This is totally tongue in cheek and any serious answers will get you pistol whipped, But what is the hardest part of being a man today?

The hardest part is not being a dick. (You said you wanted tongue in cheek.)

Resisting the urge to see how every hole feels

@janbb Totally LMAO @Winters, Hawaii Jake, ditto

The hardest part is keeping it up all the time. We’ve got Viagra and Cialis. The pressure is tremendous.

Being wrong all the time.

You’ve heard the statement “If a tree falls in the woods and there is no one there to hear it. Did it make a sound?” Well “If a man says something and a woman is not there to hear it. Is he still wrong?

Hitting the toilet.

I’m happy to be pistol-whipped, but what singing cowboy wouldn’t be? See, I take this as a very important question, and I will answer it seriously. For me, the hardest things about being a man are: being brave and strong when I feel weak; being honest and direct when I fear the consequences; being opened-minded when it’s more “comfortable” to fall back on old ways of thinking; and being emotionally accessible when old tapes scream at me to avoid the possibility of getting hurt. For me, being a man means facing all these fears and counter-productive tendences forthrightly, honestly and with integrity. Ain’t easy… but essential.

@Austinlad Very nice. Harple landed a good one.

I’m confused, @Adirondackwannabe. Don’t @Austinlad deserve a pistol whipping?

@wundayatta : You do know that you’re allowed to sit, don’t you? Your wife would probably be very pleased. Just sayin.

@Austinlad You can put that back. I said some serious answers are allowed. @wundayatta He conveyed it so well I left the pistol in the holster.

@JilltheTooth All this time on fluther and you still don’t know men very well?

Trying to get women to understand.

Men 100.5. Should be required for all women. ;-P

Attempting, in vain, to get the wife to admit she could just possibly be wrong in any disagreement we may have. Just once would be nice :¬)

Lets face it…...the girls look at the guys and the guys look at the girls. its always been this way, even back to Adam and Eve and that evil apple. i could make a comparison and state that women drivers are much worse than men drivers. but, then i would have to have stats to back me up. also, that women cheat much more than men. again, i would need the states to back me.

So, i will just close, without answering this question.

@john65pennington You don’t need no fucking data! Come on! Be a man! Stand up! ;-P

No! Sit down! ;-)

I think serious answers should be explored, @Adirondackwannabe – there are plenty limitations in terms of gender norms and expectations placed on men and on boys growing up that make them have to conform to something they never feel comfortable about. How about having to hear incessant criticism from any and all woman on the street when you’re parenting your baby at home for the past 2 years because they are too dumb to think that Alex is: 1) probably a more capable parent than they are and 2) he is doing that voluntarily despite his enormous penis which obviously makes it difficult to ever have feelings. (there that last part was tongue in cheek)

I’ll ask the question again for serious answers. You’re correct Simone,, I just was in need of some humor first.

@Adirondackwannabe No, I think people can answer in this question perhaps…I don’t know…I think that if some of the men on fluther wanted to put something serious, they might have despite your caveat. Edit: Also, now that you asked that question, I think people will try to stick funny answers in there because they’re uncomfortable or avoid it all together.

Too late, we’ll have to wait and see. I agree it’s a serious question. You’ve opened my eyes up a lot from where I was before I ever knew who you were. Thanks Simone.

@Adirondackwannabe You’re more than welcome.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir It has had one side affect. When I started looking at the person, and going beyond the fashion industry idea of what’s attractive, I started noticing all of the people that are attractive in their own way. My hormones are taking a major whipping. :)

@Adirondackwannabe Don’t worry, you’ll live longer.

I agree with @Adirondackwannabe about noticing. I always did notice, and wasn’t critical, but didn’t always understand. Now I still might not be critical or understand, but I enjoy the differences more.

I really don’t have too many complaints.

Prostate check ups apparently. :) A male doctor saying, now turn your head and cough or female doctor.
Not thinking their appendage is meant to be a pogo stick.

Somehow the idea of one woman sticking a gloved finger up my butt while another woman watches didn’t really turn me on that much. But I guess that could just be me.

Really, the hardest part for me is that….. oh crap, I’m on the wrong thread.

From years of observance it seems to be putting the new roll of toilet paper onto the spool.

Just sayin’

@Kardamom That’s one of the greatest labor saving inventions of men. If we don’t relace it, chances are she’s going to need it before us and she’ll change the roll for us. It saves hundreds of roll changes over our lifetime. Also works with paper towels.

A real man puts family before himself.

It’s the eating danger and crapping nails stuff. Have you ever tried to pass a nail?

@JeanPaulSartre LMAO!

I once passed a car load of little people and boy did that HURT!!!

Having a conversation with a woman and pretending that I am not thinking about the exposed booberage.

@JeanPaulSartre actually yes…

Oy @Winters – I do not want to know…

What is like to be a man!

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you are a male chauvinist.
If you stay home and do the housework, you are a pansy.

If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
If you don’t work enough, you are a good for nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation.
If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your rear and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her, that is favoritism.
If she gets a job ahead of you, it’s equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks, it’s sexual harassment.
If you keep quiet, it’s male indifference.

If you cry, you are a wimp.
If you don’t, you are an insensitive bastard.

If you make a decision without consulting her, you are a chauvinist.
If she makes a decision without consulting you, she’s a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn’t enjoy, that’s domination.
If she asks you, it’s a favor.

If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear, you are a pervert.
If you don’t, you are a fag.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape, you are a sexist.
If you don’t, you are unromantic.

If you try to keep yourself in shape, you are vain.
If you don’t, you are a slob.

If you are proud of your achievements, you are up yourself.
If you don’t, you are not ambitious.

If she has a headache, she is tired.
If you have a headache, you don’t love her anymore.

If you want it too often, you are oversexed.
If you don’t, there must be someone else.

@JeanPaulSartre are you sure? It makes a fascinating tale for meal times… >:)

I am feeling hungry @Winters…

@JeanPaulSartre actually I was 1 at the time so I don’t remember though my parents apparently do very well.

@BoBo1946 Your post just proves that you are a chauvenistic, good for nothing, lazy, indifferent, insensitive, dominating, perverted, gay, sexist, unromantic, vain, narcissistic, wife hating, cheater! Ha! Did I forget anything? :P I lurve that post!!!

@Winters As a parent, I’m sure they do. ha!

@WillWorkForChocolate loll.. well @janbb just asked a similar question and I got chewed out for posting it. But, thank you so much. Glad you enjoyed it. That was the intent.

Meh, it’s okay. Don’t take it personally, I thought it was funny as hell. And even partially true, when you think about stereotypes and perceptions…

She, and you know who, has never liked me… and I’ve never done anything to this person. Oh well., life is a beach.

Keep smilin’ hon. There are quite a few people here who really hate me. I’m starting to get used to it.

Wait… “you know who”? Voldemort?????

@noelleptc Well, you know that I’m outside your window watching you right now, because I just can’t get enough of you pretty fond of you, too.

@BoBo1946 For what it is worth, I’m a woman and thought it was hilarious. I really haven’t faced any obstacles because of my gender that I was aware of in all of my 49 years.

@noelleptc And I like you.

@bkcunningham i meant nothing by it… it was just something i found and thought people would get a good laugh out of it. Thank you very much.

Trying to piss in the bowl with morning wood.

Other men.