General Question

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

MEN: What do you really think of pregnant women?

Asked by Lothloriengaladriel (1542 points ) February 28th, 2010

In my opinion I would assume a pregnant women to be very attractive if she were your wife/girlfriend, and with men being dominant and all I would think maybe even a turn on. What would persuade you to cheat on her while she is carrying your child? have you ever cheated on your pregnant significant other? or have you ever been cheated on while pregnant, and why?

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52 Answers

SABOTEUR's avatar

I’d tell you (drooling), but children visit this site.

DarkScribe's avatar

I don’t think anything special or in any way differently simply because a women is pregnant. My opinion is based on things far deeper than that. Her character, intellect, honesty, humor, reliability.

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

@DarkScribe I assume you don’t have kids.

Cruiser's avatar

I’m not sure being pregnant is really an issue as people cheat whether one is pregnant or not. Baby on board probably has little to do with things.

Mikelbf2000's avatar

I think they are pregnant, what else is there to think. As for cheating. Why would I cheat on someone carrying my child?

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

@Mikelbf2000 yes, why? If the women was there for you, loved you, did anything for you, never cheated, or lied AND is carrying your child, why cheat?

DarkScribe's avatar

@Lothloriengaladriel DarkScribe I assume you don’t have kids.

I don’t know why you would assume that. I have five of my own and two step children – all daughters. I adore them all and am very proud of them. They are bright, intelligent, accomplished and caring. (Just like my wife.) My comments were in response to the question regarding pregnant women, not a pregnant wife. Different response altogether.

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

I might add; this person cheating is a first time father, and he’s 18

CMaz's avatar

They are beautiful, giving me the fuzzy’s all over.

dpworkin's avatar

What moron would admit to this if he did do it?

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

@dpworkin the same moron that answers a question with a question.

HTDC's avatar

“I might add; this person cheating is a first time father, and he’s 18”

Don’t want to be ageist but that explains it.

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

@HTDC just the age factor? or that he is going to be a father?

dpworkin's avatar

@Lothloriengaladriel Oh, you are charming! I hope you never get bored with Fluther.

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

@dpworkin sorry, I’m a bit pregnant this morning.

john65pennington's avatar

I think pregnant women glow. they have a radiance about them and probably the healthiest condition they will ever be in their life. my wife was a tubby butt, when she was pregnant. she was as cute as ever and i babied her from head to toe. cheating? it never happened here and never will.

partyparty's avatar

No I have never been cheated on while pregnant. I wouldn’t be in the relationship now if I had.
But why do you say men are dominant? Relationships should be give and take, a shared friendship. Caring for and about each other. Not one bullying the other.

ubersiren's avatar

I think if a man is going to cheat, he’s going to cheat. Cheaters are selfish and non-commiters, so it doesn’t matter how much their partners are giving, even if it’s 9 months of carrying their own flesh and blood. It probably has little to do with being attracted to her new pregnant body for most people.

Likeradar's avatar

I don’t have any kids and never been cheated on, but here’s what I think FWIW…

An asshole who would cheat on you would cheat on you if you’re pregnant or not.

It seems like (if I have this right), you’re pregnant and being cheated on by your 18 y/o SO. Why are you making it all about the pregnancy rather than the fact that something has clearly gone wrong in your relationship to lead to this point?

Jude's avatar

@Lothloriengaladriel I read your other question and I feel for you, I really do. Your boyfriend sounds like he needs a bit of growing up to do. He’s 18, is an expectant father, and is acting like a child. Being pregnant has nothing to do with it, I don’t think. The “kid’s” an ass.

Do the best that you can for you and your baby. And, leave this loser.

laureth's avatar

18yo boys are horny. They also have most of their brains in their dick at that age. Not all of them, of course – just most. They might not have the sophistication needed to appreciate what they have. Also, a pregnancy means that sex is useless in terms of reproduction at that point – might the biological imperative be to move on and impregnate the next willing girl?

