What do you find the most difficult and most rewarding part of being a single parent?

I think the hardest part for me is not having someone else to help out at home, either getting the child ready in the morning (you do this while I do that) or in the evening. It would be great to say “I’m going to take a shower, you give her breakfast,” or “can you give her a bath while I load the dishwasher?” Another example would be one parent drops the child off at school in the morning while the other parent may pick up after school, so one parent is free to go straight to work in the morning, and maybe one parent can stop at the store after work while the other parent picks up the child and watches her, or takes her to dinner.

I think the rewards are similar as other parents, just enjoying seeing her, playing with her, and loving her. Maybe one reward that dual parent families might not experience is not having to debate or argue about child rearing practices. I have friends that are couples, where one is lenient and one is strict, and it’s a source of friction. I don’t experience that, as it’s just me making decisions or disclipining.

I’m not sure I should be weighing here, as I did it on purpose. That said, the most difficult part for me was was the time KatawaGrey got run over (she’s fine now) and was in PICU for 4 days, and I really wished I’d had someone with me who felt the same, as her parent, as I did; someone who got it. Most rewarding? To sound as absolutely goopy as I can, looking at her now, at 22, and thinking “Wow! Look what I did!” OK, I know that she is who she is, but I like to think I had something to do with that!

And @jca , what you said about unilateral parenting, that was a great plus for me.

There are so many rewards that come from watching my kids do things and from just spending time with them. But it does get tiresome withe demands on my time.

I have physical custody but their mom has generous visitation. But I am the one that makes sure they are ready for school, gets my daughter to soccer practice and games, gets her to social events, etc.

I met a woman on line recently, but it is hard to even meet her for a cup of coffee, because of conflict with my kids’ schedules.

The most difficult thing for me when I was a single parent was the lack of a social life. I was a single parent for 5 years and during that time, I also went to nursing school (full time) and worked (full time). The time I had left over was for family (my son and the rest of my family).

The most rewarding part is looking back now and knowing that I can face just about anything that is put in front of me.

I am not (technically) a single parent anymore…as my child is now grown. But what I went through is not easily forgotten. Things I found most difficult:

Not having someone to discuss the choices I was making…not being able to just tell someone, “There’s a problem….how can we address that the best?”

When you were sad, there was no one to talk to and oftentimes, you had to sort of curb/mask the sadness and just soldier on.

Having to juggle work, playdates, and making sure you got to the school so that they were not the only child left in the parking lot!

Having to be both mom and dad…and cook, bottle washer, entertainer, teacher and chauffeur.

Dating….it was hard to date at times. And it was sometimes hard to date single fathers because I had to pass muster with their children (I remember one particular guy who had two teenagers who were really surly and angry at their dad——he did not have primary custody. I am guessing they did not appreciate having me around for one of their weekends with him. Of course, I had no idea that this was one of their weekends with him! Or I would have begged off, because I think time with children takes precedence over dating anyone.) And there are a lot of people who will not date single mothers or have strange preconceptions about that. I had a really cool child who was welcoming. You had to be a real piece of work if she didn’t like you…lol! And that was my barometer as it is for a lot of single parents.

Sacrifice? There is no sacrifice when you are raising children. What I mean is that a sacrifice means you give up something and if you willingly give up something, then it really isn’t a sacrifice. (My own take on that…not everyone’s.)

What kept me going was my spiritual life. And seeing that face every day.

That my daughter turned out to be just incredible. Hard-working, a well-educated scholar, a painter and a writer…but more than that…just one heck of a lovely young woman.

I couldn’t ask for more than that. It was worth every night without sleep trying to make planets out of balloons, going to school plays, making Halloween costumes (when you had to get up in three hours), baking cookies for the class party…all those things. Too many to mention. It was worth all that. I’d do it again. In a heartbeat. (I know you would, too…:)

I was a single mom for my son for his first 6 years—the most difficult part for me was dealing with my son’s biological dad spreading vicious rumors about me and people’s judgment of me as a young mom, but I got through it with a son that I’m proud of. The best part was him running to hug me.

I’m just now starting out, in the past 3 months, as a single mom again. School starts next week and that’s the part I dread the most, but knowing that my daughter’s stress level from the constant tension has dropped significantly is the best part.

Before I was married, I dated a single Mom who had a young boy. It was a tough relationship, especially because of the kid, who always saw me as a threat.

I remember I asked the woman if she found being a single parent onerous. She told me that one of the best things about being a single Mom was the very close “one-on-one” relationship she had with her boy. They bonded like glue to paper. I suppose that was good, but for me, not so much. It was hard for “me” to get close to “her”. Erg.