General Question

fml's avatar

What should you do when you just got ditched by all your friends and you're sitting at home, crying?

Asked by fml (56points) October 11th, 2010

basically today was supposed to be one of the best nights ever and i literally spent 2 hours getting ready only to find out that ALL of my friends bailed and went without me. (they went earlier then we agreed on and didnt tell me) now im stuck at home and i cant stop crying. i dont really know how to cheer myself up….any help?

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35 Answers

wesdavis's avatar

find new friends they are not friends if they ditched you

FutureMemory's avatar

Have you sent them texts asking why they didn’t wait for you?

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Get new friends.

rangerr's avatar

Forget them and go out somewhere else with better people.

diavolobella's avatar

Is it possible that in the midst of all the preparations, that each friend might have thought one of the others had informed you? Maybe it was a complete oversight. Has enough time passed since the event started that they should have contacted you and asked “Hey, where are you?”

I’m sorry your evening was ruined, but perhaps it wasn’t intentional. Give them a chance to explain, but if they didn’t even think about letting you know, I agree with those who say to look for better friends.

ANef_is_Enuf's avatar

I agree with @diavolobella, it may have been an innocent (albeit inconsiderate) mistake. Cheer up, there will be other nights.
In the meanwhile, could you possibly make other plans now that you’ve gone through the trouble of getting ready?

diavolobella's avatar

Yes, if the event is still going on, couldn’t you still go? You’d be late, but wouldn’t miss it completely. Seems a waste to have gotten all fixed up and not go.

marinelife's avatar

I agree that it may have been an oversight. Have you considered that possibility?

If not, living well is the best revenge. Think of someone cool that you can call and ask to go with you. Then go to the event and show up and appear to have a marvelous time.

CyanoticWasp's avatar

Well, if you’re sitting at home crying, then you should take off the fancy duds so that you don’t ruin them.

Otherwise, if you’re all dressed up and want to go out, then go. The night is yours, kiddo.

Response moderated (Unhelpful)
smokeweedeveryday's avatar

First, you should cry it out.
Second, You should ask them why are they being shity friends.

weeveeship's avatar

They ditched you, so you should just leave them. Obviously, they don’t think you are important. Confronting them could shed some light, but I think it is more likely than not to just turn into a “he said, she said” argument (“What do you mean I didn’t call you? etc.)

Rarebear's avatar

Quit feeling sorry for yourself and realize that only you can control your own happiness and self-esteem. Nobody can do that for you.

fml's avatar

i never really used this site before so im just gonna answer everyone on here. im 100% sure they intentionally ditched me (i texted them) and i cant go anywhere else tonight because i dont have a ride and pretty much everyone else is busy. thanks tho(: i guess ill just try to find better friends

diavolobella's avatar

@fml. I’m sorry to hear that. I hope that you find some friends who will treat you as nicely as you deserve. In the meantime, try to cheer up. If that’s the kind of people they are, you really aren’t missing much are you? :) Who wants to hang out with a bunch of jerks?

Written's avatar

Bah. Idiots. Ignore them. I mean, ’‘getting new friends’’ is not easy, not at all, but true friends would never do that.

Get used to backstabbers and two-faced hypocrites, the world is filled with them. Anyway, watch a funny movie, do something that will cheer you up. As Neil Patrick Harris (aka Barney Stinson) said on many occasions:

’‘When I’m sad, I just stop being sad and be awesome instead.’’

CyanoticWasp's avatar

@fml this is a good place to make some friends, and since the night yawns before you…

sliceswiththings's avatar

Aw I’m so sorry to hear that, sweetie. That was me the other night, except with my [now ex-] boyfriend. I recommend getting out of the house. Go for a long walk. The fresh air and endorphins might help cheer you up. On my long walk I continued to cry, and actually was confronted my strangers asking what’s wrong, which helped to vent to them. If there’s someone you can call crying and just let it out, do. Above all, try to distract yourself before bed. Emotions tend to be strongest at night, so watch a Marx Brothers movie or do a puzzle or keep walking or something until you think you can fall asleep.

Alternatively, if you’re all dressed up and looking fine, go out on your own and talk to strangers! Make new friends!

lemming's avatar

Go try and find someone who will give you a big hug, I think you need it. I’ll give you a vitual one….....there.

cak's avatar

I’ll bite. Did anyone of them have the guts to tell you why they ditched you?

Here’s the thing, believe me, life is far too short to worry about people that don’t respect you. Respect yourself enough to stop relying on them and start putting yourself first. I promise, I’m not trying to be mean.

Frenchfry's avatar

I would of pretended I forgot or didn’t care. I would never give them the satifisfaction that it bothered me. I would never texted them. I would never make plans with them again. Want to make yourself feel better. Go buy something. Shopping makes me feel better. Friends come ,and go as I have learned in life. Some will come by trust me when you least expect it.I would get some movies, and make some brownies as well.

zen_'s avatar

You must keep us posted.

fml's avatar

Thanks everyone(: I just took a long walk and i feel a little better. I think I’m gonna go meet new people tomorrow. and @lemming thanks for the virtual hug. i needed it ;)

Written's avatar

You want a virtual cake? I can give you that. Or… Y’know. A virtual fist bump.

Don’t waste time on people like that. The older you get, you will meet more and more bad people. People who just want to use you. Finding good friends today isn’t easy.

Again, do something fun, forget about that, do something that makes you satisfied.

fml's avatar

@Written that made me laugh(: thanks for the advice. ill probably watch a funny movie later to forget about tonight

josie's avatar

Did you do something to cause them to abandon you?

fml's avatar

@josie Not really….at least i dont think so.

josie's avatar

@fml Then there has been a mix up in communication, or you need to find new friends. The first possibility is easy to prove. Call the person in the crowd who you felt was the most loyal friend and ask the following-“Was there a mix up, or did you guys blow me off. ” Act according to the answer.

Vortico's avatar

@fml I know how you feel! This happened last night and today for me! But instead of crying it out, I went to the basement and continued working on one of my hobbies (building an RC plane while listing to IDM records) for hours and hours. :) I was so involved in the project, I ended up forgetting all about the friend thing. I felt a whole lot better.

Find something you enjoy doing alone, and use it to vent your bad feelings whenever you need.

sweetsugaryandohsohot's avatar

stop texting, twittering, facebooking and calling them and find better friends

BarnacleBill's avatar

Don’t give them permission to make you feel bad. If they did it intentionally, they sound like jerks, and you would have had a miserable time.

Trillian's avatar

Take another look

CMaz's avatar

Sometime a good slap in the face can be very helpful.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

In the long-term, I agree with @ChazMaz . While in high school, there were six of us that hung out daily. One day, Becky and I went to school and found ourselves shunned by the other four. To this day, we have no idea why.

As traumatic as it was at the time, it turned out to be the best thing for us. Becky and I ended up hanging out with another group of girls who brought love, laughter and acceptance to our lives that we both needed, albeit for different reasons.

I hope that in your case, it was just a misunderstanding. If not, please know that life provides an interesting amount of twists and turns. I wouldn’t trade how my life has turned out for any of those in the original group.

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