General Question

whothei0's avatar

How do i ask a girl to be more than just friends?

Asked by whothei0 (213 points ) March 2nd, 2010

i know this is a reoccurring theme but none of the other ones fit my circumstances.
she and i are good friends, both part of the same group of friends and some of the same clubs and many of the same interests. i have asked her to the movies before but she has taken it as more of friends hanging out, because her family goes to the movies all the time, for may family we almost never go to the movies. i have even tried the meal before the movie trick. so how do i tell her that i would like to try being more than friends?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

18 Answers

janbb's avatar

There is the plain old come out and say, “Would you like to go out with me?” or “I’d like to be more than friends” method.

Cruiser's avatar

Asking her is a good start and then you can show her your new tattoo of her name and face.

kevbo's avatar

Stop being her friend.

It’s not always true, but when it comes to girls it is much more difficult to from friend to something more. For future reference, next time you are interested in a girl make it clear that you are interested in “that way” rather than just a friend.

Well, normally the way to test the waters is to flirt and see how she responds. In this case, you’ll probably have to finesse a direct approach as folks above have suggested. Chances are she doesn’t think of you that way or she doesn’t want to ruin the friendship. So, if you’re serious then you’ll have to set about changing her mind about you and/or dismantling the friendship some so that it’s ruined enough to allow room for a relationship.

I don’t make the rules, by the way.

You might get lucky, though, and find out she has similar feelings, but I doubt it.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

Give her a smooch and see what happens ;)

drClaw's avatar

Whip it out.
.
.
.
.
.
I’m talking about a flower. Get your mind out of the gutter!

Captain_Fantasy's avatar

Once the f word (friend) comes out, keep walking. The fact that you’ve asked her out and she brought friends is proof of this. It’s not that she doesn’t know you want to date. She knows.

ChaosCross's avatar

Walk up to her, bring her aside, and tell her that you think you love her.

SO ROMANTIC AND DIRECT!

stardust's avatar

Tell her :)

gorillapaws's avatar

DON’T use the Justin Timberlake dick-in-a-box technique.

stardust's avatar

But don’t take all year!

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

Take her hand in yours and look her in the eyes.
Tell her how you feel about her and what she means to you.
Explain to her the just being her friend does not allow you to fully express your love for her.
Ask her to go out with you on a date. Ask her to give it a try and see where things go between to two of you.

shalom's avatar

Write her a note, not more than 1 page,double-spaced to tell her how you feel. No email though. Say you want to be more than friends. That way you give her some time to think about it and get back to you without putting unnecessary pressure on her.

pinkgirl02's avatar

just be honest with her because thats the only way forward just say what u feel its not a crime

Aster's avatar

Yeah, she knows. If she wanted more you’d know it by now.
Don’t write anything down; she’ll read it out loud to her girlfriends!!!

crazyivan's avatar

Hate to say it, but Aster is right. If you’re already friends it is too late. If you tell her that you want to take the relationship to the next level, you risk losing a friend.

All those subtle hints you’ve been giving off, you know, the one where you make excuses to be a little closer to her, etc? She’s noticed them and she’s being polite. If the feelings were reciprocal you’d already know it.

Joybird's avatar

I just hate it when men ask me if they can be more than friends. But that’s just me. I have a strong preference for a man confident enough to make the attempt to plant a wet one on me and accept whatever comes next…either a yay or a nay. Really, an attempt at a kiss on the lips pretty much spells out where you stand. Either they will kiss you back or be taken aback and set you straight.

gorgeousgal3's avatar

Don’t wait a long time before you say anything because she might start dating other people if she thinks your ’‘just friends’’.Let her know how you feel and be romantic. Don’t be foolish by trying to be someone your not because she’ll see right through it.

gorillapaws's avatar

@Joybird it’s called sexual assault if the girl doesn’t want to be kissed and involves going to jail and then having to register as a sex-offender for the rest of your life. In this day-and-age it pays to be cautious.

Answer this question

Login

or

Join

to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
or
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther