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JLeslie's avatar

If you believe in an afterlife, and I die before my husband, and he remarries, then when we are all dead are we all in heaven together?

Asked by JLeslie (59042points) March 12th, 2011

I just wondered how that works for those who believe they are with their spouse for eternity once you are both dead? Are all the multiple spouses there together?

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45 Answers

Bellatrix's avatar

I guess it will depend on who he loves most? Far out. What a thought? I don’t believe in the hereafter BUT it would be sort of some weird polygamy thing in heaven!!

I have told my husband here, he can have extra wives if he wants as long as they do all the cooking, cleaning and that sort of stuff. I want to keep the conjugal rights for myself. Not sure how that would work out in the hereafter though…. sounds like a lot of trouble to me! Hope the big man has a good relationship counselling service in place!

CaptainHarley's avatar

Christianity teaches that marriage is only an earthly institution.

TexasDude's avatar

I’m not really a believer in this sort of thing, but the way I’ve heard it explained before is that earthly relationships won’t matter anymore and you, your husband, his new wife, and every other former human in the afterlife will be united in the presence and eternal love of God as a purely spiritual being.

Basically, it won’t matter.

JLeslie's avatar

@CaptainHarley I didn’t know that. Very interesting. But, you will see your loved ones in heaven according to Christianity, right?

CaptainHarley's avatar

Yes. At least I surely hope so. : ))

JLeslie's avatar

@CaptainHarley So, all the spouses are there together. Might it not be weird? Are we supposed to have memories of our time on earth?

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard So there would be no jealousy? No pairing of a couple in life after death? A brother, mother, spouse would all be the same in death? Just pure love; I guess that means non-sexual love.

CaptainHarley's avatar

I’m not sure how that will work, but I suspect that your feelings about things will be considerably different! : )

TexasDude's avatar

@JLeslie [Christian mode] There would be no jealousy, anger, sadness or despair over the situation because those emotions are negative and thus cannot exist in the presence of God in the afterlife. There would be no pairing of couples in Heaven because there would be no need as all would be united as one spiritual entity. Additionally, since Heaven is a place of pure joy, it wouldn’t matter anyway. [/christian mode]

SincereNyc's avatar

All depends on what everyone’s personal belief system is, so ultimately yes. One God carries many titles. However, it will not work if one out of the bunch is not a believer.

Buttonstc's avatar

Interestingly enough, the Sadducees asked Jesus a similar question.

It’s described in three of the gospel accounts. The most complete one is in Luke 20:27–36.

To paraphrase briefly: They shall neither marry nor be given in marriage but will me as the angels in Heaven.

JLeslie's avatar

@SincereNyc Of course it depends on someones belief system. I am wondering what people believe, or if they are aware of how various religions look at the matter.

So, you believe if my husband is a believer, but I am not, that we will not see each other in the afterlife?

SincereNyc's avatar

Friend, I am not an expert on all of the religions out there. So from my personal opinion and belief, the answer to your question is no, you will not. If this is truly a heavy weight on your psyche, I advise you to do either of the following: have a dialogue with your husband on this ( not sure what faith he is in, but you might like to investigate with an open mind and join him if or when he goes to service, maybe even visit a non-denominational church – you can go dressed as you are, no special attire needed and speak to any of the ushers there, they will be more than happy to explain and no pressure to join, and listen. If none of the above work for you, crack open the good book (if you don’t have one, theres always the library) and go check out the index for the word heaven. Good Luck to you and God Bless.

anartist's avatar

The afterlife [if a heavenish thing] is not supposed to be corporeal nor can you take the money with you when you go, therefore the problems of ménage à trois or division of property/wealth should not arise [and your children might not appear to be younger than you when they join you]. Whether you feel closer to those you knew/loved/were related to on earth than everyone else hanging about on clouds wearing golden wings is anybody’s guess.
—and if you are just passing through, on the way to the next rebirth—probably nobody else around.

talljasperman's avatar

Till Death do us part… unless you want an Immortal wedding vows

chyna's avatar

You will see your loved ones in heaven, but they will have no title. You won’t know it is your mom,dad, spouse, etc. It will just be someone you love.

