General Question

RTT's avatar

Should I ask my girlfriend to remove her hairs on her chest?

Asked by RTT (268points) March 25th, 2011

I love my girlfriend a lot and when I kiss her, I do not like to kiss hair.Should I ask her to remove the hair or just leave the hair along?

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48 Answers

Seelix's avatar

How much hair are we talking here? If it’s peach fuzz, just deal with it. If she’s a little more hirsute, it might be worth addressing.

SpatzieLover's avatar

How long have you dated?

A nicer way, if you’ve been together a while is to inquire as to whether she’s ever considered laser hair removal. That way you could offer to pay for the permanent removal without ever bringing up the chest hair as a gift.

JmacOroni's avatar

She might want to see a doctor, rather than an aesthetician. There are several medical reasons that could include hirsutism as a symptom. Typically, women don’t have much hair on their chest.

Plucky's avatar

As @Seelix asked, how much and what type of hair are you talking about? Does she have “manly” chest hair? If she is rather hairy, is she aware of it? If she has a lot of hair (not peach fuzz), it can be related to hormonal imbalances and the like. There are also many medications that cause increased hair growth.

Seelix's avatar

@JmacOroni has a good point. It’s not all that normal for a woman to have enough hair on her chest that it’d be bothersome.

I mean, we all have teensy hairs all over our bodies, and some women tend to have slightly thicker hairs around their nipples (in the same way that some women have slightly thicker hair on their lower bellies), but I have to wonder whether she really is hairy or whether you’re just being picky.

Have you noticed this with other girlfriends, or just this one?

JmacOroni's avatar

@Seelix also brings up a good point, if this hair is around her nipples, you should not ask her to remove it. Removing hair from the nipples can introduce infection, and it is generally advised to leave it alone.

math_nerd's avatar

This could go two ways if you ask. Both will result in you not having to deal with the hairy chest anymore.

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Ladymia69's avatar

If you try to sheepishly tell her she needs to shave her flipping chest, she will hate you. Why don’t you just yank them out while she is sleeping?~

Seriously though, I am glad my husband isn’t grossed out over little things like this. Have you asked her if anything about your body is offensive to her? Just wondering. :)

hug_of_war's avatar

I think this is weird truthfully. I’ve never heard of a woman having a hairy chest who didn’t have some other hormonal things goingg on.

math_nerd's avatar

@hug_of_war – Like previously being a man?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

This is going to sound rude, but why the hell are men so hung up on women having hair on their bodies? You do realize that’s how we’re born, and it’s how (if you’re a “believer”) we were “created”, right? You do realize that some of us women may get frustrated with male pubes getting stuck in our teeth when we go down on you, right? Or sucking your nipples that are covered in hair…

If you truly love her, you’ll keep your mouth shut about it.

Ladymia69's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Damn skippy! We put up with all that hair on the boys! Why? Because love is stronger than hair!

gorillapaws's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate it’s also natural to not wipe your ass after you defecate, but there are certain grooming/hygiene requests that men and women can reasonably request of each other.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

WHAT? It’s not natural to not wipe your ass. Before toilet paper, people used leaves, water and other methods to clean their backsides. (A lot of people prefer water over toilet paper anyway. It’s called a bidet.) It is NOT a natural thing to leave shit on your ass. It’s unsanitary.

There’s nothing unsanitary about hair. If my husband demanded that I shave my jayjay, I’d demand that he shave his sac.

josie's avatar

You 100% certain she is a girl?

El_Cadejo's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate I dont see anything wrong with the mutual shaving thing. I mean hair is nasty and no one wants hair in their mouth. But yeaaa hairy chest. Bad enough on a guy but just picturing a girl…. You cant say thats natural.

gorillapaws's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate animals in nature don’t wipe their ass. It’s part of human culture to do so. Just like cutting your hair, trimming your fingernails and shaving your legs. I certainly think if he expects you to groom, then you can likewise have similar expectations of your partner.

lbwhite89's avatar

@uberbatman Considering the amount of disgusting habits of men that women deal with, what disgusts me is that men expect women to do things like shave their bodies in order to please them. If you don’t like hair, then find a new girl. If you actually love the person, you won’t care. And saying hair is nasty is ignorant. Unless you completely shave your entire body, everyone has hair. Whether it’s peach fuzz or woolly mammoth fur, all of our bodies have hair.

And it IS natural if she has it in the absence of any hormonal imbalance or other condition. How exactly is it natural to shave hair off of your body? I doubt Adam and Eve came equipped with razor blades and shaving cream.

Personally, I won’t let my guy come near me unless I’m nice and smooth and generally hairless from the waist down. However, that doesn’t mean that men should expect that. I’m certain this girl is aware of the hair on the chest. I, for one, commend her for not hiding her body due to something like that. More power to her for being that confident in herself.

If the asker isn’t man enough to deal with a little hair, then he should get out of the relationship as opposed to asking this girl to change her appearance for him. I’m quite sure that the she’d like to change some things about his body as well.

