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jrpowell's avatar

The happy welcomes in the upper left corner are getting boring. Can we come up with some weird or passive aggressive ones?

Asked by jrpowell (40562points) February 8th, 2009

Maybe we could opt into them.

I will start “I will cut you if you cook my cat.”

Now is your turn for teen angst.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

61 Answers

bythebay's avatar

You’re here again?
Call sec-ur-ity!

gailcalled's avatar

Left? Mine are at the right. And be careful about opening Pandora’s box.

eponymoushipster's avatar

“What the hell are you doing here, Mr. Awesome?”

“What are you looking at? Yeah, I thought so.”

“Say hello to your mother.”

jrpowell's avatar

@gailcalled :: Sorry, I’m dyslexic.

eambos's avatar

“I see what you did there <.<”
“Yes! You’re ba – Oh wait, it’s you again…”

steve6's avatar

You look marvelous. You have that certain je ne sais quoi. You are mysterious and sophisticated.

SuperMouse's avatar

Lurve? You call that lurve?

marinelife's avatar

Finally, the one I’ve been waiting for!

Harp's avatar

Don’t you have any “real” friends?

eponymoushipster's avatar

“What is it with you? Are you retarded or something?”

“You sick freak.”

“Apparently, you aren’t getting the vibe i’m sending you. SCRAM!”

“What’s it like to be an abortion survivor?”

eambos's avatar

That answer was great – for a two year old chimpanze(sp) with ADD.

Jayne's avatar

Speak of the devil…

shh, not so loud…Oh Hi!

Allie's avatar

Aww damn, you’ve found us.

No really, it’s okay to scratch your chicken pox!

Don’t talk back to me, mister!

Ooo, I’m telling your mom.

Your brother is hot. So, what happened to you?

I’ll sting you like you’ve never been stung before.

bythebay's avatar

@eponymoushipster: Retarded is spelled “retarted” – didn’t you see the romantic boyfriend thread? And the abortion survivor comment; more aggressive than passive. Yuck.

aprilsimnel's avatar

Get away from me, kid, you bother me!

Don’t think it isn’t a little slice of heaven to see you! Because it isn’t.

You’re just like school in the summer time – NO CLASS!

Harp's avatar

Um..are you feeling OK?

steve6's avatar

@gailcalled, Nice catch, sometimes I wonder if anyone reads what they write before they post it.

Allie's avatar

@Harp: To add to yours… “cause you look awful.”

@gailcalled: Do you have a suggestion to add to the thread or did you just want to complain about what was written?

tennesseejac's avatar

looks like someone forgot to put some pants on

Harp's avatar

No, no one has added you to their Fluther. Again.

Harp's avatar

And yet, you keep coming back. Go figure.

nikipedia's avatar

Weren’t you going to start working out?

cheebdragon's avatar

“Wow, you really do look like the Chuppacabra…”

SuperMouse's avatar

We lurve you, we lurve you NOT.

What happened to that New Year’s Resolution?

Harp's avatar

There, 1 point for visiting two days in a row. Now here’s another 2 for leaving.

kevbo's avatar

These aren’t the goats you’re looking for.

KrystaElyse's avatar

That outfit isn’t working for you.
We. Wouldn’t. Drink. Your. MILKSHAKE!
Wow, you need a tic tac.
Your hair looks really, really greasy today.

steve6's avatar

@Allie She did add something after her criticism and some people need to be corrected in an innocuous situation before they make a big mistake, like amputating the other left foot. No joke, that happened in the theater I worked in. They started writing “not this one” in Sharpie on the good foot.

Jayne's avatar

You see that button right down there? It exists for a reason.

You deserve a vacation. No, really, we mean it.

Did you replace your shampoo with Nair, by any chance?

Harp's avatar

Get lost here on your way to Yahoo Answers?

jlm11f's avatar

No. No one has PM-ed you to tell you how your answer really helped them. Quit looking.

