Has this ever happened to anyone, you write what you feel is a really good response and then you accidently erase it. Damn it.
I said so much good stuff. Crap. The main point was that the homeless are iconoclastic. The total image of the homeless changes much less than the individual homeless. It’s like the hands on a clock, the second hand is the new homeless coming and going, and the hour hand is like the total view of all the homeless, almost everyone has an idea 0f what they think the home-impaired resembles. And yes I am aware of the fact that I use a little fancy speech to attempt to convey as much as possible, to me, I think this is cool too, I mean at least have a heart when I say that I feel that I’m at least a half way decent chum(p).
I wanted to start a nation wide magazine for the homeless by, some, of the homeless, like 50/50 on that. It would have a constant section dedicated to what it’s like to be homeless in as many cities as possible. And it would have interviews with real homeless from those towns. A lot of homeless people migrate so this could really be useful in helping someone on an individual basis, one good reason is because some places you really cant be homeless in. It would give the newly homeless a code of conduct, of how to present yourself and to whom. Also a test you can give yourself to see what your chances are of escaping the street, or if you dont got what it takes to scrape yourself off the road.
Like I said, my other rant was better, but I think I still managed to pop the proverbial zit a bit more. I like to think that I can help s0me0ne as much as I am enjoying writing this. I like Fluther, I hope it likes me, some, though right now I am in a world of hurt, pain, confusion; pick one, right? Sorry guys Im a couch surfing joy killer. I have people threatening my life right now and I am one of them. I would love to not say or doing anything that will cause me more loss. I have done things unconscionable and the difference between the things of that sort that Ive done and what you may have done, is that I have done these things. I say a prayer before going into every bar, I ask god to put me in contact with the most messed up person in the bar. I first did this in hopes to be able to help someone that needed it the most. But now I realize that at my very best I can only help someone, half of the time. And only a fraction of that is a permanent change. Intent is a motherfucker. I want to say that being good matters, that even though I have made some mistakes, I’m still good, can you just smell my self confidance and assurance, I cant, I cant judge myself, I just realized that. Thats why Im always telling people the worst about me, so they can judge me, because I must feel that once Im properly judged I can move on with myself. Saying this wants me to hedge my bets and call myself pathetic. But I could be dead on and Im back pedalling a go-go, so now it’s lame. Whoops. See I dont really care, I must have at one point, and by care I mean to treat someone or something as I treat myself, is that nihilistic?? Now what, I feel like Ive once again painted myself into a corner. Maybe I shouldnt say paint. I do a mean watercolor on fine French paper, but every other kind of painting I dislike. Wow, neat, I go now.
Oh yeah one more thing, there is like the hierarchy of support it goes something like this:
God(optional)
Parents
Distant Relatives
Friends (true ones)
Business Assossciates
Society (everyone else)
Composing members:
0
