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wundayatta's avatar

What does it mean to be whole?

Asked by wundayatta (58367 points ) March 9th, 2010

This is a companion question to this. Wholeness seems to be a psychological term about a more complete way of being human, or of being psychologically healthy enough to participate in a healthy relationship.

What does it feel like? How do you know when you are whole? Do you go in and out of it? What happens to change your sense of wholeness? What does wholeness mean?

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20 Answers

YoH's avatar

For me it means to be at peace with myself. It means I am relaxed with my world and nothing can take it from me because I cherish it so.

CyanoticWasp's avatar

Integrated, obviously. Otherwise I’d be fractional or decimal.

stump's avatar

To me, wholeness means feeling the connection between the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual aspects of my being. There may be things I lack, but feeling how everything fits and flows together makes me feel whole.

Jude's avatar

Accept and love myself, warts and all. Inner peace.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I agree with @YoH. It means I can handle anything that comes my way. And yes sometimes I don’t feel whole.

kess's avatar

One becomes whole when His duality become One- the perfect unity.

Since we are a mixture of negatives and positives in random alignment, we are incapable of being that truly positive One for we of ourselves undermine our own good purpose.

Thus we must first go through the period of separating the positive from the negatives.

When they are fully seperated, they both will be recombined but in perfect aligned as One and each serving it’s own Good Purpose.

Jesus said it like this,

when the eye be single the whole body is full of light…

As long as we see somethings as good and some as evil, we are have a duality of vision.

Wholeness is having a single vision for good in all things.

ModernEpicurian's avatar

I’d say that it means knowing ones self.
I would say that I didn’t feel whole until I had read and delved deeply, into my own philosophies, understanding what I want and why it means anything to me.

I would say that, once you have achieved a state where you are happy and have a deep knowledge of self, then you are truly whole.

mattbrowne's avatar

Self-actualization refers to fulfilling ones individual potential. It gives you inner peace. It makes you whole.

Ria777's avatar

you defined well enough in the second sentence. hey, though, @wundayatta, analyzing and pondering doesn’t help, beyond a certain point. beyond that point doing those things get into an exercise in procrastination.

I would like to say that rather than you have here degrees rather than absolutes. so, relatively integrated rather than somewhat integrated.

anyway, like I said, @wundayatta, I think you have a good grasp on this if you can define it.

I will just pop ‘round your other thread with my idea of how to help with self-integration.

gemiwing's avatar

The day I knew I was making progress towards being whole was amazing. It brought me to tears.

I sat alone in a room with no noise and felt comfortable. No negative thoughts, no distractions, no unease- just peace. I was happy being alone with myself.

wundayatta's avatar

Wow, @gemiwing! I can’t begin to imagine.

Just_Justine's avatar

I am not sure that “being whole” is a goal one arrives at. One might find wholeness for a time. Because with new changes in our lives, like jobs, careers, kids growing up, major age milestones our equilibrium is shifted. Then we begin the whole process of re balancing to our new circumstances. Losing a leg could cause are prior identity to be shattered until we once again accept our lives with one leg. In terms of relationships I used to be a rampant co-dependant. I seem to have swung in the opposite direction. But I certainly don’t need a “partner” to feel whole. I have had in the past delightful friends that have contributed to my wholeness. I think that wholeness could be linked in some way to balance. Spiritual time (of whatever your belief system is) family time, a time for work, a time for rest. A time for fun. I am very content being alone. Perhaps too much so. Although I am finding enjoyment in other people again. For me at this point to be whole would be to seek out that, which makes me authentic. I have given up to much of what I love to do, in order to survive.

davidbetterman's avatar

It means you are not co-dependent.

Family secrets. Guilt. Shame. Repressed anger. Low self-esteem. Compromising your own values to avoid another person’s rejection or anger. Those are just a few red flags of codependence.”

MorenoMelissa1's avatar

Being whole means being secure with your emotional and psychological self.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

In simple terms, being whole means that my outsides match my insides.

Your_Majesty's avatar

When you get everything you desire/want.

CaptainHarley's avatar

To me it means being centered… to know who you are and to be comfortable with it. In my own life, it seems to come more often with age and experience, although there is certainly no reason “being whole” can’t be experienced by the very young. Being centered means there is a core of unalterable mentation ( including experiences, values, beliefs, personal image, etc. ) to which you can return time after time, rather like “home port” in a storm.

YARNLADY's avatar

I wouldn’t use that term, because there is no opposite, such as half or unfinished, but I believe you might mean without yearning. I got over that when I got over the sudden loss of my first husband. I was a zombie for nearly a year, with only my baby to keep me sane, and gradually I came back, but without any expectations. I made my happy pledge, and that works for me.

snapdragon24's avatar

To be whole is someone who can give oneself endlessly, and when taken for granted or abused or betrayed by others there is something about them that doesn’t give up and keeps on going and love people just the same. Someone full of energy and life who can fullfill oneself without the help of others. A starfish, no matter how many times you cut off their legs…it grows back on.

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