Can you explain what a healthy intimate relationship is supposed to be like?

I don’t have the least understanding of what a healthy intimate relationship looks like. I can date and hang out and be superficially appealing to men, but when it comes to going any deeper or being more vulnerable or anything like that, I run, because I’m not sure how that’s supposed to work and I think I’m going to mess it up, somehow.

There were no good role models for me as I grew up, no adults taught me what to look for when I was a teen and I’ve had to play by ear thus far. All my relationships have crashed like the Hindenburg. I don’t want to be alone for the rest of my life, but I also don’t know how to be interdependent.

I always feel like I’ll be sucked up dry emotionally if I get involved with anyone, and then I’ll be abandoned when there’s no more use for me, while simultaneously my needs and wants would be ignored. I know intellectually that that’s not true, but my emotional self still feels like this is true.

Jellies in LTR’s, can you help me to understand what makes your relationships work so I’m not so scared to put myself out there?

101 it for me, y’all, as if I were 14.