How do you respond to drunk texts?

Invite them over and then proceed from there :)

@FutureMemory Lol not really an option in this particular case.

Ignore for now. Respond once they’re sober.

If they insist on an answer: Not tonight.

I would put them up on this awesome site

Without the names of course.

LOL! I’ve never experienced a drunken text, but there were a few guys that used to do what we referred to as ‘Drink & Dial’. When Dad was diagnosed with cancer and I was living 1000 miles away, these late night callers got an earful, including the slamming of the phone receiver.

@Pied_Pfeffer That’s why we have Friends Don’t Let Friends Drunk Dial. Unfortunately, it’s spread to texts, tweets, and blogging. And you can’t really hang up on a text!! I wish you could, though.

I’ve been known to send a drunk text or two (or hundred) in my day.

That said, I always respond to them with good humor.

As for someone trying to, eh, “mate.” I quote the magic 8 ball: ask again later.

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard Ok, so what exactly is “good humor”? Because it’s taking all I’ve got to not be mean and lay out how when someone is so drunk they’d sleep with Kathy Bates, it’s not really a compliment when they say they’d sleep with you.

You don’t need to have the last word.

Tell them ‘piss off, you’re drunk’

But how can you know when you receive a drunk sms?

I’ve gotten a few. Most uncomfortable one was from a student emailing my student-access email and saying, “I miss you… all I want is to be with you.” I figured he was drunk because it was 2 AM, so I didn’t reply or acknowledge it. He couldn’t make eye-contact with me for a couple weeks.

If it is a good friend, I’ll tease them, but I usually just wait until the next day, around noon, and say “Hey…?” A lot depends on who and what’s being said.

@Hibernate, if they’re making lots of typos and rambling, it’s kinda obvious.

@Aethelflaed ignore them, then?

@Hibernate Well, when the texts are slurred, like these real examples, you can usually tell: “how is it that i’m the only one who doens’t need to be on the flor right now? i’m always the one the flor?” “i pry have an ulcer from drinking too mcuh” “i pry have an ulcer from drinking too mcuh”. Also, he started the text with “I’m totally drunk”, so that was really my first clue.

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard That seems wise. Much more wise than a friends suggestion of replying “im durnk too and u wre bad at sxey tiems.” He was bad at the sexy times, though….

@linguaphile Lol wow, that does sound uncomfortable.

I would just say nonsensical things to completely fuck with their heads.

@linguaphile well I see.

@Aethelflaed but if he’s able to text he’s not drunk he’s just under the influence of alcohol.

I tell the MIL that I don’t fancy her & have no intention of “caressing her neck with my tender soft lips.” I mean really, the nerve of some people!

I don’t get drunk text’s but I have had a few PM’s here from hammered Jellies. ;)

I’ve sent a few and received a bunch of drunk texts. The reeeeally unwanted one came a few weeks ago from my ex who said “I still love you. I messed up. You’re so perfect and I’m sorry.” I got it in the morning and I just responded with “ewwwwwwww barf” problem solved.

Write back something like “seiru crugle wirr h@io9!”

@Hibernate I promise you, you can be both falling down drunk and text. Also, when people tell me they’re drunk, I take them at their word.

Symbeline don’t text.

I also don’t receive texts, unless it’s from my provider telling my run time is expired lol. I suppose I’d tell them to go to bed.

However, seeing the atrocity that is texting, I really would have no idea if someone was drunk or not when they texted me, unless I knew beforehand they were going out to get smashed. I’d look at em though, in case an emergency came up for them.