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Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

Which gender do you think has the most self-esteem issue, Guys or girls? Why?

Asked by Vincent_Lloyd (3007points) April 27th, 2011

I’ve been thinking lately….A lot of girls have self-esteem issues….I’m honestly counting my girlfriend as a suspect to it since…It’s true, she was raised in her family…In a…Bad way. She was put down, she’s had it rough…But now that I’m in her life now, and I’m hers. I’m trying to rebuild that confidence she has…Same with me, I have low self-esteem too…But overall which sex do you think has that issue more? Honestly I think more of girls do since of appearances…Popularity in some points….But the whole world has issues, and not having any confidence is to me, a major issue. So…which one fluther? Me and her are on the same page with it.

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17 Answers

TexasDude's avatar

Pretty much every girl I know, even the most ludicrously beautiful ones, have some type of body image issue. I don’t like making generalizations, and I’m sure someone will come along soon to give a much more nuanced answer than mine, but I’d say that women seem to have more self-esteem issues with men, though it’s hard to tell because males are typically socialized to suppress their feelings.

Winters's avatar

Both do, it just depends on the individual on how they show it and/or cope with it.

creative1's avatar

I think girls do they given all of these images in magazines and media of how they are suppose to look and such that are so unrealistic because they have been touched up or corrected so when a girl looks at it they think they need to be perfect like that or need to be that thin or need long legs as the picture when all of that has been edited in order for greatest sex appeal and the sad thing this works for the men too. When an untouched photo is used its made out that they are fat or unattractive. its so sad. Look at what people does to and star and all of those rags do to the stars…

Vunessuh's avatar

I want to say that women do, but I think that’s only because the way some women handle self-esteem issues is more serious and drastic, therefore more noticeable than how a man would handle any insecurities they have. For example, some insecure men will usually just be really cocky and arrogant and overcompensate for whatever they feel is missing, while women are more likely to self-harm in some way, shape or form and be more emotional and sensitive. I think most people deal with self-esteem issues at some point in their lives. I don’t think it’s a question of which gender has the most self-esteem issues, but rather the difference in how these issues are handled.

Pandora's avatar

I think both do, only girls are usually more vocal about their feelings and boys are taught no to complain. Teens in particular seem to have the highest self esteem issues. Which is not surprising with fluctuating hormones and extreme body changes and peer pressure. I think it gets less through the years as men get older and women continue on with self esteem issues as they age because aging seems to be a sin. Unless your a guy. Men are considered to be more experienced and distiguished if they take care of themselve. Women are just considered older, like bad rippen fruit.

filmfann's avatar

A pretty girl in a nice outfit walks into a High School party.
Who checks her out more?
Girls. They are massively self critical, and over-sensitive.

SABOTEUR's avatar

It’s a full time job maintaining my own self-esteem issues; it’s never occurred to me to poll anyone else’s.

I’m just sayin…

roundsquare's avatar

From what I’ve heard its probably girls. I’ve heard (from someone who knows about this stuff) that, for example, men and women take feedback at work differently. If you tell a woman that she did 10 great things and 1 bad, she’ll focus on the bad. If you tell a man he did 10 bad things and 1 great, he’ll focus on the great. Obviously its a generalization, but it fits with waht other people have said (e.g. even ridiculously beautiful girls find the one thing about their body they don’t like).

marinelife's avatar

I don’t think self-esteem issues have much to do with gender, but if you are just counting, I think women have more of them.

Facade's avatar

Women, definitely. Everything around us tells us we’re not good enough. It’s hard not to listen.

blueiiznh's avatar

From my experience I would state females.
There is sooooo much pressure put in front of them from them in the form of movies, TV, ads, clothing, friends, etc that makes them feel this way.
Most people want to be liked and have friends and not feel like they are left out. It starts at a young age and they are very sensative to it.
I have a beautiful healthy 10 yr old daughter and she gets down on herself at times. It does encroach on her self-esteem at times.

wundayatta's avatar

Women may have a lot of pressure to look good, but men have a lot of pressure to “be a man.” I have no way on knowing how many guys feel insecurity about their manhood, but I’m sure it’s a lot. I would guess it’s as many as women. I think men hide it behind those stoic, manly faces. In fact, I now automatically assume that anyone who takes pains to be manly is hiding some insecurity. If you were secure, you wouldn’t care what other people think, and there would be so much more variety of masculine behavior.

The more macho the guy, the more I think they’re hiding their insecurities. A secure man is not afraid to show his weaknesses. If you try to hide them, that means you’re afraid that people could hurt you if they knew about them. I find that if you admit your weaknesses, people trust you more and they like you better and you have more credibility. They also often understand that it is a sign of real strength to stand up before a bunch of guys who are obsessed with masculinity and to tell them your weaknesses and not show your fear of being teased. They really have no idea what to do with it.

Hibernate's avatar

Women ... and that’s mostly based on how many beauty products are out there [ if they don’t look top knotch .. well there you go with all the others ]

roundsquare's avatar

Woo hoo! Consensus!

takaboom's avatar

Women. Or rather females.
I think more males have it than what most people would think, but certain more females than males any day.

ddude1116's avatar

Women and men have probably an equal amount of self-esteem issues, but men are more subtle regarding theirs. Women have pressure to look fantastic (which they succeed at, usually). Men have pressure to interact with women by being charming and handsome. It’s the men who are expected to make the first move (in my cases..) and that’s damn unpleasant, instigation is unpleasant. Both genders have to stumble through lust, and the opposite gender as a whole. Women and men have the same amount of pressure, the issues are different because the gender is different, but they exist. Simply, men are more stoic.

rooeytoo's avatar

This question reminds me of the movie The Full Monty, that part where the fat ugly guy criticizes the gorgeous woman because her breasts are too big. That pretty much says it all, women are constantly being judged not by what they are or what they have accomplished in life, rather by the one thing they have little control over, their looks.

I agree with @wundayatta that men are judged by their “manliness” but at least that is something you can alter or fake, it is hard to fake beauty.

So I think women have more self esteem issues due to the culture in which we live.

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