My boyfriend and I don't match, but we love each other, should I stay or should I go?

What should you do? Why ask someone who knows neither of you. If I suggest that you run around your back yard screaming like chicken – would that help? It is about as useful a suggestion as I could possibly make based on the data available to me.

You could talk to him about the differences and fights and see what comes of that.

Only time will tell for this one, maybe when you guys are older you will be able to discover yourselves more and know what you really want. I know what it is like to want to be with someone when you know you really don’t go together.

Welcome to Fluther my fellow Jelly, and best friend! =D Great to have you on the site!

If both of you can’t overcome your differences then you better ask him just to be your friend(at least you can still in good relationship with him). Time to move on. There’s still other much better fish in the sea,you just haven’t caught it yet. So,get dress up and get your fishing equipment.

there are soooooo many people to come that you’ll love and then get over. move on. it’ll be ok. someone awesome is out there just waiting to get to know you.

Stay, opposits attract.

It’s OK to not match. If you and him can both be secure at the exact same time, and just do your own things, then coming back to each other for love and comfort… then do so. You probably shouldn’t spend idle time with him. He shouldn’t be used in place of a normal girl friend, which you really need if you keep this guy.

But if you always fight? Break up.

If you don’t share common interest you run the risk of being left out or resenting the others interests and activities that may then take up good chunks of time and or money. Then one of you will meet someone else while doing your own thing and you would eventually break up anyway. Get it over with now!

Ah so you Clash.If you stay there may be trouble, if you go there may be double ;¬}

I would go.Life is too short :)

Give it another month or two. In the meantime, make a list of 10 things that you absolutely MUST have in a relationship and also 10 things that you absolutely CANNOT stand in a relationship. See how he matches up to what you feel you want based on the lists.

Why force what doesn’t fit?

The fighting often thing makes me really want to say move on. There’s really no reason to put yourselves through that, it’s likely not making either of you any happier. If it was me I’d probably move on, as a milder approach you can always stay a bit longer and see where it takes you, but be prepared for the same results.

You need to realize that you have a long life ahead of you for only being 19. 2 months isn’t that of a time, but if you questioning if you match right now, you will probably be questioning it later on in life if you stay with him.

I believe there is a perfect person out there for everyone, and when you meet them, you will know!

@slick44 Yes but the differences are that I want to do lots of fun stuff, for example going out to dinner and to the cinema and cruising. But he doesn’t like cinema, cruising or going out for dinner..I’ts so boring, but I’m used to the affection and love and comfort he can give me.

@Eleonora If you are only two months into the relationship and you don’t like how much he is willing to go out, that will only get worse with time. Based on your vast differences in interests, I think you should break up. You can’t be that used to the affection and comfort after only two months. You need to find someone more compatible.

Two months? You need to move on if it isn’t working.

I have to question how much you love each other if it’s only 2 months and you fight a lot.

you should stay and see what comes of it. No two people are exactly alike. Love is what its all about.

Try not to fight alot though, tension is never good.

@Captain_Fantasy Well, we are together every day, and we love to cuddle,but i’m in a good mood every day and then when I come up with an idea he rejects every time and we can’t discuss beacuse he always give lazy answers like: Mhh..Oke or sure…mm what ever.. im so getting angry of that it happens all the time.

@Eleonora If you truly love and trust each other, then you can solve problems constructively. It doesn’t have to be one way or another. He can stay home, and you can go out. If he trusts you (and you trust yourself) that’s not a problem. Or you could find another solution you can both live with. Perhaps he agrees to go out more and you agree not to complain or whatever.

If you have a sense of humor about your disagreements, you can have a fine relationship. If you keep on resenting him and it gets worse and you think about the bad stuff all the time, your relationship is not long for this world.

Comfort and affection go a long way. But if they don’t allow you to constructively problem solve, they aren’t enough.

Doesn’t sound promising.

Take a spoonful of whatever potion is the easiest to swallow.
Fire & ice, oil & water….kerosene & a torch.

My short answer:
If he treats you with respect and love, and you treat him the same, you should stay.

If you have different interests you can take it as a good thing! You can learn from eachother instead of fighting or arguing about stuff. You can find this as a good opportunity to try new things. Maybe it’s th kind of music you guys like or movies, whatever it is keep an open mind and you can discover things you like, things that he likes and you can enjoy them together. Sometimes someone who has the same interests as you can get boring and get old fast. If he treats you right an you guys live eachother then you can find a way to work it out. But you have to be open minded

Forgot mention that it’s not a one way street. He has to take you seriously and work with you to. If not reconsider is it more a physical thing for him or does he appreciate you too

@eleonora He sounds like a bore. The things you want to do are cool. You’re a pretty girl so no doubt you should be easily able to find somebody you can enjoy these things with.

I think it’s fine to not have two people “match” in a relationship. My husband and I are virtually polar opposites, and we get along great.

My greater concern is that you are only two months into this relationship and already the honeymoon is over? That would be a deal breaker for me. If I’m “often” fighting with someone two months into it, how will it be in a year? Or worse, 10 years?

I say stay until your sure it won’t work. You don’t want to be left wondering or regretting. But thats just my opinion, I don’t know.

@Eleonora… Maybe you could make a deal, he do something with you that you like, and vise versa. you never no you might both enjoy yourselves.

Time will tell. Really, two months isn’t nearly enough time to know that you’re “really” in love.

Follow your heart.

I question your use of the word “love”. Also the idea that you “can’t live without each other”. Sure you can. You managed it for the first nineteen years of your life.

@Trillian I’d really, really hate to be with a guy I “couldn’t live without.” It would be even worse to be with a guy who said he couldn’t live without me. Talk about feeling trapped!

This is a tough one. If you go there will be trouble. If you stay it will be double.

At 19 turmoil is part of the love package.

@Blondesjon Well? come on and let me know…

Should I go or should I stay. Hmmm….I feel a song coming on. I’m a professional song writer, you know.

@Val123 Great point on feeling trapped…..isn’t it the truth.

@plethora Been there. It was awful.

How’s the sex?

Opposites attract

@SeventhSense haha, there is no sex after 2 months, I just can’t do that after 2 months when I’m not sure about him. im too carefull with myself for that.

@slick44 well, he does´nt do anything, we only staying at home or he is with some friends doing nothing..and i come up with many ideas and he always rejects..so boring,he is very boring, im bored all day

Drop that zero, and get you a hero :)

Yup, sounds like you need somebody with more get up and go about them.

So here we are @Eleonora 15 months later – and you are finally active here again. Bring us up-to-date will ya? Did you stay or did you go now?

im 24 now hes already past after 1 month i posted that question