How likely is it that a friendship might survive, or even thrive, between an atheist and a Jehovah's Witness?

I have a close long term friend who is a JW and we get on very well. I met him when he knocked on my door twelve years ago and that day he stayed for seven hours. He and his wife now socialise with my wife and me and although we sometimes have religion oriented discussion, there is no proselytizing and no angst.

you have the ability to make or break that barrier. If they are folk you like to be around, do it. Dont judge them first. Get to know them. It wont hurt you.

Love your neighbor as yourself.

we all eat, play in the park…..religion doesnt have to be the focal point. Go bowling.

2 of my best friends are Atheists, while I grew up Southern Baptist. WIth one friend in particular, we’ve had lengthy, hours-long discussions where we allowed each other poke, prod, and check under the proverbial hood of our beliefs. It was amazingly refreshing for both of us to be able to explore all we wanted without fear of conversion or damning judgements. But, too, the chemistry has to be there, or the friendship won’t exist, anyway.

My sister is a committed atheist. Her husband, and father of her child, is a Jehova’s Witness.

They get along just fine; I’m sure you can too.

I do not see why this friendship cannot flourish.

I will be surprised if they do not continue to at least attempt to give you a copy of the latest Awake magazine.

Jehova’s Witnesses can be subtly pesky.

But at the the same time, they are to be commended for who they are. During Hitler’s Germany, they peacefully resisted Hitler, refusing to cooperate in some things. Many of them were rounded up and imprisoned or killed along with Jews and other groups.

They are friendly, which contributes to the ability to befriend them.

Its probably just instinctive them jumping up to give you leaflets. To them its the absolute truth and answer to all their questions and fears in the world. Therefore it is not surprising that they would want to share that enthusiasm with you. Maybe they are not alwways thinking about converting people. Maybe they genuinly like you and thought they would share their joy and belief with you because its so important to them they wanted to show part of them to you. They could also be brainwashed into only focussing on converting people but hey why not be friends. Tell them that you feel uncomfortable with the handing out of leaflets and any ideas of conversion but you enjoyed the rest of the evening and hope that you can build on that and perhaps they might like to come to your house. Be really clear but kind and there should be no misunderstanding. If they continue to try and push their religion onto you with a view to convert you then either pull away gently (your dont want a war with your neighbours over it) or just for the fun of it enjoy the challenge of trying to convert them to your beliefs :) Dont let it get in the way for you of what could be a nice friendship (handy to to have your neighbours on good terms – they can feed the cat when you go away etc or hold your spare key incase you get locked out)

I do know how annoying it is to have leaflets waved in your face though. There is a women on the bus route I take and if we end up on the same bus she befriends me then thrusts a leaflet in my hand last minute as she is about to jump off or on the bus. I wonder if she realises I am the same person she is talking to each time???? Maybe she is just hell bent on giving out those dam leaflets that they dont look the person in the eye and get to know them…... mmmm that could be what could happening with your neighbours but I doubt it I mean everyone needs friends. The wider the variety of people in your life the more interesting your memories and connections.

As long as your friends’ assurances that they are interested in friendship rather than converting you prove to be accurate, then of course you can have a long happy friendship.

If they kind of forget themselves and begin prosetylizing without you asking them any questions about their beliefs, simply remind them about THEIR OWN previous statement.

Not all JWs are totally brainwashed into the need to convert every single person they encounter.

One of my best long term friends is a Hare Krishna devotee and it doesn’t interfere with our friendship at all. But this is due to the fact that she is a mature person in this belief and not a recent convert so has seen firsthand the futility of buttonholing everyone to convert them.

Hare Krishnas are the ones who could frequently be seen accosting people in airports back in the sixties and seventies btw. Brilliantly satirized in the movie “Airplane”. Funny stuff.

New converts to anything (even ex-smokers) can usually be really annoying to deal with because they are still in that fervor of newfound discovery and belief.

My friend and I have had many long fruitful discussions and comparisons of our differing belief systems without any of the stresses and strains that usually accompany such things.

But that’s due to the fact that we both recognize that each person has their own unique path to tread in life and that our own chosen path may be completely wrong for someone else. Basically we have a mutual respect for each others rights to believe or not believe whatever.

There was only one brief time when she slipped as we were discussing the vegetarian aspect of things and was getting a bit stridently arm-twisty about it. I simply reminded her about our basic ground rules of mutual respect for each other’s belief and that was enough.

(as a side note to this: I had always avoided cooking meats whenever we were together because even the smell of it was offensive and I could understand that completely. We always picked restaurants with vegetarian options whenever we ate out as it certainly didn’t do me any harm to eat more healthfully for a brief time.) That was something that I chose to do because of mutual respect and I didn’t mind at all.

Anyhow, as long as your JW friends really meant what they said and accept you as you are with no hidden agenda to change you, I don’t see any reason why a long term deep friendship wouldn’t be possible.

It all hinges upon mutual respect. Just make sure that you and your hubby can resist the urge to talk them out of their “religious delusion” I don’t see any problems.

Perhaps eventually all of you can have some interesting discussions if you desire. If not, there are surely many other aspects besides religious beliefs that can be areas of connections for all of you.

I think if they told you that, then they meant it. I think they liked the both of you and were really looking forward to being friends. Of course they had to give it that old college try. So long as it doesn’t bother you. I would just also avoid political topics like, right to life issues.
Hell, political issues in any friendship can always be a slippery slope.

A JW without the missionary zeal should be okay.

Now that you both know where you stand on that subject, try to never bring it up again; neither one of your has any intention of changing. Respect each others differences and build a friendship on the things you can agree upon. It is not their place to judge you or your place to judge them. It’s when we judge that trouble starts.

Most people are the same as anyone else when they are not discussing the issue of religion. If you know an issue is divisive but you would otherwise be friends, it is quite easy to just avoid that topic of discussion. I successfully avoid discussing religion with my family every day.

Sure why not? I would be prepared though to be further exposed to their devoted ways and to be invited to their religious activities. If you can get past that and allow them their faith, you should get along swimmingly!

I’m an atheist and one of my best friends is a youth minister at a “super church”. Unlike many religious people I know, he loves to talk about the difficult questions regarding his faith. Our conversations on religion usually revolve around the others perspective. He wants to know how a “good” person can go through life without any faith, and I try to find how a highly intelligent person can accept things on faith alone. I don’t treat him like an idiot for his beliefs, and he doesn’t tell me I’m damned for the lack of mine.

Plenty of my friends have beliefs that differ from mine. We either don’t talk about religion at all or discuss it without trying to convert the other. For example, I have a friend who is Sikh and, whilst I am not Sikh and have no plans to convert, I am very interested in her religion. I can easily ask her questions without fear of being preached to and she can do the same to me about my beliefs. We also have enough other subjects to talk about. If your conversation can flow without religion coming up or when religion does come up it isn’t awkward or preachy then there should be absolutely no reason why you can’t have a very good friendship. They have already said they aren’t interested in trying to convert you so, fingers crossed, now that they know where you stand on the subject, it won’t be an issue.

It does not. If the Jehovah’s Witness is faithful to the faith.

If there was no proselytization and it didn’t seem like their religion was harming anyone else directly, I think it is possible to maintain a friendship, so long as there are enough other things that interest you about each other. My problem is being friends with people who believe things that harm our society. If they actively support these ideas, I can’t imagine being friends with them. So if the JWs were doing something like opposing health care legislation, or being anti-choice, or anti-government, then I’d have a big problem. I don’t like associating with people who are advocating for policies that actively harm others, in my opinion.

If both are smart sensitive people they can be friends.

Save a friendship??? My dad and his only surviving sister do no speak anymore due to the same situation, and not because of my dad, is just that her and her family are: my way or my way >I

@jazmina88 An interesting point you make about self-imposed barriers.
@phillis You’re certainly right about the chemistry – friendship is often more about instinct and feeling than shared beliefs.
@the100thmonkey Excuse my ignorance, I thought JWs married within their religion.
@wundayatta I have no real idea how their beliefs affect their feelings to policy. We are talking about JWs in South Korea – a relatively new branch of religion out here – and I confess I don’t know how or if it differs largely from JWs elsewhere.

Thanks to everyone for sharing your experiences and thoughts.

In case anyone is interested in an update, we had dinner together and got along very well. There was only one slight diplomatic incident involving my son, a mobile phone and a fish bowl. If we’re never invited back, it won’t be anything to do with the pamphlets!

did anything die because of it??? :)

No! I haven’t heard back from them though, so it’s possible the phone did not survive!

hahahahaha!!! :) Oh their phone, then it’s fine