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Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

If the person you love lost their memories...How would you try and have them regain what they remember about you?

Asked by Vincent_Lloyd (3007points) June 1st, 2011

Well I went over this with my girlfriend since she had a head injury and got into a car accident so she could lose her memory sometime in her future life…But she asked me “If I came up with amnesia and I didn’t remember you and we were in the hospital…How would you have me remember you, Vin?” I gave her the answer to look in her phone…All the text message’s, all of our pictures, my boxers and jacket that I gave her (she asked for them) my poem that I’ve written her on my heart, her soon to be necklace I’m about to give her, my ring, facebook, her websites she has (has Stuff from up to the end of 2009 written about me to now)...And more stuff to come. I need her to remember me… If she had lost her memories. But what would you do?

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14 Answers

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

Through music,art and perfume.:)

YARNLADY's avatar

My son lost a great deal of his memory due to a severe stroke four years ago. He has asked me to scan all the photos I have of him growing up and such. He won’t regain any lost memories, but will build new ones.

Cruiser's avatar

Music, Hallmark Cards and skipping stones.

chewhorse's avatar

I would be quite happy just to start all over with her once again.. The dating, the romancing.. The question.. and this time there would be no mistakes. Imagine, two life memories! And if sometime in the future she naturally regains her memory back and recalls that first life, then that much more to celebrate.

Hibernate's avatar

I’ve seen this in my family a while ago.

After 2 persons interconnects and they are really are soul mates they would definitely know each other. When she was in the hospital and couldn’t even remember her name when we went and visit she knew perfectly who her husband was. She didn’t know his name / occupation etc etc but she knew that he was her husband and that she could trust him with her life.

I don’t know how one can make another remember who they are…

@Vincent_Lloyd sorry but all the messages on her phone / clothes you gave could be from other people . ONLY pictures of you together can make her feel some relief because she can see herself there [ and this only after seeing herself in the mirrors a few times or else she won’t admit that she’s there in the pictures ^^ ]

Bellatrix's avatar

Interesting question Vincent. I don’t really know the answer. Photos obviously, music we have loved together, talking about experiences we have had together. Telling him stories about our life so far. I agree with @lucillelucillelucille about perfume and smells for me… my husband has no sense of smell though, poor bugger! I still say, “oh doesn’t that smell wonderful” and he throws me withering looks :D So, smell probably won’t help him. I hope I never have to experience this and that my family doesn’t have to go through this either. I hope your girlfriend also doesn’t lose her memory.

Stinley's avatar

My daughter has a terrible memory and I sometimes feel sad that she doesn’t remember things that we did together. There’s nothing wrong with her, my husband is somewhat like this too. Annoyingly she does remember the few slightly traumatic things that happened to her like the time 4 years I was late home and the school bus had dropped her off already and she had to wait for 5 minutes by herself! And I never talk about that incident. The things that she does remember are if we have a photo and have talked about it. I’m not convinced she remembers the actual event though. So using photos to recreate memories seems to work.

6rant6's avatar

I would talk to her about herself – what drives her to do the things she wants to do, what she’s afraid of, what it is about her that people respect.

I happen to be the world’s leading expert on her.

And by coincidence it’s her favorite subject.

wundayatta's avatar

I’m not sure I would try to help them regain memories. I think I’d try to help them build from where they are now.

I think we are so used to recordings that allow us to play the same thing over and over, that that’s all that occurs to us. But I come from a world where we play music that is made once, and is not recorded and never will be heard again. It’s improvisational music.

Sometimes I get a sense of loss. OMG! That was so beautiful! I wish I could hear it again. But it’s gone. And that reminds me to appreciate what is here, now, and not be thinking about doing it again.

If someone lost their memories, I think that trying to reconstruct them might be a bit disrespectful. This person is who they are now and who they will be going forward. To force feed them things that are designed to make them into the person they are in our memories doesn’t seem right to me.

We are all new people every moment of our lives. If you want to remember history, then you go look at the records. But I wouldn’t make anyone look at things unless they asked for them.

TheIntern55's avatar

@lucillelucillelucillie is right; I heard that the best way to revive a memory is through smell. I asked my boyfriend what I should do if he lost his memory and he said just to kiss him and he was bound to remember me.

Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

@TheIntern55 yeah that’s what my girlfriend said. Just to kiss her and that she’ll surely remember since I’m her first kiss…We’ve had a lot of firsts.

SatouKimu's avatar

well. for me….. its a hard question.
I asked my boyfriend and friends numerous of times, and I just think that if you’ve shown her so much of this, and she doesn’t remember… so be it.
I assure you it will hurt you, but this might be difficult for her. In her shoes, it would be a complete stranger convincing her that you’re in love, and she doesn’t remember.

The conclusion I came up with is to convince her again. If that person fell in love with me, then I can do it again.
I know it isn’t really helpful, but thats what I think? sorry if it wasn’t what you were looking for though.

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Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

@penny_blas Mmhmm!! That’s exactly what she does too! She has numerous pages of stuff about me. And numerous pages of our names in hearts and stuff like that.

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