General Question

richardhenry's avatar

How do we tell our friend that he has really bad body odour?

Asked by richardhenry (12651points) April 22nd, 2008 from iPhone

We have a friend who clearly has a sweat problem, but other than that he’s really attractive. How do we tell him? Or what should we suggest?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

20 Answers

wildflower's avatar

Try a subtle approach…..ask him quietly if he forgot to put on deodorant today.
If he doesn’t get the hint, mention it a few days later, say it doesn’t seem like his current deodorant is working for him and he should try switching.

Whatever you do, try not to put it on him directly – the deodorant is a great fall guy!

irishcurls's avatar

I had a friend I had to tell this to. Shes a close and dear friend. I just told her. I made a slight fib saying that one point I had a friend tell me something simmiler and that I learned I had to start outing more deoderant then some people for some reason or another. There is no easy way to tell someone that, just come from love.

irishcurls's avatar

wildflowers answer is good

wildflower's avatar

I actually had a friend with the same issue…..she wasn’t aware at all, but once we told her, she was very happy we did and asked for help finding solutions…...she did have a perspiration problem.

afghanmoose's avatar

tell him old spice came out with an awsome new deodarant and that u got one for yourself and him to use,watch him use it while u use it

Babo's avatar

How about, “Dude, you smell!”

spendy's avatar

Okay…you mentioned body odour and excessive sweating. Is it one or both?

The odour problem, I believe wildflower has a great solution for. Don’t put it on him – he may or may not know and may be self-conscious. No one likes to hear they stink. :)

If he also has a sweating problem, he probably just isn’t sure what to do about it. When you sweat all the time, you feel it and it shows on your clothes. I can guarantee you he isn’t sweating profusely without noticing it himself! I actually had this problem myself – no odour, just a perspiration issue. My glands are extremely over-active. The best solution I’ve found is botox. They put powder on your underarms that reacts when you sweat and highlights your most active glands…then they inject botox in a graph over the active areas. It lasts about 6 months…just long enough to get through summer (which is my problem season). You might look into it (Google it or whatever) and print out some stuff to share with him…it’s not super expensive and he’ll probably thank you for it. If he’s not hip on the idea, there’s always medication or medicated anti-perspirant.

richardhenry's avatar

@spendywatson: The problem is both, unfortunately. Some really good ideas there, thanks!

peedub's avatar

What about humor? Perhaps you can say something to him like “yo that Tom’s of Main just isn’t cutting it, dude. You might wanna drop ‘Calendula’ scent and switch to “Ice Dive” [or insert some other obnoxiously strong-sounding deodorant].

loser's avatar

go with the babo answer

allknowingone's avatar

well if hes a close friend or even just a friend I would just tell him

peedub's avatar

You can always try to out-stink him until he complains.

richardhenry's avatar

@peedub: Then do what, tell him how ironic it is? Lol. :)

wildflower's avatar

well that way, when he approaches you about it, just say you look up to him and try to follow his example :)

peedub's avatar

I don’t know, make him aware that it kinda blows and perhaps makes eating food not as pleasant. Although he might think it’s cool, so who knows.

richardhenry's avatar

Hmm, how about an anonymous email? If we made afriendwhoreallycaresforyou@googlemail.com… it seems like a cop out, but I’m thinking it would really help avoid embarrassment for him. We really do reckon he’d be pretty embarrassed.

peedub's avatar

That’s a great idea [mental note]. It sure beats and intervention.

scamp's avatar

He may suffer from a medical condition called hyperhidosis. here are some articles on it that you could send him in your e-mail.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperhidrosis
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/sweating-and-body-odor/DS00305/DSECTION=1

Odds are if he sweats profusely, he already knows, but may not know what to do about it. The articles have some remedies he could try.

breedmitch's avatar

I think if I got an anonymous email from one of my “friends” telling me I smelled bad I would be paranoid. Not only would I forever be self-concious about my body odor (medical condition or not), but I would always be wondering which of my friends sent it. I couldn’t live with the mystery. Having to look at each of them thinking “Was it you?” would just be too much.
If you’re going to say something, do it face to face.
Grow a pair.

scamp's avatar

@breedmitch I agree. I know someone that got an anonymous note and he reacted just the way you stated. But if the asker doesn’t’ feel comfortable with the face to face thing, a carefully worded e-mail may be better than not telling him at all.

Answer this question

Login

or

Join

to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
or
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther