General Question

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

What is the way to introduce myself and make friends when I am shy?

Asked by nailpolishfanatic (6612points) July 14th, 2011

My friend and I applied to go to the same school next semester but unfortunately she didn’t get accepted, so I will be alone in school. I am quite sad because I know no one there and I am starting to panic. I am a very shy person when I first get to know people, but my friends say I am not shy at all, which I don’t understand because I consider myself shy. I think I know myself a little better than they know me. So yeah, I am going to this school where I know no one… I am going to try and have a great time so I don’t need to think of changing schools again next semester and maybe just even graduate from there. My aim is not to be popular but have friends that I can rely on and trust. I need me some real people and not total plastics. What is your advice?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

15 Answers

desiree333's avatar

I am also quite shy and am not the type to go up to people and introduce myself. If you can’t do it either, I suggest at least smile at people and make yourself look approachable. Make it obvious that you are just shy, not an anti-social asshole. I find if you can’t go up to people, let them come to you.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Get someone else to be our “introducer”. made-up a word
Works for me. They must be known within the group or it will not work.

I’m in the process of joining a group, that is new to me. The membership chair was walking me around before the meeting last night, met fifteen people in ten minutes.

athenasgriffin's avatar

Open up your body language: don’t cross your arms, don’t cross your legs, keep your hair out of your face. Smile. Someone will eventually say hello to you, and when they do, try to be enthusiastic and find common ground. Common problems unite people, so if you can find something to commiserate on (Be it the awful parking situation or an annoying roommate) then you can build onto other topics.

Eventually, you will gain enough confidence to be the one who says hello. Make sure you have a couple of topics of conversation so you don’t blank. Have fun!

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

@desiree333 LOL “anti-social asshole” I imagined myself your face expression and how you said it lol. I am a weird person I know. But the thing is that sometimes when you just smile people may think you are flirting or something. Also some never even say “hi”. Maybe they are expecting me to do it…

@Tropical_Willie I am happy for you. 15 people that´s great!
So should I maybe talk to the school chancellor about finding me a person to be my “introducer” for the first week or something?

@athenasgriffin Ahh about that. Will try it :I

Response moderated (Writing Standards)
WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

“Hi, my name is ______, and I’m a nail polish fanatic!”

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

@Tay122 Will keep that minds. And wow that sucks. I can’t imagine how I would make it through the first months…

@WillWorkForChocolate LOL i think they would think of me as a freak or something.

tedibear's avatar

They might think you’re a freak, but you might also get some cool nail polish out of it.

Seriously, just smile and be open to conversations. I think that @athenasgriffin has given you great advice. Therefore, I will not repeat it!

Bellatrix's avatar

Freaky in a nice way is fine. I am not really shy but I don’t like being on my own in groups of people I don’t know and also find it hard to break the ice sometimes. Look for someone on their own or in a smaller group. I ask questions. If people are not likely to be from the local area? Where are you from? How are you managing to find your way around? Be honest if you are confused. Wow, how are you are managing to find your way about campus? I am totally confused. “Have you met any of your new teachers and what do you think of them?” Try to ask open-ended questions that generate some conversation. Smile and as @athenasgriffin said, try to keep your body language open.

Eggie's avatar

be yourself. Love yourself and confidently talk to people. The best way to overcome fear is to face it.

dogkittycat's avatar

Compliment someone who looks friendly, not flashy or glamorous about their shoes, shirt, what have you. You can typically start a conversation easily enough with little problems or touchy subjects coming up.

desiree333's avatar

@nailpolishfanatic I’m glad to have made you laugh. This is the face I was thinking of. I agree, I only smile if someone is looking at me, and only in a polite way. Otherwise it would probably look like I am leering on them.

@WillWorkForChocolate That line is sure to make them popular, lol!

chokolatcake's avatar

Who cares what people think of you! I use to be so shy I’d literally get sick and chuck, but who do you need to impress?! no one! but your self. Crack stupid jokes, be positive! :)
EVERY ONE gets shy so don’t be afraid to smile first when you make eye contact! :) People usually don’t smile because they are just as shy. Be confident too, just let loose.

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

@All, thanks guys. Now I’ve been 2–3 weeks in school and so far its all going well. I’ve found a good group of friends. It started with this one girl that Im with in two classes, she chatted me up and introduced me to 3 of her friends and from there I found out that two of them were with me in French class and now we all sit together :D
Everything is going quite well as of now thanks to you! <3

Answer this question

Login

or

Join

to answer.

This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.

Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
or
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther