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Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

What would it take for you to become a sex worker?

Asked by Simone_De_Beauvoir (38980points) August 25th, 2011

First off, I do not consider sex work to be problematic if chosen freely by an individual even if I can account for societal patterns that disproprotionately lead women down this path so let that contradiction rest here.

Secondly, this question isn’t about what kind of a desperate condition you’d have to be in order to try sex work but rather about what kind of an environment/society you’d have to be in order for you to try this profession out.

I’ve considered sex work previously but the fact that it’s illegal has stopped me because I have children and don’t need to have a record even if I think it should be legal. If I can also guarantee test results for my clients, that’d be another condition that would make it easier, etc.

I have many friends who are sex workers and often think about what my sex work would look like and whether it would involve technology (internet webcams, private chats, etc.). If you were a sex worker, would you work face to face, on the phone, on the internet, as an escort, in strip clubs, in sex clubs?

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60 Answers

ANef_is_Enuf's avatar

Living in a society in which I felt that I could feel comfortable and confident in my own skin. I would definitely not work on the phone, but I’m not sure beyond that.

CWOTUS's avatar

Where do I apply? Any tips for résumé preparation?

I’m presuming that Equal Employment rules and other standard employment rules apply, and that age discrimination is not permitted.

King_Pariah's avatar

Not much according to some acquaintances. Apparently I’m already a manwhore… But as much as I enjoy sex, I think I’d have to be pretty desperate to resort to becoming a sex worker, it’s just not my thing as much of a “manwhore” I may be.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@King_Pariah But if it wasn’t looked down upon as something to do when desperate, would you consider it more?

Blackberry's avatar

If it was legal, I would try it out. There’s so much money to be made in this profession (well, for women mostly). Assuming there’s a market for women that have to pay for sex, I would do it if it wasn’t illegal. It seems too easy to be true as long as everyone is clean.


If I was single, jobless, and bored. :D

Aethelwine's avatar

I had the opportunity to make a lot of money as an escort when I was 18 and living in Las Vegas. I had no money and was living in a hotel. I considered it for a second, but that was all. I moved to my sister’s house in California and went to college instead.

It’s something I would not do. Not because it’s looked down upon, but because I consider sex to be something I share with a person I love. I wouldn’t be a sex worker when I was single and poor, I certainly wouldn’t do it now that I’m married to the love of my life.

rebbel's avatar

I would consider to be a gigolo I don’t like that word, but it probably gets the message across if:

- the girls and women that want to buy my time and services are healthy and not born before WWII.
– my body was able to perform multiple times a day.
– my insecurities were non-existent.
– I was convinced that there are girls and women that think I am cute/strong/fit/handsome enough to pay me for accompanying them.
– the money was good.
– my girlfriend was okay with it.

So, I don’t see it happen in the near future.

King_Pariah's avatar

Like I said sex work is just not my thing, I know it may sound hypocritical of me but putting monetary value on my nads just doesn’t sit with me very well, and besides, my manwhoring days are over/on a long hiatus. Also, I’ve found it’s almost certain that anyone i sleep with I develop some feelings for which alone probably ruin any sex career of mine.

everephebe's avatar

If I could phone it in sure thing.
I would escort in the right conditions.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

1. if it were legal
2. if I were single

I actually mentioned the possibility of working for a “phone sex” company to my husband and he shot me down, lol.

ucme's avatar

Right off the bat i’d have to be single, the wife would fucking kill me!
I’d have to insist on being choosy with my clientele, I ain’t humping no bag lady!
Finally i’m going to need at least 3 days a month “rest period”, not asking much.

Jude's avatar

Zero self-respect (personally).

TexasDude's avatar

A lot.

I can’t have sex with someone unless they care about me and I care about them. It’s just not in my makeup to do otherwise.

That said, the idea of doing porn has always sounded intriguing. My friends even gave me a porn name: Mike Torpedo and the Cock Ness Monster.

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

Not ever. Nothing to do with morality or illegality or judgment from society or emotional investment in the act.

I would not want to be in a submission relationship to the type of people I suspect frequent sex workers.