Eeek. You haven’t looked at a mirror today, have you?

You want to punch johnpowell in the dick too? All right!

Tell me, do you like to be contacted by mods? Fix your txtspk.

Oh, you thought that was one of your best quips? Ouch.

Harp's avatar

We took the liberty of revising the “Fields of expertise” section of your profile. We were getting complaints.

aprilsimnel's avatar

Can you make this quick? I have to go.

Just when I’d forgotten you. Dammit.

o_O

For a second, I thought, ‘Hey, look, a sentient pizza!’ My bad.

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

“Don’t look back, the grammar police are after you.”

“I hear you make great pancakes.”

marinelife's avatar

These are funny, but I….................can’t…...................do…........................it.

I really like the nice sayings.

Here’s another nice one:
No really, johnpowell, we do lurve you!

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

“AstroChuck delivers.”

asmonet's avatar

I really wish Dr. J occasionally gave me some lip.
I don’t like Yes Men.

Or maybe we could set an attitude for him or it changed every few days as if he had moods, I mean, even GPS units can seduce me if I so choose nowadays.

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

“Did you mean for your hair to look like that?”

“Do I smell something burning?”

eponymoushipster's avatar

“you’re clever. really.”

“it’s like a baby’s thumb.”

“shouldn’t you be on MySpace, taking pictures of your ass?”

marinelife's avatar

Lurve to AlfredaPrufrock for the “Do I smell something burning?” quip.

I wish we had that one.

I can’t tell you how many times I have put water on for tea, gotten busy Fluthering, and when I remembered and ran in the kitchen, the pot was boiled dry!

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

@Marina, me too! I burn toast all the time while on here.

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

“You’re being checked out.”

“Who told you you could sing?”

peedub's avatar

Hey Mr.Baked-Ham, the shower’s that way.

Let’s rub one out together.

tennesseejac's avatar

@asmonet No I will not make out with you. Did ya hear that? this girl wants to make out with me in the middle of this fluther session.

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

“Your life is going down the toilet.”

“Snap out of it!”

asmonet's avatar

@tennesseejac: What’s new? Half of Fluther knows I want to bone them. :P

I wish to god that one was real.

KrystaElyse's avatar

I’m gunna dress you up in my luuuurve!

steve6's avatar

Are those real pictures of yourselves?

augustlan's avatar

You again?
Oh, it’s only you.
Meh. Don’t ask.

cheebdragon's avatar

The milkshakes are making you fat.

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

“June, I’m home!”

“How about Chinese take-out tonight?”

kevbo's avatar

Dammit, now I want Chinese.

jlm11f's avatar

“Do those jeans make you look fat?” Well it’s a matter of what angle you look at it really.

DID YOU EAT MY COOKIE?

When are you due? Oh…you aren’t.

What did the plastic surgeon say? Do you get a discount or not?

Oh..Hi! Erm, how long will you be staying?

Nice of you to drop by to say Hi. Bye now.

Welcome! Your ice cream is in the frizzer.

It’s not me, it’s you.

You lurve me more than I lurve you.

eponymoushipster's avatar

“Surprise, those 14 kids are YOURS!”

cheebdragon's avatar

“Halloween is over…you can take off the mask…....oh wait, that’s your face….my bad”

tennesseejac's avatar

dont you have something better to be doing?

put some pants on and go do something productive

learn to play an instrument or start that novel instead of wasting your time thinking of ridiculous questions that are just going to get ridiculous answers from random people you dont know

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

“Is that your personal theme music I hear?”

“That smell! Oh. It’s your feet.”

“Actually, I do mind.”

“Your turn to walk the dog.”

AlfredaPrufrock's avatar

“Never trust a pretty girl, or a lonely midget.”

andrew's avatar

“Why don’t you crawl back in the frizzer?”

Bluefreedom's avatar

“I’ll delete people for pancakes.”

davidbetterman's avatar

Go directly to jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.

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