Cruiser's avatar

You will be sharing the afterlife with all his past and subsequent lovers. The afterlife is quite the tell all!

starsofeight's avatar

Maybe, it’s like a witness protection program – after all, you will be given a new body, and a new name that only you will know.

As for being like angels, that does not necessarily negate sexual drives – angels did come to earth and mate with women.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

My guess is that it won’t matter. ;)

JLeslie's avatar

@SincereNyc Doesn’t weigh on me at all. I was just curious how other people think about. What started me tinking about it was the show Big Love. I was watching it with my sister, I don’t watch it at home, and we were talking a little and the question came up. We were tinking in terms of Christians (non-Mormons) wondering if they wound up being polygamists in the afterlife if having been married twice here on earth. We said it kind of tongue and cheek. Anyway, it did get me wondering how different people do sort that question uit for themselves, so I thought I would ask fluther. My Initial instinct is to assume the religious might not have thought that through, but my second thought was there probably are thought out answers for the question that have not occurred to me. The answers above satisfy my curiousity.

Spreader's avatar

Virtually every religion and society has embraced the notion that humans continue to exist, or will exist again, after death. Among the many beliefs, which one is true? Many people doubt the existence of an afterlife altogether. Have you been taught that human life continues after death? It a surprise, then, that many people who outwardly are devout believers in the afterlife may inwardly dread being reduced to nothingness at death. Interestingly, in his writings ancient King Solomon ascribed to human death a finality that some may consider frightening.
It is a surprise, then, that many people who outwardly are devout believers in the afterlife may inwardly dread being reduced to nothingness at death. Interestingly, in his writings ancient King Solomon ascribed to human death a finality that some may consider frightening.
In the 3,000-year-old book of Ecclesiastes, Solomon wrote: “The living are conscious that death will come to them, but the dead are not conscious of anything, and they no longer have a reward, because there is no memory of them. Their love and their hate and their envy are now ended.” He added: “Whatever comes to your hand to do with all your power, do it because there is no work, or thought, or knowledge, or wisdom in the place of the dead to which you are going.”—Ecclesiastes 9:5, 6, 10,.Solomon was inspired to say that “the fate of the sons of men and the fate of the beasts is the same. As is the death of one so is the death of the other, All go to one place, all are of the dust, and all will be turned to dust again.”—Ecclesiastes 3:19, 20,
Although written by King Solomon, the above words were inspired by God and form part of his written Word, the Bible. These scriptures, along with many others in the Bible, do not support the popular belief that something inside us survives death to live on in another form. (Ezekiel 18:4)

CaptainHarley's avatar

Solomon also had hundreds of wives and concubines. Are we to assume that this is what God wants us to have as well?

6rant6's avatar

@CaptainHarley I was thinking maybe you just got an extra penis for each extra wife. But then the King Solomon thing. There’s a picture I’m having trouble getting shuck of.

filmfann's avatar

Matthew 22:30. Jesus is asked this very question, and says that in Heaven there is no marriage.

CaptainHarley's avatar

I thought I said that already. : P

seazen_'s avatar

The sad thing about my life is that it’s a living hell incuding my ex and her new hubby – now! —Sorry, I’m flunking. Logging off now….- -Fuck what happens in the after life – I want a little heaven today.

Augs: delete any crap I write – I’ve been drinking and it aint earl grey.

josie's avatar

No. In order for it to work, one of the three will have to accept going to Hell. Since it is two girls vs. one guy, it will probably be the guy.

