What quips have your heard lately that made you laugh?
Asked by
Cruiser (
40449
)
October 29th, 2010
I had to ask this as I was inspired by @wundayatta’s quip here in the 3rd comment down
“Could you hear my eyes rolling?”
That is just darn funny!! Made me laugh out loud! I mean even if I was mad at the moment and someone said that to me I would probably have to laugh!! XD
That is why I like it here…all sorts of crazy stuff is said and much of it funny as hell. Do you have a favorite quip you have heard or even one of your own you can share to make today a happier day??
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26 Answers
erichw1504’s response to the question ”Would you be flattered or creeped out if someone told you they had a dream about you?”
My favorite is one that I just saw this morning, from @missPoovey to answer a question about giving tax breaks to organ donors. “How do you enjoy your tax break if you are dead and just donated your organs?” :oD
One that I use quite often when I goof up. I see said the blind man to his deaf wife.
I really miss my ex-wife, but my aim is getting better!
Read this any found is amusing, but not funny…and so true! “Have you ever noticed the people who tell you to calm down . . . are the ones that got you mad in the first place.”
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A friend of mine recently told me that my pants were so loud her eyes were ringing.
“Go make me a sandwich.”
Cracks me up every time.
@JustmeAman, I love that statement and use it often! A friend of mine that worked at a university loved it also, and I picked it up from him.
I also have one when I want to get a little sarcastic. You have your right to be wrong.
In a meeting run by a couple of useless middle managers who actually used the phrase “There’s no ‘I’ in ‘Team’” the response was “But there are 2 in ‘idiot’; looks like “Team’ borrowed them.”
I’m remembering a really funny statement by Frank Burns on an old episode of M*A*S*H. I hope I’ve got the quote correct, but even the gist of it is funny.
Frank: You guys are just saying that to help me look foolish!
Hawkeye: No Frank, you don’t need our help.
@Kardamom I remember that episode and that quip stuck with ever since!! Good one!
I heard about one from a resturant.
Customer: Waiter to you server Crab here?
Waiter: Yes Sir we serve anyone.
Also overheard at a restaurant
Waiter (pointing at unfinished food): “You wanna box for that?”
Customer: “Nah, you can keep it. I’m not much of a fighter.”
“I stayed up all night to make you 10K sammiches. Enjoy them or I will kick your ass.” Chels to Bob
My brother-in-laws facebook status – “I like to steal food from babies, I know I’ll get in trouble if I get caught.
But that’s the rusk I’m willing to take.
Soccer is like chess, but without the dice.
Brand new one that made me think “I have to get back and post this on that fluther question”
Grandma, after accidentally putting Preparation H on her toothbrush: “Well, now I have a shit-eating grin!”
Love you, Gram
@Cruiser : New avatar, funky specs, you’re lookin’ a bit like a rocket surgeon yourself, there! ;-)
@JilltheTooth Gee thanks and sippin on a bit O’ my rocket fuel there too! ;)
After the day I’ve had here can I come over for some sippin’? I’ll bring the Rum I would’ve put into the fruitcake…
@JilltheTooth Sure sippin time anytime but if I see a fruitcake coming anywhere near me…out comes Mr. Remington!
@Cruiser ; tough guy, huh? I’m not afraid. I have a contract with the DOD, they’re incorporating my fruitcake into a new body armor design!
@JilltheTooth Now I am interested….I make wearing compounds and looking for something tougher than silicon carbide or ceramic…might be on to something here. Protect steel from wear and abrasion with fruitcake…hmmmm!
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