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Seelix's avatar

Do you worry more about the cleanliness of your home when your mother-in-law visits, or when your mother visits?

Asked by Seelix (14886points) November 23rd, 2010

The inlaws are coming for a visit tomorrow, and I’ve been tidying up the house. As I was cleaning, I realized that I’d be much more thorough and obsessive about my cleaning if it were my own parents coming.

What about you? Why do you think you feel that way?

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22 Answers

squirbel's avatar

Mother in law, dur.

My mom “knows” me. :P

But then you might feel that way because your in laws aren’t cleanly.

wundayatta's avatar

My wife is in charge of cleaning (which means, she engages the cleaning lady and then cleans up for when the cleaning lady comes). It seems to me that she obsessed more about my parents than her own mother. But her mother rarely came to spend the night, and now won’t ever be coming.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I try not to worry either way – pisses me off that I even have to think about this nonsense. My mom has given up on me and my cleanliness but she’s a clean freak and I am not so she just ignores it all now (she lives with me). My MIL – when she comes to visit, my husband and I try to clean up a bit but don’t waste too much time on it.

Seelix's avatar

@squirbel – That’s not the case at all. My mother and my mother-in-law both keep a very clean house.

Aster's avatar

Madly!! Obsessively!! Esp with my MIL; they were all neatniks and I’d throw myself into cleaning and straightening up for hours !

iamthemob's avatar

Mother-in-law. Totally.

I think that it has to do with the (unsupported) paranoia that if my MIL (well, my figurative MIL as I don’t have the legal equivalent) is unhappy with the cleanliness of the house, my partner will hear it and then I get passive-aggression and or open critique from two sides. Unhappy “wife,” unhappy life. ;-)

That, combined with the natural tendency to give your guests a clean house…that apartment is damn clean.

janbb's avatar

Mother-in-law. My mother never would have criticzed the cleaning – she was all about the food and stealing tastes from the kitchen.

Scooby's avatar

When I was married it wasn’t the tidiness of the house that worried me, I left all that to the wife to worry about…What concerned me more was my garage being tidy & all my tools put back in place, as that’s where the father in law & me headed to as soon as they landed, he was a right hard arse about a tidy workshop & garage :-/
Still it stood me in good stead, I can still find what I need when I need it…. Lol….. The house is a slightly different story, especially at the moment!

JilltheTooth's avatar

and people ask me why I’ve never married…

Cruiser's avatar

Neither…My house is always clean or being cleaned and guests can show up unannounced and vacuum the stairs while they wait until I am done sweeping out the garage!

christos99's avatar

As a single guy, I must admit I always have a clean house, however, there’s clean, and momma clean. Momma clean is required to spare you from the lecturing and having her lend you a helping hand…

Scooby's avatar


No garage workshop huh?? ;-)

marinelife's avatar

It would have been mother-in-law.

ucme's avatar

My Mother knows where the vacuum cleaner lives. Feather duster anyone :¬)

tranquilsea's avatar

It used to be my MIL…until I realized that her cleanliness issues were hers and not mine. She’s the white glove kind of guest.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

My own family is so much more critical than any other people I’ve known so if I clean enough to get only a passing smirk from my mom then everyone else will be comfortable.

Seaofclouds's avatar

My mother. My mom is a neat freak. My mother-in-law is a lot more laid back than my mom when it comes to how clean something is. My mother-in-law is more of a tidy person, while my mom is more of a white glove checking for dust person. Now, my mom wouldn’t actually pull out a white glove, but if there is dust in a vent, she will notice it. It’s just how she is. Because of her, I was taught how to clean very thoroughly.

AmWiser's avatar

My house is as tidy as it is going to get, weather it be for in-laws or parents. It’s my house and I don’t live in it for anyone else. I learned a long time ago, it doesn’t matter how clean or tidy your house is, someone is going to find something wrong. Might as well give ‘em something to talk about. My motto is ‘what are they going to do?...send me to bed without any supper!’
Actually, I say ‘what are they going to do?....kick my ass!’

Supacase's avatar

I used to worry about my in-laws. Then I figured out my MIL will do the laundry and dishes.

casheroo's avatar

My mother. My mother in law has a messy house, so nothing bad about my place could even compare. My mother is complete OCD about cleaning, she comes in and judges me if there is even a touch of dust on the window sill.

YARNLADY's avatar

Not any more. I used to be worried because my mother was totally a cleanliness person, but she has been gone more than 25 years now. My Mother-In-Law doesn’t express an opinion.

mattbrowne's avatar

No, but my wife surely does. Drives me a bit crazy sometimes.

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