Social Question

Dutchess_III's avatar

Women: You can't live with 'em, and you can't live without 'em. Why did that saying come to be?

Asked by Dutchess_III (46526points) December 12th, 2010

And more than anything, why is it said about women and not men? If anybody ever said, “Men: You can’t live with ‘em, and you can’t live without ‘em,” I think most women would just laugh!

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37 Answers

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Some man who didn’t want to give up destructive habits that annoy women.

Seaofclouds's avatar

I’ve heard it said about men more than women. I’m not sure when or why it started though.

roundsquare's avatar

I’ve heard it both ways.

Basically, it says, “we want sex, but we don’t want to talk to them afterwards.”

syz's avatar

Men. You can’t live with them, you can’t shoot them. (That’s the way we hear it in my house.)

bkcunningham's avatar

Women. You can’t live with them, you can’t afford to divorce them. It is the origin of the phrase, it’s cheaper to keep her, phrase. ; )

kenmc's avatar

Bitches be crazy~

josie's avatar

Couldn’t tell you.
Women are great, and I am desperately in love with one.
But if they all disappeared tomorrow, there would still be golf, fishing, scotch and kick boxing. It wouldn’t be the same, and I would miss sex, but I think I would get by.


Because women are such indecisive, contradictory, unpredictable, unstable creatures!! The total opposite of us men! (lol—wink)

wundayatta's avatar

Unless you know who said it first, you don’t know where it came from. It’s just a clever way of describing the difficulties between the sexes. It’s terribly difficult living with your SO, but it’s also impossible to be happy without him or her.

jlelandg's avatar

@Neizvestnaya I sense anger in your response.

FireMadeFlesh's avatar

It seems to me that the person who first used the saying was out of their depth in their relationship, and was not able to behave in a manner conducive to a healthy relationship.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

@jlelandg: Nah but the following images did go through my head when I read this:

Men trimming their nails anywhere outside a bathroom.
Men dripping pee on the toilet seat, the floor surrounding the toilet.
Men snorting back snot instead of blowing their noses.
Men dropping something on the floor and walking around/away from it.

I work with several teams of men. Sometimes they do icky things.

kenmc's avatar

@Neizvestnaya Women do icky things too!

Neizvestnaya's avatar

@kenmc: I’m not telling.

kenmc's avatar

@Neizvestnaya You don’t need to, I’m older than 12~

laurora's avatar

I’m pretty sure this quote is a spin on “Men: can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em.” :D


Btw, there is a good deal of truth to what I said. ;)

DrasticDreamer's avatar

@MRSHINYSHOES And your answer proves that typical men love to pigeonhole women. Unstable? Possibly because opinions like that drive us insane.

kenmc's avatar

@DrasticDreamer Don’t think @MRSHINYSHOES is typical.

ucme's avatar

I think that was Ted Bundy’s quote…philosophy. Sick twisted individual that he was.

Aster's avatar

Why did it come about? Some guy , somewhere, dreamed it up. I’ve also heard it used more often about men. A friend of mine said it about teeth.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Aster But it’s stuck. And it is said about women, not men. I have a feeling it’s because women tend to nurture their men, more than the other way around. Reports say that more men are unhappy after a divorce than women. I know I was relieved after my divorce!

@wundayatta I disagree that you can’t be happy without a SO.

Aster's avatar

I’ve never heard it said about women. Really.
Whether you can be happy without an S/O I guess depends on the person. God knows you can be miserable with one. lol

wundayatta's avatar

@Dutchess_III Then the saying doesn’t apply to you.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@wundayatta Huh? That one went over my head. The last four years of my first marriage were absolutely miserable. He finally left because he had a girlfriend. Two weeks later, they broke up and he wanted to come home. During those two weeks it gradually dawned on me that I was so much calmer and happier with him gone. When he said he was coming home, much to his shock I said, “No.” He spent a freaking year campaigning to get me back.

Aster's avatar

Ohhhh Dutchess !! That is great !! My last 2 years were worse than miserable. A living nightmare.
He had a girlfriend; so original. Then they broke up in a year and he spent half an hour trying to get me back and had his sister call me with the same request. I knew I was so much calmer and “happier” with that screeching lunatic gone. So, it’s a similar situation.

Dutchess_III's avatar

A whole half hour, huh?! Sheesh!

wundayatta's avatar

@Dutchess_III You said, “I disagree that you can’t be happy without a SO.”

I said the saying doesn’t apply because the saying says, “you can’t live without them.”

You can be happy without a SO. The saying therefore doesn’t apply to you.

Aster's avatar

Half an hour not looking at me, but at the stupid floor. No emotion that time. I know his MOTHER told him to do it. I can’t think of any technique that would have worked, anyway.
The tearful one over the phone was nice, though. But I didn’t say anything then either.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Good for you @Aster! ((( )))

Dutchess_III's avatar

@wundayatta That’s what I’m saying! The saying says, “Women: You can’t live with them, you can’t live without them!” It doesn’t say we women can’t live without men~

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
Dutchess_III's avatar

I just tried to give me a GA, but…then I realized it was me. I didn’t recognize my avatar!

When people get modded and you never saw the original post, do you go mad with curiosity? I do.

You ever feel like you’re talking to yourself? Like, you’re the only one in the room and you’re having a FABULOUS coversation? I do.

garyman's avatar

.and God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world..then he made the Earth round…and he laughed and laughed…
Women are sure pain in my soft parts but anyway without them it wouldn’t be complete

NomoreY_A's avatar

As my old pappy used to say, I wouldn’t touch that one with a ten foot pole.

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