Social Question

Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

Anyone here miss their dad? (or anything about their dad)

Asked by Vincent_Lloyd (3007points) July 14th, 2010

sigh Just asking since me and my friend are talking about our fathers that left us… For those out there that don’t have a dad. I can share your guy’s pain. I miss my dad. He hasn’t visited me in over a year or so (maybe longer) hasn’t called for about the same time. But I do look at what could have happened from what my mom has said about him… Seeing her get abused and what not…The police coming over for some reason…I miss my dad ,but don’t since of what the outcome could have been. For everyone, did your dad abandon you at my age or even a little baby? Does it ever hurt you to realize that your friends have dads that will do father and son bonding or go fishing?....Just to say it all…It hurts me.

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27 Answers

YARNLADY's avatar

I was raised by both my Mom and my Dad. They passed on in 1984, when I was 41 years old, but I still miss them.

Cruiser's avatar

My dad is still alive but 1100 miles away and I barely get to see him but once a year. I miss his laugh, his piano playing and mostly him seeing his grand kids.

AliasTJ's avatar

Yes I miss everything about my Dad. He died last August. He had a wisdom all his own. He had little sayings about life that we called Tedism’s. He also had a tremendous knowledge bank of random facts in his head. I miss talking to him every day and sharing any new Big Foot or alien stories with him that I come across. He had a presence that is missed by many.

gemiwing's avatar

I never knew my father. I even hesitate to call him that, it’s not a right to me

I guess I miss what might have been with this imaginary father in my imagination. We would have gone fishing, he would have taught me how to stand up to bullies and how to work on cars. Then I remember that my Mom taught me all of those things and how he is in reality isn’t anything close to what I was thinking.

He’d most likely drink a lot, go bowling and forget all about me. They say little girls seek out men who are like their fathers, because that was their role model of what “men” are. If I were to go by that, my father would be verbally abusive under the guise of ‘honesty’, critical of my appearance and selfish.

I can deal because I have a great Mom and rest of the family. I think it’s important for those of us with poor fathers, or no fathers, to grieve for our loss. It’s a big one and deserves to be dealt with so we don’t repeat their mistakes.

tinyfaery's avatar

I miss the fact that I never had a real father. Instead, I had an overseer who was more likely to hurt me than love me. And now that my mom died, I haven’t talked to or seen him in months.

Sometimes I watch movies or see people that they have great relationships with their dads and I feel envious. I will never have a real dad, even though my father is still living. I still mourn. But hey, I’m 36 now, I’m used to the absense, but I still feel the void.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

My dad died last year.I miss him more than anything.

marinelife's avatar

I’m sorry that your father walked out. I ams ure you remember good things about him as well as bad.

My dad died when he was young—55. I do miss him. I miss his incisive mind. I miss his laugh. He was not perfect. There was a lot I didn’t like about him (his uncontrolled temper), but on the whole I miss him.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I had the world’s greatest dad for twelve years, until he died when he was 35. Pulmonary edema leading to heart failure. F***ing still sucks. Yeah, I miss him.

filmfann's avatar

My step-daughter’s dad abandoned her when she was 2.
He would see her maybe twice a year, for an afternoon. She had issues for years over this.
She is now 31 years old, and has a 4 year old son, and her baby’s father left her before their son was born. She now has a healthy and productive relationship with her father.

Austinlad's avatar

I consider myself very fortunate that my family stayed together when I was growing up, though there were definitely cracks in later years. My dad passed away when I was in my 20s. I’m quite a bit older now than he was then, but I still wish I could sit down and talk with him about things I’m going through. And I’d love to tell him how grateful I am for having had him as my dad.

BoBo1946's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe sorry for you loss…so young!

My dad died in 1992. Dad was in mental hospital most of his life. He was a by-product of World War II. Dad landed on the beaches of Normandy on D-Day! Never recovered when he returned home. Just too much to bear. Actually, never knew my Dad. When he died, he was just there. You could never sit down with him and have a good conversation. Someday, i hope to sit down with him and have that conversation.

Funny story about Dad. One day when i pitching in high school, and back then, there was no fences. Dad walked out on the field (umpires went “nuts”...) and walked up to the mound and i said, “Dad, what do need!” He said, “just wanted to see you!” It was a little embarrassing, but touching at the same time.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@BoBo1946 I shouldn’t bitch about losing him. I got twelve extraordinary years. That’s more than a lot of people got. I can’t understand how some of these fathers look in the mirror, based on how they treated their kids. I was one of the lucky ones.

BoBo1946's avatar

Well, you have a good attitude about it…that is what important!

Facade's avatar

I miss thinking he could do no wrong.

majorrich's avatar

Dad passed away in 2008 and I am still going through his stuff so I can get my stuff out of storage. I found a box of clothing that still smelled like him and I had to stop for a while. I still harbor guilt over signing the order to stop feeding and pulling the IV’s and stuff to let him free. He wanted it, but I am still in therapy over it. We were very close.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@majorrich I think the fact that he wanted it should help in a little bit to get yourself right with this. That sucks you had to make the call, but there is living life, and being kept alive. Hope the therapy helps. Best wishes.

cookieman's avatar

Yup. My dad died in October of 2008 at the age of 62 after a quick and ugly battle with cancer. I miss him every day.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

My dad died in September of last year. I miss some things about him like his humor but mostly I’ve been able to breathe easier upon his passing – we didn’t have a good relationship.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Well, reading all these wonderful answers, I must say that I hope all those dads who passed on rest in peace and remain in their loved ones memories always. For those of us whose dads are still with us( a long distance away or not), may they live a good life and be loved by us.

Ludy's avatar

I am my dad’s only daughter and haven’t seen him for 6 years, I left when i was 17 years old in a way still a little girl and now i am a woman that he doesn’t know, daddy i miss u, and even tough i know you are not reading this, i love u and hope to c u soon, you are always in my prayers and altough we’re not phisically together you are always in my heart, the person that i have become is because of you, thank you

Berserker's avatar

My dad’s dead, so yeah I miss him a lot. I didn’t live with him much when he was around, but he always came to see me and took me to do things and stuff. He was awesome, like a mix between Gandalf and Long John Silver.

Whenever I say things like that, people wanting to be smarter than me keep saying I attribute him to fictional characters because he wasn’t around or because I didn’t know him much. Maybe that’s true but it probably isn’t, but either way I still miss him.

After playing Silent Hill Shattered Memories I don’t think I wanna think about this too much anymore. XD

mattbrowne's avatar

My Dad is just a phone call or 2-hour drive away. We keep in touch.

Linda_Owl's avatar

I never knew him (he took off when I was born, just not ready to be a parent I guess) – I have missed him all of my life.

Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

@Linda_Owl Yeah…Same thing happened to me too…it’s sad honestly…

meagan's avatar

My “Dad” is the dad that should have left. Hes an alcoholic, doesn’t care about anyone but himself, and is abusive.
Every time someone loses a parent, I wish that my father could have taken their place.
Hes a terrible person.

But I do understand what youre saying. That you wish you had that parent to bond with. Neither of mine are very good people, and I have no good memories of them. Even watching television family sitcoms upsets me, knowing that I’ll never have these memories.

Ludy's avatar

So you totally know what you are not going to be like when you become a father :)

strangers_lady's avatar

No. Last I saw him he beat me up.

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