In an inebriated state of mind, Now add an authority figure. How good or bad did it turn out.

My mom has called me when I’m drunk. Before, when she didn’t know for sure that I drank, I’d just ignore it. Now she knows I drink, and she knows when I’m going out to drink, so I just answer it. Yes, even if I’m really drunk. She usually calls before 10pm (she goes to bed early most nights) and I’m not nearly as drunk at 10pm as I am at 1am. It works out well.

I was 16 and had been out drinking. I was super wasted. I came home past my curfew I was bouncing off the walls in my hall trying to find my room. I woke my mom up. She was pissed. She is yelling at me and I puke on her feet. Then I vacuum the vomit. The vacuum was thrown away because it always smelled bad after that. I pass out and my mom pours water on me.

I wake up the next day and think I pissed my bed. Mom makes me take the mattress outside and clean it. Its the end of the schoolyear and mom takes me and my sisters to our schools to get our report cards. Then she takes us to Shoneys for the breakfast bar. I am so hungover I wish I was dead. Im sipping a sprite and mom is eating bacon saying “Dont it look so good Buster?” “Its so greasy.” I get up and run to the bathroom to vomit. Mom fucked with me all morning. Wouldnt let me go back to bed. Making me sick. I dont blame her though. We laugh about it now.

My husband had a similar experience, buster. When his mom caught him, she woke his ass up bright and early and made him work in the yard all day, pulling weeds by hand in the hot summer sun. He was sick as a dog.

My boss in college got us all hammered at a bowling alley, the next day he called us in early cause there was an issue with the render farm. we got there all hungover and he said ok fix the issue i am going home cause he was hungover but left us all there to work.

I was actually stoned with my buddy derek at a highschool party. 350mlg of Xanex and a little mary jane. When the cops rolled in they had no idea what was going on they only knew of the alcohol. Then the rents showed up. They thought i was drunk but i pulled off clean on the breathalyzer thing. Got away with it perfectly. hehehe.

I’ve come home drunk to my dad quite a few times, including once when I was bawling outside (for no apparent reason, of course, just that I was really drunk and had made myself throw up all the liquor), but walked in the door and snapped to attention and had a conversation with my dad. He was none the wiser. I’ve come home drunk to my dorm in college and talked to the security officers and RAs too… all quite interesting and hilarious times. Never had a law enforcement run-in though, luckily.

I am trying to think of personal ones and all I have is stories of my friends. I am having trouble posting.

In college, I pledged a fraternity and one Satuday evening the pledges “threw” a party for the brotherhood. We were not allowed to bring dates and we had to dress up as Playboy Bunnies.
This was 1967 guys.

I attended a commuter school in Manhattan and that is an integral part of the story.

I got drunk. I mixed scotch with passionpunch with anything else I could get my hands on and I passed out on a couch somewhere.

Someone drove me home, escorted me upstairs to my parent’s apartment around midnight, still dressed in my bunny costume: white cottontail, a leotard and some very large ersatz breasts.

I walked in and my great-aunt Sadie was visiting and staying for the night.

I kissed her, smelling like a saloon (me not Aunt Sadie) and one side of my “padding” fell out and dropped into Aunt Sadie’s lap.

I don’t remember my exact words but my comment went something like, I’m sorry my tits fell in your lap Aunt Sadie and the old lady just fumed. You could see the steam coming out of her ears, embarrassed and angry…...

My grandmother wouldn’t speak to me for three days…...

I apologized profusely to Aunt Sadie in the morning after my mother informed me what I had said since I had absolulely no recollection of anything that happened that night (and still don’t).

Next time I saw her was probably at a family event and she never mentioned anything about it ever again.

SRM

@srmorgan That is absolutely fabulous! :)

lolz she’s got me beat.

@CroG It’s even funnier than you think…srmorgan is a guy.

lmfao!

oh thats good.

HE was wearing a playboy bunny outfit! lolz i about spit my cocoa everywhere

I’ve gotten drunk with a lot of professors. Nothing horrible has ever come from it except them making fun of me for saying something ridiculous.

Before our work Christmas party some years ago, my manager and some other of us decided to meet at a bar to get a little relaxed before having to mingle. We were all pretty close; we were the front desk “team” at a hotel I worked at. Well, he kept buying me shots of Patron, and before I knew it I was smashed. Couldn’t talk, could barely walk.

At the Christmas party, I laid low and just sat with my plate of finger foods- that is until they announced December’s employee of the month. It was me. What you imagine is probably pretty accurate. I stumbled up to the front of the packed room and took the award from the hotel GM (big wig) and for some reason thought I was supposed to make a speech. I grabbed the mic from the GM’s hand and started thanking everyone who voted for me, and she actually let me go on for a while before she took the mic back.

I think my manager set me up on purpose.

I used to get drunk with my dad all the time well, not all the time, but we would drink beer together, and on many occasions we would drink a lot of beer!