I invite you to write a sentence that has never been written before [details inside].
Asked by
rebbel (
35549
)
September 25th, 2011
Inspired by a sketch* of Stephen Fry, I ask you to come up with a sentence that has never, ever, in history, been constructed before.
*” Imagine a piano keyboard. Um, 88 keys, only 88, and yet, and yet, hundreds of new melodies, new tunes, new harmonies are being composed upon hundreds of different keyboards every day in Dorset alone. Now, our language, Tiger, our language. Hundreds of thousands of available words, frillions of legitimate new ideas… Hm? So that I can say the following sentence and be utterly sure that nobody has ever said it before in the history of human communication: “Hold the newsreader’s nose squarely, waiter, or friendly milk will countermand my trousers.” ”
Get it?
Write on!
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58 Answers
Does it have to make sense?
@Paul Nope. (see the example from Mr. Fry, above)
I woke up this morning and ate a prickly pear, and then I thought about what it would be like to fly on the back of a hippopatamus, even though I know that hippopatami do not have wings, but since I’m allowed to make up this sentence all on my own, I know that nobody else will have to suffer the consequences of @Kardamom’s actions, as they are directed only at me.
My grandmother sure looks sexy now that her skin has been peeled off, I wonder if she would go out on a date with me if I showed her my nifty reebok pumps.
When pusilanimous politicians pee on the people’s power, prompt participation is proposed to prevent purloinage!
The aliens spat on the president of the United States of Asia as he spread his wings and took flight on his way to the safety and warm climate of the North American Northern Territory.
There are damn few who can fart so violently, yet quietly, that a woman can think you slipped a quarter into the “magic fingers” device, yet I did, though the smell gave me away.
I was angry at my shotgun, so I loaded it with empty Coke cans, shoved the barrel into my guitar’s purely heterosexual book-storm, and pulled the trigger, which unintentionally killed my great-great-great-grandfather through the fabric of time, thus negating my own existence.
The Vice Presidency of Dan Quayle was remembered as the starting point of a new found respect in our nation’s leadership.
When my boss, Bob, was berated on Friday and frankly fired, all of Bob’s bobolinks said it was too freaking far from from Halloween for such a Bob-gobling.
The bill proposed by the U.S. Congress was met with resounding approval in the public, was signed into law by the President, and was a model for all future legislation.
Holland win the World Cup, what a proud day for the Dutch!!
When Mr. Boomy is mean to Popolo, little Sassle sneezes and then farts an ocean.
@all Great sentences there, folks!
@ucme That was almost said, yesterday, when Marianne Vos reached second place, for the fifth consecutive time, in the World Championship Cycling…...
Congratz on Cavendish’ victory!
The salty spectrum of bananas can only be measured by sultry, bespectacled, bandana wearing means.
@rebbel Yeah, the “manx missile” sure is the man for the big occasion.
Twilight, leaking darkness on the condemning puddle of Justine’s blood, became my new best friend.
The computer drank Thursday’s Thursday birthday song.
Wow, this McDonald’s burger tastes soo good, it can pass off as gourmet!
My masseuse is my dentist.
That’s the last time I let you kill me like that, just look at the mess you have made of the kitchen.
The President’s approval ratings are at all-time highs, and have been for his entire term. His re-election is assured. (That one was just a bonus.)
I present to you George W. Bush, the greatest president who has ever lived.
Do you think I would look more manly with butt implants?
When it’s purple this evening, all the red oranges shall pink on the green.
It turns out that the waiter had been following the ice cream for hours, circling around the intersection at breakneck speeds, until finally he received a call from Mrs. Renfroe.
Want all my money? XD
An ant went to the market to anty up some carpet he won over at Nantucket.
Don’t show me the money.
If I told you, I’d have to let you live.
Go back to sleep and don’t bother smelling the coffee.
The sour scent of cinnamon colored the vivid yellow air.
Subway “restaurants” smell like a loaf of bread took a shit – how would you descibe the unique aroma in Burger King?
Many years ago, a man attempted to invent “The Butt Muffler”. His invention was intended to quite body gas and leave the area with a fresh smell. His backer lost interest because the inventer could not find people who were willing wear his device for 7 days, as a test pattern for its future.
I saw the giraffe baking brownies while the tiger burnt his paw on the easy bake oven that was given to him as a retirement gift from the elephant wearing the 3 piece Armani business suit that be purchased in a black market alley when he was in Hong Kong on a business trip back in 1934, right after the Vietnam war.
Uh, @Symbeline – you just wrote to yourself – which is probably a unique sentence of sorts so congrats.
Two weeks after my prostate surgery I was having hot, wild, monkey sex with a woman I met on Fluther.
Behold, Jesus did perform oral sex with Peter. Twas a Saturday afternoon, around tea time.
I miss the poetic, well thought out questions of dpworkin.
@filmfann
How about aliterative? [ see above ] : D
Behold, Mohammed did allow himself to be buggered until his seven year old bride arrived. : P
Everyone agreed that CWOTUS had the best response.
I’ll cook if you’ll wash your genitals.
A plug hole is the best place to fry a bacon seed, except perhaps an Iraqi jail.
He stared vacantly at the gray door, not realizing that behind it, was an 800 pound, pissed off octupus.
@zensky Oh yeah, I did…well, I answered accordingly by accident, haha. Default, default, default!
@CaptainHarley When pusilanimous politicians pee on the people’s power, prompt participation is proposed to prevent purloinage!
Isn’t that a take on “When the going gets tough, the tough get going?”
While the peacock sipped rainbow beef soup for his lumbago, Aristotle asked Aldous if he was Huxley? And the Peacock believing himself in inquisition said “No thanks, Torquemada I’m not hungry, I just ate.”
Everyone on Fluther posted happy and agreeable thoughts all day long, and into the evening.
@GabrielsLamb Haha, no, I used those arrow things to point upward and say CWOTUS wins. But thanks!
These pinheads we can see, but those didgeridoos have an automatic mode.
I understand the yearning for a shaggy bison coat (tres chic!) but doesn’t blubber draw flies?
oh, damn! Someone else said that before.
WillWorkForChocolate stopped eating chocolate.
Please lick my harpsichord slowly, I just parked my Zonda Tricolore yesterday.
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