General Question

mcbealer's avatar

What does it mean when someone receives a gift, but thanks you only for the card accompanying it-not the actual gift?

Asked by mcbealer (10198points) April 6th, 2008

Are they dodging the fact that they didn’t like their gift or is it just an oversight? I realize this is all conjecture, but I really had to bite my tongue and not remark, “Oh, you’re welcome! and how about the *** ?”

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15 Answers

emmygirl's avatar

I would say they didn’t like the gift but they didn’t want to walk away and not thank you for something, so the card was the next best thing.

rowenaz's avatar

Are you absolutely sure they got the gift, and not just the card?

bettyac82's avatar

Like I said, good thing it wasn’t me! Even if you don’t like a gift you should at least acknowledge receiving it. If you don’t like it, be honest don’t just pretend it didn’t exist!!!!! Next year, no gifts just cards!!!

mcbealer's avatar

@ rowenaz ~ both present and card were hand delivered simultaneously.

kapuerajam's avatar

mcbealer the recipient of the gift might have asked one of your famliy members to thank you for the gift but the faimly member forgot to tell you.

gailcalled's avatar

@mcbealer; why bite your tongue? If you ask politely about the gift, no one can fault you. It is the recipient who is either being rude or somehow doesn’t know that the card came attached to a present.

spendy's avatar

@mcbealer, you could also consider just inquiring with a bit of diplomacy. Like, “I’m so glad you liked the card. Also, I just want to make sure you got the gift I left with it. Did you receive it? I was afraid maybe it got left behind/overlooked/stolen/whatever works, since you didn’t mention it.” Diplomacy, my crutch of choice. :)

babygalll's avatar

Was it a funny card? They may have opened the gift in front of you, but wanted to take time at home to really look at the gift. Did you receive a thank you card? Maybe they want to thank you with a card?

mcbealer's avatar

update @ all ~ I’ve had some time to think about this and… it was actually 2 gifts, I forgot to write that in earlier. Also, I was not there when this person opened their gifts or card. When I saw them next, they said, “Thanks for the presents. I really liked the card.”
@gailcalled and @spendywatson ~ I guess in the moment I was just too dumbfounded to say anything. I’m not exactly in possession of a whole lot of tact in situations like that, it’s something I need to work on. So I stayed quiet lest I say something inappropriate.
I guess I’m wondering if any of you who have responded have found yourselves in a similar situation, and how you handled it? Maybe I’m reading too much into this…

babygalll's avatar

MANY TIMES..not necessarily giving gifts, but I do a lot for certain people and I never get a thank you. A verbal thank you would be enough for me, but I don’t even get that.

spendy's avatar

Just a thought regarding “Thank You“s…if the reason for getting one is simply to know that the person received what you gave (and only if you gave a material item), then that seems okay. However, if you need to hear “Thank You” for something nice you did for someone, then is it possible that the nice things you do are for the wrong reasons? Doing nice things to feel appreciated seems to contradict the entire purpose, no? And I’m in no way insinuating that you are one of those people @babygalll, just throwing the thought out there. Not directed at you, but the entire group.

I think I’ll start a new Q for this one…lol

cwilbur's avatar

It means that you should really reconsider your attitude towards giving gifts, if you get so worked up over whether you’re specifically thanked for things.

mcbealer's avatar

@ cwilbur ~ I think when a considerable amount of thought goes into a gift and it’s trumped by a greeting card, you have to wonder… at least I did. Thanks for your blunt assumption.

Crick7's avatar

I would make sure they knew there was a gift to go with the card. They might not have known which one it was. We have all seen how gifts and cards are not always attached.

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