If you could invent responses to things like burps and sneezes, what would they be?

We say “Excuse me” when we burp or pass gas. “Bless you” is the standard response to a sneeze. Some of the responses to this question got me thinking about socially acceptable responses to uncontrollable bodily functions. We all know how we are expected to respond to these things, but if you could change the accepted response, what would you change it to? What would you have people say after burping or sneezing? What do you wish people would say to someone who burps, sneezes, or passes gas?