Social Question

wunday's avatar

When you see something or someone that is very attractive, do you admire or covet?

Asked by wunday (759 points ) January 22nd, 2010

There was a time when I saw beautiful women and I coveted every single one of them. But as some point, this changed to admiration. I no longer felt an annoying desire to have someone who looked fabulous, I could merely appreciate her. I don’t know how this changed, so I’m wondering if other people have experienced this tension, and if they moved from one view to another and if they have any insight into what that is about.

Do you tend to covet more, or admire more? When you covet, how does that make you feel? Have your habits changed over life? What do you think causes either behavior?

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33 Answers

marinelife's avatar

I admire.

Kokoro's avatar

I tend to fall inbetween when it comes to the opposite gender. I don’t care enough to admire or to covet. I’m not a “man crazy” sort of woman. When it comes to beautiful art or items, I have a tendency to admire. I am in love with aesthetics.

CMaz's avatar

I covetly admire.

susanc's avatar

I always admire lovely looking people of either gender. I covet landscapes and buildings. I want to move to every place I visit. I make schemes in my mind to buy houses and keep them rented for all the months of the year when I’ll be in some of my hundreds of other houses. It’s an obsession. I can’t seem to just appreciate them; I want them, I want to paint them different colors, grow more flowers, put up better curtains, make big dinners in their kitchens for all the local friends I would make in no time at all….

kidkosmik's avatar

Covet… If I find myself intensely attracted to someone. This may have to do with people that are your type, that fit your profile for a suitable partner. I can also admire attractive women that are not my type.

I think it all depends on a person’s point of view.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

Admire.It’s always been like that for me.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

I have learned to be content with politely admiring. In the past (years ago) I thought every attractive person who gave me an inkling of interest was an invitation I shouldn’t pass up but age has mellowed me to realize not all is meant for me or good for me even if I can have it.

lloydbird's avatar

A beautiful person is like a beautiful landscape, tree, sunset/rise, cloudscape, song, animal, poem, fragrance, hero/heroine and such like. And should be appreciated and relished.

Caution : Their behaviour might not match their appearance.

aprilsimnel's avatar

It depends. There are plenty of people whose appearance I admire. But there are just some fellows whose looks get the ol’ hormones pumping. Them I covet.

wunday's avatar

@lloydbird Of course, they should be appreciated. The question is—do you appreciate them? Has it always been thus? Or was there a time when you coveted, and if so, how did the change occur.

Val123's avatar

Admire

lloydbird's avatar

@wundayatta I don’t know that I’ve ever felt differently. Beautiful!
However, my caution about the potential mismatch in behaviour has been learnt.

Val123's avatar

O, I just re-read the question.
Person, I admire
Thing, I WANT IT!!!

faye's avatar

I covet objects and relationships, houses, cars, dresses, etc. bitter, bitter

wilma's avatar

@susanc answered just like I would.
It’s the houses. They are not new, and they are not all big, but they have something I want to see or change and I covet the chance to do it.

shadling21's avatar

I admire!
I’ve never coveted… unless the object in question is a computer… <drool>

MissAnthrope's avatar

Usually I admire, along the lines of being able to appreciate beauty in a sunset or a painting or anything else that is visually pleasing. Every once in a while, I covet if I perceive the person to be someone I’d really like to date (based on personality and/or style).

aprilsimnel's avatar

@shadling21, I admire that “kitten in a knit hat” avatar of yours muchly!

Facade's avatar

Probably equal parts of both, especially if the person is naturally gorgeous.

daemonelson's avatar

I tend to do a bit of both. Although, both only really last for as long as I see the person.

RAWRxRandy's avatar

It’s either Envy or Desire for me, depending on how they act.

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

I’ve learned to appreciatively admire that which I cannot have.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Hmm, maybe neither…I do enjoy wondering what some people would be like to seduce (in the case of a couple of ladies on fluther, I do more than wonder..pretty much spend a lot of my time imagining)...

Bluefreedom's avatar

I admire.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife.

LethalCupcake's avatar

I admire…. but them I covet sometimes too – I have to admit the coveting is more satisfying

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@jmah you and I already discussed the three people in question, ;)

Jude's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir apparently for number 3 it’s a no-go. Bummer. ;-)

MissAnthrope's avatar

….? you guys can’t do that, it’s not fair.

MrsDufresne's avatar

I am inspired by beauty. I observe closely, and admire.

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