None of us are perfect. People need to learn which battles are worth fighting and which aren’t when it comes to relationships.

[Excuse my rant. I’m far from a feminist, but the double standard when it comes to things like this drives me crazy. Men, I swear!]

boffin's avatar

Picky picky…
Instant [Dental Floss]
Win Win

laureth's avatar

See also this question for why it might be not the best thing to ask for.

I’ll ask you the same question I asked in that one: would you shave your chest (or other nether-bits) for her?

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Bellatrix's avatar

Well this question got everyone going. To @RTT obviously you need to be very sensitive about how you handle this one. Have you been seeing her long? I do actually think it is a testament to her self-esteem that she isn’t insecure about having chest hair so it does beg the question (already asked) how much hair are we talking about here and is there a medical reason why it might be there.

If you have been together for a longish time, perhaps ask her about it but you could open a can of worms. If you care about her though, you either need to ignore the hair or ask her about it.

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Bellatrix's avatar

Actually @uberbatman the original poster is commenting on chest hair not hair on his girlfriend’s genitals.

El_Cadejo's avatar

@Mz_Lizzy Your right, my bad. Though still I was talking about body hair in general which im evidently quite ignorant for finding unattractive.

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Nullo's avatar

I think that it’s perfectly reasonable for a couple to make aesthetic requests of one another.

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buster's avatar

If she was my girlfriend and it bothered me it wouldn’t be a question but a demand. Bitch get in there and wax your tits and mustache. I told you never to slack on that. Don’t you listen to a word I say? You are to be looking very sexy not beary sexy. Don’t cut your eyes at me like that either or the restraints, flog ,and gimp masked are about to be imposed on you. NOW GET IN THERE AND SHAVE WAX BLOW TORCH PLUG THEM ALREADY! Im kidding but I trim my junk and get my girl to occasinally wax or pluck my caterpillar legs off my eyebrows because she tries and always to be her sexiest for me and I try and give her the same. IF your cool with it and the other partner is go ahead and call each other Yogi and BooBoo during sex.

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betterbird's avatar

Noooooo. Why ruin a healthy relationship?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@gorillapaws Well that clears a LOT up right there, because I’m a human. I’m not an unsanitary, wild animal. It may not be “natural” for gorillas to wipe their asses, but it’s sure as hell “natural” for humans to do so. Cleaning fecal matter off your behind is NOTHING like getting rid of unwanted body hair, as the hair is not unsanitary. There’s a ginormous difference between unsightly and unsanitary. Thank goodness my husband is smart enough to realize that and not make stupid demands. I shave my armpits and legs. When I feel like it, I trim and sculpt the jayjay. Completely shaving it is uncomfortable and makes me itch. I don’t shave it anymore, problem solved. A man’s desires do NOT and will NEVER be more important than my own comfort. Some poor bastards just think their wants should come first, and I pity their women.

@uberbatman Hair is not “nasty”. We’re born with it, it grows. Some people don’t find it to be attractive, but it’s not “nasty”. I also find it odd that many men who think a hairy jayjay is gross are the same men who want their women to have long hair on their head, and call them “dikes” when they cut it short. If the hair itself is “nasty”, but the woman is comfortable with it, that makes the woman “nasty” too. And calling a woman “nasty” is a whole different ballgame.

El_Cadejo's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate well, I find it fucking nasty. sure it grows but that doesnt mean I need to be attracted to it. I realize as mammals we have hair covering pretty much every part of our body but when its thick and dark in certain regions thats a sure turn off. I do like women with long hair but I also find women with really short hair incredibly attractive so I suppose I dont fit your stereotype in that regard. Dont be mistaken though, Im not calling said woman nasty. I wont hold anything against them if they decide hey, ya know what, I like having hair, I feel its a more natural approach or whatever. Thats totally fine, and thats their decision to make, it just is a total game changer as far as im concerned with the idea of attractiveness.

mattbrowne's avatar

If it doesn’t bother her, it shouldn’t bother you.

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augustlan's avatar

[mod says] Flame off, folks. No need to make this personal.

Thammuz's avatar

Holy shit I would never have expected a topic like this to get so heated. FFS people, some guys like it hairy, some like it shaved and the same goes for women, what’s so fucking hard to understand? Jesus!

Well, that all depends on how intimate you are and how hairy the situation is (sorry, had to make that pun, it’s probably the tenth time someone made it in the thread but I don’t care.). If you usually tell eachother what bothers you up front, then go for it.

Personally, I made it my personal privilege to shave my girlfriend’s legs because I like having an excuse to touch them more, so maybe you could go that route and make it something she might even enjoy, or maybe that’s just me and it’s weird and creepy to the rest of the world, i don’t know.

tinyasiangirl's avatar

If it bothers you, you should be able to talk to her about it! Just express how you feel about it and if she can’t handle the truth then maybe you shouldn’t be with her.. :/

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