JLeslie's avatar

@seazen_ If you should die before your wife, God forbid, pah pah (that is me spitting to ward off any evil from my suggestion of you dying first) maybe you will get to haunt her and drive her ‘round the bend? It would be a silver lining for you. I always tell my husband I will haunt him if I should die before him lol, and I like him.

seazen_'s avatar

@JLeslie I have no beef with the bitch my ex; it’s that bastard I’d haunt. I already do, he just doesn’t know it. Ha.

Jeruba's avatar

“Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.” – kjv

“till death us do part” = death ends the marriage

seazen_'s avatar

Yay, then there’s a chance for me and Jeruba to be together…?

Jeruba's avatar

oooh, johnny depp & cate blanchett. there’s a pair i’d love to inhabit.

filmfann's avatar

get a room you two

Harold's avatar

In the New Testament, Jesus was asked a similar question by the Pharisees, and His answer was “In heaven there is no marriage or giving in marriage.” I am satisfied to know that whatever it is, it will be the best.

saywhat's avatar

This world teaches till death do us part period.

smilingheart1's avatar

Love is eternal, but it is the true spiritual love we will have there not the sick thing we sometimes make it here on earth where preadtorship and selfishness prevail. Actually, you will know those you have loved on earth in their truest form in heaven. For the junk of the earth and the way we mortals are with each other will be washed off us.

smilingheart1's avatar

I am not saying marriage is eternal, just true love is eternal. You will love your people at their deepest core level of being. You know how when you are intimate with your spouse now you sometimes want to get even closer than you can, but the body ironically gets in the way. It won’t be that way there – there will be nothing to stop you from “inviting” your loved ones to really know you in your soul in a way they can’t here.

dabbler's avatar

@CaptainHarley is correct. Jesus at some point said that there is no such thing as marriage in the afterlife. Sorry, I don’t have the passage handy, but it’s in the New Testament somewhere.

You and all your spouses will all be there and so full of bliss you won’t care who romped with who after who passed away.

snowberry's avatar

@JLeslie Mormons (which many consider to be Christian) believe that a woman and a man remain married in heaven. And not only that, but if a wife dies and her husband remarries, he’ll have two wives in heaven. The LDS church (“The Mormons,” in the TV advertisements) used to adhere to polygamy, and several sects still do.

By the way, a while ago, Mormons did not want to be known as Christians. That’s a relatively new thing for them.

JLeslie's avatar

@snowberry Is it the same for the woman if she had been married twice? She’ll be with both hisbands and married in the afterlife?

I absolutely consider Mormons to be Christians. I had never heard they didn’t want to be known as Christians, but I believe you, I just was unaware of it. Maybe it has to do with the religion growing more and more, and many in the church basically being intermixed with society. In the US it is useful to be a Christian, as much as some Christians say they feel oppressed and that their rights are being trampled on (I was just talking about this on another Q). When I say “Christians” when talking about politics and religion I actually don’t mean Catholics or Mormons. Sometimes I actually specify to exclude Catholics, I usually don’t think to mention Mormons, but I don’t think people really consider them much in those conversations anyway. It’s because to me the voting habits and experience of Catholics, especially compared to Protestants in the bible belt, is often very different. Catholics tend to live in parts of the country that are much more diverse, but that is changing as people move more, and Catholics still know what it is like to be a minority. They remember people not liking Kennedy because he was a Catholic, or they are actually a minority in some other way. They know if a bible was taught in school it would not be the Catholic version. Mormons also I believe understand for the same reasons.

My experience with Mormons is very positive. A couple friends at school, a friend of mine I met as an adult, and a former coworker. I’ve met others, but these people I had some sort of long term friendship/relationship with.

snowberry's avatar

@JLeslie I’m not sure, not being Mormon. I do know that they have 7 different levels of heaven, and that a wife won’t be able to advance any higher in heaven than her husband. I would assume then, that she’d be married in heaven to the last one, but who knows? It doesn’t make a lick of sense to me.

Mormon theology tends to change a bit over the years.

talljasperman's avatar

Not necessary; You can all be in hell together.

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