How to handle Essential Tremors?

Bri, Just to clarify, did you diagnose yourself based on personal research, or did a doctor give you that diagnosis? If in fact it was a doctor, I assume that other movement disorders were excluded, since essential tremor is in fact a “diagnosis of exclusion”. That said, you might want to seek out a neurologist who specializes in movement disorders for help if you haven’t already. Sadly, there is no cure, but some medications can be effective in reducing the severity and frequency of the tremors including propranolol and primodone. There are others as well, but those are the “front-line” medications. Truthfully, there is no tried and true treatment, as each person responds differently to potential medications. So, you might not respond to one medicine, but have a great response to another. Best of luck.

The website you list seems to be quite extensive and most likely would be able to bring you in touch with people who have Essential Tremors… and they’d be probably able to talk from experience how they’ve managed to get around it socially and professionally.

Just off the bat if it is your hands and wrists that are shaking, I might suggest that you essentialize your hand movements; gesture less, and keep your hands on places of firm support. I have never come across anyone with ET, but for my students who get stage fright while public speaking and can’t stop their hands from trembling I tell them,

(a) keep your hands in a position that don’t draw attention; and
(b) actually, if you keep your voice steady and the rest of you calm, what seems screamingly obvious to you is often irrelevant for others. What is important really is what you are saying… looking good is a bonus, but if you believe in the importance of what you are conveying, then that will carry through.

Depending on the situation you might want to simply tell people about your condition , and ask if they have any questions about it. Once their curiosity is satisfied, you should be able to proceed without any awkwardness on either their part or yours.

My brother was a quadriplegic, and dependent on a respirator to breathe. He had all kinds of tubes and wires on his wheelchair, and people always stared when we went out for dinner or to the mall. When he caught someone gawking at him he would tell me to ask them if they wanted to ask him any questions. (he couldn’t talk because of the respirator, so I read his lips for people.) So I would go over to the gawker, and say “My brother noticed a curious look on your face, and he’d like to answer any questions you might have. Is there anything you’d like to know?” Of course they would quickly look away and apologize, but we always smiled at them and put them at ease. After asking a few questions and getting a friendly answer, they would go on about their business, and so did we.

Maybe doing something like this in social situations would be helpful for you. Nonchalantly let them know you saw them notice your hands shake. Tell them briefly about essential tremors, and they will soon forget the shaking. Then you could both feel more at ease. lifeflame had some good suggestions. Smile and nod at them alot. It will keep them focused on your face and away from your hands.

@ Shilolo – yes, thanks, I should have been clear. The whole shebang. All the tests down to the neurologist who told me. Thanks for the suggestions and input!

@ Lifeflame – I read the web site but I have just come to find such community here at Fluther I thought I would throw my line in here to. Your point b was something I had not considered. It is very like my personality to be hyper aware. I be your right. Thanks so much.

@ Scamp – That is a great idea to. Just be open to it.

One of the few occurances this has come up I indicated that I had not had “to much coffee or drugs” but that I do make great martinis now.

Thanks everyone! It helps just to talk about it!

I’ve been on the other end of the situation a few times. My personal experience is that if everyone tries to ignore something that is fairly obvious, it becomes the elephant in the room. If, however, the person I’m around matter-of-factly mentions the condition (not necessarily a lengthy medical explanation, almost in passing), then everyone can move on and not be distracted. Of course, you have to decide if you are willing to discuss your condition in more detail if you get questions (“I’m sorry, Id rather not monopolize this party conversation with my medical condition”). If you do decide that you’re okay talking about it, think of it as a chance to educate more people about something that affects people every day of their lives.

@syz – excellent point. I am really comfortable with what ever makes others comfortable. I just don’t want it to be misunderstood as drugs or nerves. And I don’t want to make a big deal of it or to have it become a big deal after I leave. Thanks!

@Bri_L I think you have a great attitude about this, and it will serve you well. I love the line about making great martinis. Something like that can put people at ease quickly. Good job!

@ Scamp – Now Im blushing! Thanks!

You’re welcome. You’re a great guy. I’m sure your winning personality makes people forget about a little hand shaking very quickly.

And it certainly didn’t stop Hepburn, did it? I remember her hands and head shaking slightly in her later films..Nn one cared; they still were a box-office hit and she was always sui generis and a role model for many women. And in those days, her ET’s were assumed to be Parkinson’s, which they were not.

Bri-you have gotten wonderful and useful answers. (I love Fluther when the collective helps.) Are you able to use a pencil, pen and drawing board when you are alone? Will the tremor remain as it is now?

We’re here if you need to bitch and moan…and I believe in humor for awkward situations; it has always helped me.

I certainly have gotten great answers. I can still use them pretty well. It may remain as it is now. it may worsen. I can cope with that I think.

I appreciate you all. !!!