has no culture, and has four seasons.
I am not sure how I will adjust, but I am looking forward to it.

YARNLADY's avatar

@tinyfaery You might consider living in Windor Canada, where there is no such discrimination I was born in California to a Navy man, raised in Colorado, and returned to live out the rest of my days in California as soon as I was old enough..

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