Social Question

Dutchess_III's avatar

Do you ever find yourself in a position where you have to turn down an invitation from a friend because what she is inviting you to bores you to death and it's pointless (in your opinon)?

Asked by Dutchess_III (46811points) June 25th, 2011

I’m thinking of those awful home parties. You know, where every body gathers at the person’s house and you look through catalogs, and if you buy this much the hostess gets this much….I mean, they’re selling over-priced, cheap-o home decor crap. Cheap mirrors to put on the wall. Wrought iron candle holders to mount on the wall. Metal picture frames and crap. Junk. And they serve you stale cookies to boot.

I feel bad when I turn down the invitation, like I’m letting a friend down but it’s a total waste of time for me and I do not enjoy it. And I am not going to waste my money!

Long ago I had a friend who did that pretty consistently, and I politely went a few times. The last time I had my four-year-old daughter with me. I told her where we were going and she said, “Oh. One of those party things where you never buy anything?”
I had to laugh…AND wake up. Just say No.

I just had a new friend invite me to a Tupperware thinger. I already declined her internet offer, and now she’s sent me a mail invite.

: (

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10 Answers

MyNewtBoobs's avatar

Yes. I just say sorry, but I can’t make it. I don’t have to elaborate on the “can’t” being because I don’t want to, not because I already have plans. So what? Just because they’re my friend doesn’t mean I have to go to everything they ever invite me to.

Aster's avatar

Luckily, I don’t get invited to those anymore. Once I got a trio of plastic, pink wall butterflies. LOL !
If I did go, it would simply be that I want to spend time with friends. No other reason. But if you don’t buy anything the hostess gives you THAT LOOK.

tedibear's avatar

The only one of these that I found useful was Pampered Chef, because they do have some good items. Otherwise, I’m with all of you. I politely say no thank you and move on.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

Yep! They all know how I feel about them,yet they still try,and I still say no.:)

zenvelo's avatar

Miss Manners is pretty clear: “parties” like that are not social events, but are business events. So no one should feel guilt over declining a request to spend money.

If it is someone you enjoy spending time with, you can decline, say you can’t make it but you’d like to meet her for lunch, dutch treat.

creative1's avatar

I just let all my friends know I am just not interested in the things and just show me the catalog and if I am interested in anything I will let them know. I was honest with them about just not liking the products at such parties and as @tedibear said the only one I like is Pampered Chef and I do actually order from they have some really nice things. Oh and another is Cutco Knives however I they are really really expensive knives but well worth it because they are the sharpest things you will ever use.

rebbel's avatar

I too just go for the “I don’t like those parties, but Ihope you have fun. ” method.
With the added advantage that you’ll never be invited for them again.

LuckyGuy's avatar

A party is not a party if you are expected to buy something. When asked, my answer is absolutely consistent. I say, “Sorry, I make it a point to never attend those. I’d be delighted to go out to dinner with you another night so we can catch up on things.”
Tupperware, insurance, financial planning, Amway….It doesn’t matter. I never attend.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

No, I don’t have friends involved in those sort of deals and if they are then they keep it from me because they know I hate that kind of stuff.

I’m with @zenvelo, I’d decline but ask for a friend-on-friend meetup at a later date.

Coloma's avatar

Yes, I have an ‘ex’ friend that always wanted me to come over for family parties where it always turned into gossipy debates about everyone who was NOT present. Gah!

I also do not like attending weddings of people I don’t know well etc. It feels like a gift roundup, invite as many people as you can, even if you barely know them so you get more presents. haha

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