General Question

mickhock's avatar

Is it possible to dislike someone on sight?

Asked by mickhock (540 points ) September 27th, 2010

Have you ever just looked at someone and know instantly that you don’t like them ? if so, why and how do you think it’s possible to do such a thing ?

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23 Answers

rangerr's avatar

People are judgmental assholes.
Yes, I’m guilty.

mickhock's avatar

The reason i ask is i was watching “deal or no deal” today and desperately wanted the guy playing to fail miserably because i had formed some kind of dislike for him.
He duly obliged and i was overcome with emotion and punched the air in triumph !! any ideas?

DominicX's avatar

If it’s possible to dislike someone on sight, it’s also possible to like someone on sight.

As @rangerr said, people are judgmental. They may assume you’re a bad person because they don’t like your haircut or your clothing style or your facial structure or your skin color or your acne or something along those lines. They don’t even have to realize it; it could be subconscious. Same goes for liking someone on sight as well.

And of course, it doesn’t have to be right as soon as you see them. Maybe you don’t like the sound of their voice or the way they talk, or the way they walk—something like that.

philosopher's avatar

That is called an illogical error.
I know people do it all the time. I try not to.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

@mickhock Some aspect of their visible personality most likely simply clashed with your own. While it’s somewhat understandable, these rush reactions won’t cause harm – unless you let them rule your life, which I don’t suggest. But, we’re all guilty of it, in one way or another.

For instance, I find it very hard to talk to women my age, or in the same general age, who say things like, “Oh my god, I know, right?!” in artificially high-pitched voices – about everything.

Something to keep in mind is that people react differently under pressure, and it’s important to realize that most people generally have much more substance than our initial gut reactions would lead us to believe. Sometimes not.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

It generally doesn’t work that way for me.I like to waste time getting to know the !@#$%^/ ;)

poisonedantidote's avatar

Quite recently actually, I was watching a news report about Australia saying they now had a new female prime minister runing the show. The very moment I clapped eyes on her I wanted to kick her down some stairs.

Why and how, I just knew from the her body language, the way she dressed, and more or less everything about her. she could have just as well been holding a sign saying “I am mega bitch”.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

From what you described in the second post, it really isn’t about disliking someone on sight. It sounds as if you took a dislike to the person on the game show because of an action or something that he said. While it is still judgmental, it is a bit more understandable than judging a person for their appearance.

JilltheTooth's avatar

Sure. we read a lot of nonverbal cues without even knowing it. Body language, subtle facial expressions, hair styles, manner of dress, etc. I rely on these… which is why I don’e debaye on fluther. I fail miserably at it if I can’t “read” the person.

Ultramarine_Ocean's avatar

Hmm…I believe so..I try to opt myself not to do so but, sometimes your gut tells you to stay away from some people (hopefully your gut is right).

philosopher's avatar

@Ultramarine_Ocean
I believe humans still have some kind of innate sense about people and things.
Psychologist however refer to judging people solely on looks as an illogical error.
They say that is a form of prejudice.
Some people dislike you because your thin, fat, tall, short, attractive,unattractive or other superficial reasons.
Isn’t this unfair?

lillycoyote's avatar

Yes, but I have had to learn to tell the difference between a person I simply don’t like at first, because I generally end up being proved wrong in those cases because I have allowed my biases and prejudices to cloud my thinking and, on the other hand, a person who creates a big spike on my creep/psycho/jackass meter. I am not usually wrong about them, though there has been the occasional jackass who proves me wrong too.

Ultramarine_Ocean's avatar

It is unfair since your only looking at something for the first time and you dislike it without knowing anything. I think (for me) it’s mainly based on things I already know. Like a memory. If you have a memory of someone that was much larger than you and had say….a certain look to his or her face that bullied you, you would think most people with those features would bully you. Basically a stereotype. Like if you tend to think a person with bad fashion sense, most (well at my school) would think they’re dumb.

Jeruba's avatar

It is, yes. It happens to me often enough. An impression is an impression, and it may be based on nothing we can pinpoint logically, not even a specific trait or a resemblance to someone else or the interpretation of a manner or style. It’s more like a blink of intuition, and I think it’s as honest a response as an instantaneous attraction. Snap judgments are a survival skill (friend or foe? dangerous or safe? duck or swing? speed up or slow down? avoid or confront? ours or theirs?); I don’t think we need to apologize for them. How else would we drive a freeway?

I do know when I’m doing it, and I also hold myself open to the possibility that future information may change my impression. One person to whom my first response was negative later became a close friend, and another at work turned out to be someone I respected and trusted. Other times I have indulged the reaction because nothing has ever arisen to counteract it or make me want to.

As long as I know that it’s my own private response, that it’s always open to revision, and that I’ll do and say nothing to harm the person or the person’s reputation, I’m okay with it.

Gamrz360's avatar

Yup, hate at first site.

CMaz's avatar

Its called intuition. I do it all the time. And, I am usually right.

Jabe73's avatar

Yes. Many people do this all the time. I also think some assholes do this when they are in their wolfpack groups of friends to show-off by putting someone else down (behind their back).

rooeytoo's avatar

@ChazMaz – that is so true, a second sense or something and it is a finely honed thing with me. Sometimes I am wrong but not very often. I think it is a defense mechanism.

@poisonedantidote – mega bitch, that makes it so sexist. Do you really mean you don’t like her because she looks like a hateful woman, what do you mean???

mattbrowne's avatar

Yes. When I first saw this guy on tv

http://images.habervitrini.com/haber_resim/metin_kaplan.jpg

I disliked him immediately. Probably because of his eyes. Turned out this guy wanted to convert the German city of Cologne into islamic caliphate with the sharia and everything.

6rant6's avatar

I certainly form an opinion. Sometimes, I suppose you could call it hate. Typically, a man who’s worked hard to achieve a look. But I also change my opinion pretty readily and pretty quickly as I learn about people.

I was doing a theater workshop for young people years ago – a drop in kind of thing. And this burly guy comes in wearing full black leathers, including metal stud collar, stud pants, and stud belt. So naturally, one would assume he was at least tough if not belligerent. But no, he turned out to be the shyest one in the group; it was amazing he’d made it to the event.

MRSHINYSHOES's avatar

Yes, everytime I turn on the t.v. and there’s an ugly guy or girl staring back at me and acting stupid in a dumb commercial. Yuck, ,makes me want to change the channel immediately.

GabrielsLamb's avatar

@mattbrowne Ahhh, Cologne, the home of the Black Church. There are supposedly evil spirits locked in the basement of that church, it’s a famous local legend

I think that it is possible yes, but many people do not understand exactly why. By the laws of physics people emit a frequency, a inaudible invisible vibration likened to a key signature or a musical note and some notes, as you know, do not go with other notes.

It is more than just looks, but most people assign it to that. It is deeper, layered almost, it is pheromone, vibration, body language, eyes, heat and energy as well.

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