Jude's avatar

Let me just say, I don’t judge. Do whatever it is that you have to do. Personally, having been molested, I couldn’t go there.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@Imadethisupwithnoforethought Actually, there is no single ‘type of person’ that frequents sex workers. People of all races and classes do so.

Hibernate's avatar

Nothing. I had something I call a chance for this profession a few years ago but I declined.

I won’t go back to when I decided not to get involved.

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir I absolutely believe that is true. I imagine most days it would be somebody nice who was just lonely.

I also imagine that very sick people use sex workers to validate themselves. I just could not abide it.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@Imadethisupwithnoforethought Yes, there are psychos out there. People who aren’t sex workers deal with them all the time though. It’s called dating and I think you’re just as likely to find a psycho dating as when doing sex work.

MissAnthrope's avatar

First of all, I’d have to be hotter, more attractive, more fit, etc. I can’t even get laid as it is, much less have people pay me for it. Actually, I could probably get guys to sleep with me, but.. yeah.

Honestly, though, I think I’d have to be a much different person for it to work for me. One, I’m not into men and I don’t like them touching me, so that’s a huge obstacle. Two, much like when I considered being a professional masseuse, I realized that I am picky and I seriously do not want to have to touch people I find gross, which, given my luck, would probably end up being like 80% of my clientele.

So, basically, I’d want to pick and choose my clients, which maybe doesn’t work so well. I really just can’t have sex with people I’m not attracted to. I’ve tried that a few times and it’s totally not fun.

Now, other kinds of sex work, where the focus is not on actual intercourse, such as cam work, stripping, professional D/s, etc.. that’s much more my speed. But again, I’m picky, so it wouldn’t really work unless I could be choosy or if I had a very different personality. :P

gondwanalon's avatar

I would do one client for 1000 one ounce gold coins (>1.7 million US dollars).

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I don’t think I could do it. The internet or phone would bore me to tears. And I have to be into someone to want to have sex with them. $500 or $1000 isn’t enough to get me excited enough.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe I’ll give you $1001 cash right now…

bkcunningham's avatar

My role as a sex worker would be one of a paid activists/board member of SWOP-USA.

DominicX's avatar

The way I am now, I would never want to do it. It’s not its illegal status or its condemnation by society that’s preventing me from wanting to do it; there is just absolutely no part of me that is even remotely interested in being a sex worker. It doesn’t go with who I am or what I want to do.

Furthermore, my sex drive is not that high as it is and I think it would be difficult for me to have sex with a random person that I had no feelings for whatsoever.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@bkcunningham Yes, same here. I’m in touch with the local chapter, actually.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate You crack me up. I’ll do you for free.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

^^ LOL, I feel tho thpecial!

Your_Majesty's avatar

Motivation, that’s all I need. If I have the opportunity to work in such field I would prefer job ranging from sex cam, giving BJ, to actual sex, as long as they’re clean and STDs free.

I believe prostitution isn’t as ‘shallow’ as what many people believe, it’s just a job, like any other job, and it’s ridiculous to make it illegal.

MissAnthrope's avatar

After I posted, I remembered that I am probably going to be a porn star pretty soon. Does that count?

flutherother's avatar

“Sex worker” sounds very grim, but being a high class escort could be very glamorous I am sure though not for everyone.

MissAnthrope's avatar

Speaking of high class escorts, there’s an Australian Showtime fictional drama show called Satisfaction, which is pretty interesting to watch. I recommend it, if you’re interested in that sort of thing, of course.

flutherother's avatar

It sounds intriguing, I will give it a try.

Jude's avatar

@MissAnthrope, are you serious?

MissAnthrope's avatar

Yep. Not exactly traditional porn, but there is a local Mistress, very active in the scene, highly respected and with an excellent reputation, who does kink/fetish videos for her pay-to-view website. We’re in negotiation, have been talking off and on for a couple of months, and will get together to discuss this (and gel plans) once she returns from Burning Man. It promises to be super hot. She’s intelligent, quirky, creative, hot, experienced… and my drought will most likely be over. ;)

I’m very much looking forward to it. And, despite the fact that I’m super shy, I definitely have an exhibitionist streak.