From what I understand, sex is also difficult later in pregnancy, at least mechanically. And I’ve also heard that there are relationship dynamic changes while pregnant (like this) that could cause issues.

Like @jjmah – I read about your situation and I feel for you. It doesn’t sound like your guy’s a real winner. I hope for your sake (and the baby’s) that he grows up fast (unlikely) or that you seek out other options.

syz's avatar

Ahhh, children having children.

CMaz's avatar

“sex is also difficult later in pregnancy”

I am ok with that. As long as I can look, giving me time to toss one off. ;-)

Lothloriengaladriel's avatar

I didnt say I was 18, he’s 18.

Likeradar's avatar

@Lothloriengaladriel How old are you, if you don’t mind sharing?

partyparty's avatar

Do your parents and his parents know just how much you are suffering at the moment?
You shouldn’t feel like this when you are pregnant.
This should be a happy time for you.
I really sympathise.

aprilsimnel's avatar

A person does whatever they choose to do in a given moment. That’s the bottom line. If they didn’t want to do it, and a gun is not being pressed to their head, then they wouldn’t do it. I’m sorry that it’s that bald-faced, but it’s true in the most basic sense. I think you know this as well, and you’re trying to soothe yourself with searching for a reason.

Who cares if he’s “afraid of being a dad”? Who cares if he’s “immature” or “isn’t attracted to you” or “lies to you”? At this point, it’s not on you any more to make him behave the way you want him to. He’s a grown man. He made his choice. You can “should” him all you like, and I reckon you have, and he just goes on and does what he pleases, right?

This young man is cheating on you because he WANTS to. He’d cheat on any woman, the way he is now. You must accept this and do what you have to do ASAP for your sake and that of your child and remove people from your life who are not contributing to it.

Captain_Fantasy's avatar

Dude’s a douche. Simple.
I hope staying with him isn’t an option for you. I really do.

ucme's avatar

Fucking gorgeous. Nipples like chapel hat pegs.Don’t care for the milk though urrgghh!

TLRobinson's avatar

Some people cheat because they can; some people accept it because they can’t (can’t walk away, can’t love themselves more, can’t stand
up for themselves, can’t see a better way, can’t imagine
themselves without the cheater.)

Be mindful your temperment during your pregnancy could impact your childs. You can’t control anyones behavior but your own; trying to do so will leave you feeling confused.

When you know better, you do better. YOU CAN DO BETTER…

davidbetterman's avatar

They are incredibly beautiful in the pregnant condition. I am just amazed that there is a little baby inside of them. Now that I know some of the discomfort and near-torture that women go through to carry the little child I am especially impressed at their courage and fortitude.
I take my hat off to pregnant women and say, “Keep up the good work, mom!”

partyparty's avatar

@davidbetterman Ahhh that is such a lovely answer

Sarcasm's avatar

For what it’s worth, I’m a single 20-year-old boy without any children.

I don’t think a pregnant body is ugly.
But I just can’t bring myself to imagine sexual intercourse with a pregnant woman. I know people are going to point out that the baby’s safely hidden. But just the idea of having a baby growing up in there when I’m.. no. I can’t do it.

But even with that, I would not cheat. I am a respectable human being. I can handle not having sex until the baby is out and she feels ready again.

I also say this as a guy who plans to not have kids anyway.

Likeradar's avatar

And, for what its worth even though it doesn’t answer your question, I also think it’s interesting that you’re focusing on how you look, and if men are sexually attracted to pregnant women. What about the emotional side of the situation?
I’m not excusing his behavior at all, but he is about to become an 18 year old father. He’s still a kid. Maybe the responsibility, financial burden, stress and fear of the future is why he’s acting irresponsible and looking for freedom?

Arisztid's avatar

Quite a few things, actually.

“Thank the Gods it is not mine.” I was snipped in the 80’s when I decided that I did not want children.

As far as thinking a pregnant woman is attractive vs. unattractive, it depends on the woman like they are when they are not pregnant. Some women are absolutely strikingly beautiful when pregnant, some are not.

