Question
How old were you when your parents stopped supporting you?
Did they gradually reduce how much they helped you, or set a date by which you were on your own? What do you plan to do for your kids?
Answers
My parents have made it clear that as soon as each of their kids finish school (whatever level of schooling they want to pursue), they’d be done supporting them. For my sister, that’s going to be when she’s 30 years old and done with getting her doctorate. For me, that’s 22 years old and done with my bachelors.
While I was living with my parents they would cover the necessities such as most food, shelter, etc. After I started earning an allowance (by actually performing jobs around the house and at my Dad’s store) I was charged with buying my own clothing and other stuff that is less ‘required’.
When I moved out of my parent’s place at 17 I was completely on my own and didn’t receive any financial support from them, nor did I really want to ask for any. I think forcing me to be independent made me really strive to continue living that way and to make sure I can make it on my own. Yes, I got my University degree based on student loans, but who really doesn’t these days anyway.
I’ll probably do the exact same thing as my parents did for me and make my children work for what they get.
I personally think kids today mooch way too much off there parents. Get out the house get a job work hard and study and appreciate all that you have accomplished on your own.
My parents supported me completely through my undergraduate degree, and then helped me out somewhat through graduate school, to the tune of about $2K-$3K/year. Recently, I’ve been helping to support them (sending a couple hundred dollars their way each month, as they’re retired and on mostly-fixed incomes). They’re reasonably well set-up for retirement, though—the house is paid off, and their income covers their expenses—my money just means that they get to live in a little more luxury than they otherwise would.
They made it pretty clear to me that, while they didn’t mind supporting me through college, it was the rough equivalent of spending my inheritance. I didn’t mind, and still don’t—by the time they get around to leaving me an inheritance, I don’t think I’ll need it, but getting me that education then is part of what put me in the (relatively stable and prosperous) situation I’m in now.
My dad had a stroke three years ago, so he lost his job and the government decided they didn’t feel like giving us any disability. So actually I’ve been supporting my parents since then. I moved out just before my 18th birthday so they wouldn’t have to worry about feeding me. At the moment I am not able to send them any money (college fees are egregious) but I have helped them create a strong financial plan to facilitate the stress. My mother works for the City of Berkeley, so she doesn’t get paid very much.
My parents supported me through college, and even after, if I was in a situation where I was short fo money, my dad would give me a hand. He made it clear it was not a loan, it was money for me to use and not pay back.. He never wanted that hanging over our relationship.
My parents gradually started reducing money spent on me around the age of 14. While I was in their house, my food/shelter/etc was all paid for, as well as most school supplies, and basic clothing needs. I went away for school when I was sixteen and had no living expenses – scholarship – and my parents gave me a couple hundred every few months for art supplies and little things. Now I’m putting myself through college, including loans, though if an emergency comes up they would give me some money to tide me over – it hasn’t happened yet, as I’m pretty money smart, but it’s nice to know that exists. They pay for airplane tickets when I visit home, too.
They don’t really support me financially now – not on a regular basis, that is – and I expect pretty much everything will end once I graduate. I’m okay with that.
It would have been nice to have some help paying for college, but it just wasn’t possible for them so whatever.
15. I started working and that was pretty much it. They never offered to help out with anything else and I never asked. When I moved out at 16 I felt like I had full financial liability of myself. They did help pay for my college and I did let them, but due to it being lesser priority than the other things going on in their lives, I have since taken the burden of my college debts. But to be honest, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I have learned many things from growing up earlier than some.
16, kind of. That’s when I started working and had to buy my own things. They did give me shelter and food until I was 20 and moved out though. So take your pick, halfway at 16 and totally at 20.
I was always a pretty independent person, so I left home early, but my parents gave whatever financial support I needed throughout the years. Whenever my Father gave me money to help, I paid him back and he put it into a savings account. The money was never really a loan, but he wanted me to be a responsible person, and that’s why he did it that way. When he died, he left the money in that account to me along with my other inheritance. It was a very thoughtful thing for him to do.
@ trainerboy- my dad is the same way.
I’m 23 and living on my own, with all sorts of bills, most of which I can deal with on my own. My parents pay for gas (to a point) my cell, car ins., AAA, and any costs related to the continuing operation of my vehicle. Anything beyond that is up to me, but if they find out somehow that I’m in a financial bind, they’ll give me help, even though I don’t ask for it nor want them to. Their parents were the same way, so they extend the same level of support they got.
I’m very lucky in that regard, compared to a lot of other people, I may not be a perfect son, but I do what I can to deserve(I can’t think of a better word) that level of support.
@soundedfury: Me too! Hence the question. By the way—can I still persuade you to do a couple tattoo photos?
I moved out at 17 but my parents have always helped. My Dad had a serious accident 9 months ago and will be off work for a few more months. I have been very happy to be in aposition to give him some help when he needed it. I have a 15 year old son now and I will always be there to support him as long as I can although he knows the value of money and works for his allowance.
I forgot to clarify that there was no support, financial or otherwise, since I was 17. In fact, my mother and stepfather both claimed me (wrongly) on their taxes for years after, which really screwed up my ability to get need-based loans and grants in college. I paid for college myself with full-time jobs – although full-time school and full-time work I would not recommend for anyone.
@nikipedia – Yeah, I’m sure I have a photo of at least the Picasso. Not sure if I have one of the Le Brocquy, though. It’s kind of hard to get a good photo of without a little help.
My parents quit supporting me when I was 18 years old. When I had my daughter, she was seriously ill and had surgery at 6 weeks old. My husband and I were 25 years old. I could not work, because she was too sick. Hospital bills were enormous. They helped out a lot with diapers and formula and baby clothes. We never asked for help. They just knew we needed it. My dad would come by and say he had gone to a grocery store and they had all of these items on such a great sale, and he bought two of everything. One for us and one for him. Without their help at that time, things were already tough and they would have been a lot tougher.
At 16 moved abroad for a year, when I moved back I moved back in with my mum for a year, but we went half/half on the rent, car, bills, etc…....after that I was on my own.
My parents paid for the first three years of college. I didn’t get a full-time job till I was 20.
Then I got married and supported myself and my husband, who was a full-time student. My father discouraged me from going to college because he didn’t want to help pay for it, but bizarrely, once I was married and working 2 jobs, he began sending me a “clothing allowance”. I used it to finish college. When he died, he left me some money, and I went to graduate school.
My two sons always had jobs after they turned l5 or so. I told them I would always get behind education expenses. One of them finished his PhD and has continued to study within an institute. I don’t pay for it. To him this was kind of a shock, but he was 40 or so by then and I felt fine about it.

