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Finley's avatar

What would be a great article to write for our school's april fools newspaper?

Asked by Finley (833points) March 23rd, 2010

I need something funny, ridiculous, and fake. Help I’m not creative (articles involving teeth/dentistry would be extra great)

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23 Answers

LuckyGuy's avatar

Health care bill passed and signed into law. Nobody has been sick since.
Hospitals are considering closing. Insurance companies are refunding unused health care premiums and Rush Limbaugh has nothing to talk about.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

Scavenger hunts are always fun. Let’s say, a scavenger hunt based around a years worth of trouble free teeth. The object they hunt for turns out to be a set of Billy Bob Teeth.

jealoustome's avatar

School Unveils New Dual Degree Program: Dentistry and Podiatry. “Students lucky enough to be accepted into the program will be able to treat their future clients from head to toe…”

ragingloli's avatar

War Criminal arrested. Bush to be hanged tomorrow noon.

noyesa's avatar

Students Being Forced to Read Communist Manifesto at Gunpoint to Avoid Death Squad Wrath in Fallout of Healthcare Bill.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

@ragingloli And they’re auctioning off his teeth!

shego's avatar

Orthodontists, claim that braces will be removed from the mouth of every child.

malevolentbutticklish's avatar

@Finley: Write an article about how it is possible for school administrators to turn on female student’s laptop cameras while they are home in their bedroom.

snowberry's avatar

An article about a cordless drill serial killer.

ucme's avatar

Cavity depravity.Local dentist asks “is it safe“before terrorising his patients.Police say they are filling out their enquiries & ask the community for their co operation at this time.

lilikoi's avatar

Health care reform bill is killed by the senate.

Dr_C's avatar

“This just in: House Republicans vow to use logic and common sense in voting for or against bills, as well as taking into account the best interest of the people instead of special interests and blocking dems”

autumn43's avatar

‘At tooth hurty (2:30) there will be a National Flossing Event on the front lawn to see if we can break the World Record of having the most people flossing teeth at once. Dental hygienists will be on hand to check flossing techniques.’

whyigottajoin's avatar

@Finley lol you have a perverted mind O_o!

msbauer's avatar

oh oh go all “War of the Worlds” on them…aliens invading los angeles and d.c.!

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

And they want our children’s baby teeth and are holding the Tooth Fairy hostage!

msbauer's avatar

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies well obviously, since teeth are the legal tender of most alien planets

whyigottajoin's avatar

Holy shit I didnt mean @Finley I ment @malevolentbutticklish has a perverted mind!
(How does one edit answers after a few days? lol O_o!)

Finley's avatar

Two things I forgot to mention..

1. I have the most conservative editor for a teacher and wouldn’t even let us print anything about death much less perverted things… He won’t even let us write opinions because he’s afraid of sexual inuendos and we’ll be too open-minded.

2. Health Care Reform Bill is great but we have to save that for after April Fools and my school (which is private) lives in a gated hell hole of a community where nobody cares whats going on in the outside world (esp. government and politics)

malevolentbutticklish's avatar

@Finley: “gated hell hole” <== why do you say this? Non-gated communities are often worse.

Finley's avatar

@malevolentbutticklish Not to be rude, but I don’t want to get into that, I’m talking about my school newspaper right now.

whyigottajoin's avatar

@malevolentbutticklish Woeps, I missed that news! Unbelievable! O_o! Correction; administrators in that school have a sick mind!

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