That being said, I do not think I could have sex with a pregnant woman when she is seriously showing. I know that I would not damage the baby or her but that is what my mind says. My emotions say “oh Gods what if I hurt her or the baby?” I know that most women can have sex safely well into their pregnancy but my emotions would say “No!” I am also the sort of guy that, despite my field of employ, is always afraid of “breaking” a baby if I touch one.

Another thing, having worked in the medical profession for decades, that goes through my mind is just doing a check over for some signs of eclampsia and pre-eclampsia and wishing the baby and mother luck. I have done a few shifts in the NICU (in a low capacity) and have seen things there that will live with me forever.

I also have passing thoughts that I hope she has not used drugs or alcohol during pregnancy and that, if she does not, she and her child does not have bad luck in the birth lotto. I know too much of the variety of horrific genetic disorders and birth defects ( Harlequin type ichthyosis for just one out of only the Gods knows how many) and the effects of drug and alcoholic use on the fetus. Refer to “having done a few shifts in the NICU”... the effects of these things are heartbreaking and devastating.

I hope that she has a good man to be the father and, if a lesbian, a good woman to be co-mother (whatever that is called). If not, I hope she has a good support system if she is to raise it alone.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I think a person can cheat on a pregnant partner because they’re scared about the baby and the responsibility. Especially if they’re not mature.

Seek's avatar

Having read both your questions in their entirety, I have to wonder -

If you were raised to believe you need a man to be the head of your family, etc…

why the hell are you breeding with a child of 18? You’re a 24 year old woman dating a guy who probably still has to be told to bathe on a daily basis (if he’s anything like my younger brother and his idiotic friends). Not exactly the shining example of the family patriarch.

It seems to me you’ve made a few pretty poor judgements: moving in with his parents for one. Nothing like throwing yourself at the mercy of a hormonal teenager’s whim.

My only advice is to get the frak out of there with a quickness. Hopefully you can either repair things with your parents, or become an adult and get a place of your own. And stop sleeping with children and expecting them to be faithful, responsible adults.

PacificRimjob's avatar

They tire more quickly when fleeing.

stardust's avatar

@Lothloriengaladriel I think the reason a guy would cheat in this stage is down to fear. Parenthood is a huge responsibility and at 18, I imagine the most guys aren’t overly emotionally mature

ubersiren's avatar

@Sarcasm Chances are your opinion will change about that, especially if you fall in love with a woman and end up having kids with her. ;) There’s nothing wrong with you if you don’t change your opinion, but never say never!

ptarnbsn's avatar

@seek Kolinahr Thanks for stating what I have been thinking all along!

ptarnbsn's avatar

@Seek_Kolinahr Thanks for stating what I’ve been thinking all along!

JeffVader's avatar

Physically, I actually find pregnant women slightly creepy. I’ve never understood the whole ‘glowing’ comment, isn’t that just the effects of throwing up alot? That being said I’m not a parent & if things go as planned I wont ever be. Perhaps it’s different when it’s your partner…

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@Cloverfield I’ve never vomited during any of my pregnancies and I had the ‘glow’ because I was so damn happy.

JeffVader's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir & I’m sure it helped being as cute as a button too :)

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@Cloverfield well, now, don’t try to change the subject, :)

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@jjmah well this is just terrible but awesome on a Monday morning – thanks, beautiful

JeffVader's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir Hehe, you’ve no-one to blame but yourself for this one ;)

sleepdoc's avatar

I would say that were I to be tempted (not that I would do this) I would be tempted to cheat with a pregnant woman while the lover was not. Does that make me strange?

Lellismommy27's avatar

If he is willing to cheat on your when you are carrying a part of him that should seal the deal. Be done with his sorry ass things will not get better they will just get worse. You’re 24 therefore you should be capable of being fine with him due to the fact you should be much more mature ;). I do however give you sympathy because that could not be a good feeling at all. You just need to pick up where you’ve left off before him and move on with your life and be the best mom you can be to your child. He sounds like a dumbass and he probably won’t grow up for awhile.

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