Jude's avatar


pezz's avatar

I’d do it… well you’ve got to give these things a try haven’t you?

El_Cadejo's avatar

A world with out STDs

Jude's avatar

@MissA, would you continue doing what you’re doing if you had a partner? Seeing mistresses, I mean.

mazingerz88's avatar

Nothing much and I would give out coupons. : )

MilkyWay's avatar

If I don’t get myself a bed buddy soon. I’m so frikking horny!
Just kidding. It’d take a whole hell of a lot.

Pandora's avatar

Hmm, besides an extremely low self esteem and an extreme, extreme, need for cash, (I mean I am seconds from living in a gutter and all my family died along with my friends), I would have to say I would have to develop the ability not to laugh in losers faces.

JustJessica's avatar

The legality, clients, money,and anonymity, no risk, the proper planet alignment, a pimp. Screw it I wouldn’t do it.

cockswain's avatar

TL, DR, but I’m assuming someone already said lots of hot women and great pay.

Haleth's avatar

It would have to be legal and much safer, and there would have to be a good process for vetting the clients. (I mean, imagine meeting a prospective customer and wondering if they’re an undercover cop or worrying that they might hurt you.) I’d have to either be my own boss or work for someone that handled the payment fairly- like, they’re actually providing some sort of service that makes my job easier and more profitable, not just collecting money. Basically, it would have to be just like any other job.

From the answers above, it seems like men are a lot more open to the idea than women are…

ratboy's avatar

Just someone willing to pay me.

Berserker's avatar

Being a stripper or a gogo dancer are jobs I’ve often fancied. Now none of that is illegal, but to answer the question on at least one part, I’ve never went ahead with this because I don’t have much confidence lol. Those jobs also require some significant training, and I’m pretty much outta shape. I don’t think at this point, I could hack it. Plus I can’t dance (unless tapdancing is sexy haha) or move sensually worth shit. But you know, if I could.
As for the environment or society part, well I don’t got much else besides what I see now as fantasized motivation. I’ll bet it isn’t what I imagine it to be though. I got low self esteem anshit, so this whole idea here is probably just some means for me to deal with it in some way, at least as much as one enjoys a two second Autumn breeze pon’ their fayce. Maybe if there was a society that would compliment this, I would.

MissAnthrope's avatar

@Jude – I would, yeah.. My relationship with the Mistress to whom I’m in service is about as non-sexual as BDSM gets, at least so far. I’d liken us to friends-with-benefits, only instead of sex, she’s taking care of a very specific need I have (the beating, the domination, and recently starting some of the exhibitionism).

Now, the question is whether people I date would be cool with this. My relationship with Jen, she would have been perfectly fine with it. We talked about it, actually, my wanting to go see a Pro Domme, and she was very interested. She wanted to watch, in fact.

So, I don’t think it’s completely out of the question. I’m pretty much looking for kink-friendly girls to date anyway, in hopes that maybe I’ll have an all-in-one package, rather than a vanilla relationship AND a Mistress.

I am just not meeting anyone interested in dating me and I’m really over bashing my head against that particular wall, so it’s all good in the hood right now. Getting some needs taken care of, getting attention from smart, kind, and pretty ladies.. one of whom, I’m pretty sure, is going to want to take care of some other needs hrrmmm hrrrmmm.

thesparrow's avatar

I actually wouldn’t mind being an over-the-phone sex worker (so long as my identity would be concealed). I couldn’t deal with doing web cams or in person. I already write and read erotica, so I don’t see why being one of those ‘Quest’ girls would be a problem.

Heh.. Actually, I’ve got an even better idea. An anonymous erotic chatroom where you don’t even have to talk. Now there’s something I must think about..

Aspire's avatar

If I had the guts, and wasn’t scared about what I could catch, or the danger side, I would do it, if I were single. For the sex and the money.

thesparrow's avatar

I wouldn’t want a vagina that looks like the inside of an elephant’s ear, though.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@thesparrow Oh yeah? I’m sure you don’t look like a bag or ephemeral roses down there either.

thesparrow's avatar

Why the hostility?

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@thesparrow Oh it was playful, not hostile.

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