Social Question

wundayatta's avatar

Do you think hooking up is mostly a college kid activity or does it happen elsewhere just as much?

Asked by wundayatta (58525points) October 7th, 2011

I was at a presentation today by someone who studies the sexual behavior of college kids. She was talking about hook-up behavior. She seemed to think that the hook-up was primarily something that college kids do.

People who don’t or can’t go to college tend to get pregnant more quickly and don’t seem to have time for hook-ups. Older people (about 30) are married. I’m not sure what happens in the time between college graduation and marriage.

So what do you think? What is your experience? Do you or did you hook-up in college? What did you do, relationship-wise, between college and marriage? If you didn’t go to college, did you do any hooking-up? What is your definition of a hook-up?

What’s your perception of the general trends in society—working people, college kids, post-college population and older population—with respect to hook-ups? What about the retiree population?

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13 Answers

Londongirl's avatar

To be honest, I never like hook ups, I always prefer the old fashion way of dating for a bit then gradually hook ups and once sex involved it will mean entering a relationship direction.

Sadly, hooks up do exist outside college in whatever age groups.

Blackberry's avatar

I didn’t go to college, and I still hooked up. I joined the military and was in a new place and was going out when I had the money. Yes, it seems a lot of my high school friends that didn’t go to college had kids, or they started community college, but stopped going for whatever reason.

Hooking up isn’t solely for young or college kids, but it definitely is more likely with them. I have hooked up with older women that were divorced and free after years of oppression marriage, so it is understandable for them, but most older people are already set for the longhaul and have other things to worry about.

And @Londongirl, hookups aren’t sad.

JLeslie's avatar

I would say primarily it happens in college. Some in High School, and after college probably only among those who are having house parties of some sort on a fairly regular basis.

I think hook up is a little different than one night stand probably. Hook tends to be at a party and really easy to have sex where you are at by going to a bedroom or as everyone starts to crash and go to sleep, you make sure you are in the same location as the person you are going to hook up with.

In college I knew people who had multiple hook ups with the same person. Every time their roomates boyfriend came into town for the weekend he brought some friends, and they had regular girls they hooked up with, either the roommate or girls who came over for a drinking game on night over the weekend.

I would say being young and out on your own is the same when you are 18, if you didn’t go to college, or 22 after college. At these you ages people make friends at work and get together to hang out together, and there can be some hook up, but I think it is much less than college.

Sunny2's avatar

My experience with the retired population is: you hook up if you’re lucky. Most of us are not, is my impression.

Coloma's avatar

All of my “hook ups” were between the ages of 16 and 22, then I got married.
Sooo, in my experience yes, it’s usually the younger crowd, but, not always.

Aethelflaed's avatar

First, how are we defining hook-up? The first definition is right, it’s a hugely vague term. Second, who was the presenter?

It’s been my experience that older people (in this context, meaning older than 18–22) did not have hookups (whatever that is, which seems to be anything other than very structured dating with the goal of marriage in mind) in the past, but are beginning to much, much more.

janbb's avatar

@Aethelflaed To my mind from what my kids told me, hooking up is what we used to call a “one night stand.” They used to get hilarious when I talked about hooking up with a friend sometime.

Aethelflaed's avatar

@janbb Huh. I’ve heard it used to mean everything from hanging out as friends, to each date you go on (but don’t necessarily have sex), to short relationships, as well as one-night stands.

GabrielsLamb's avatar

Ha Ha… College… I didn’t go to college. I was signed out of school at 17 and worked. I had my first BF at 15 that lasted 2 years.

I was married when I just turned 18 to a man that was 12 years older than me. I met him at my oldest brothers funeral after he was murdered. I knew him for two weeks and he and I went to city hall and got married..* I won’t say the rest.

I was divorced in three years…. I “Hooked up” twice.Nothing major.

I met my oldest sons father @ 20 and I spent 8 years in absolute hell with a drug addict, and a drunk who was unpredicitble and rarely violent, but still was sometimes. after a few years of putting up with it, I joined him and I too became an addict, worse then he was, which is why he left me when he got sober and for another woman he had been cheating on me with probably on and off since we met?

I left him, moved, got completely clean and sober, after probably 4 straight years of being completely high out of my mind just to numb the pain and not feel what I had allowed to become of my life as the years ticked by, and was completely celibate for almost 5 more years too (no one) while I worked myself half to death working 10 hour days trying to raise his son by myself.

Then I met my youngest son’s father at about 33 (who was supposedly Mr. perfect and, (the one) I was with him for almost 8 years, and he did what I always knew he would do… Without notice, or issue.

He walked out on me and two kids left me for another woman, and after that,

is a horrid blur of trying to figure out how to date again, meeting deplorable horrible liars and deviants, trying to fom things solid being cheated on, lied to, abused, and basically one of them as ruined my life as his life’s mission.

Hooking up? That’s funny, I wish i had… I wasted too many years trying to be in useless relationships that I got absolutely nothing out of aside from my children that I am raising alone with little help from one, and no help from the other.

The ONE child support check I recieved in 18 years, I gave to my son, and the scum bag hired a lawyer to have the junction removed, and sued my son to get the monoey back. He is undeniably his biological son and he knows it.

The “good” thing is… I went back to school, I just graduated actually, with almost a perfect GPA with honors… But you know what. Nobody want’s you at my age… Not jobs, not decent guys, It’s just too damn late to get back everything I wasted. So the one accomplishment that I did achieve, all it has afforded me is a $20,000.00 piece of paper that I can’t pay for now because I don’t have a job. So…

I never had a damn chance, and I would like the past 22 + years of my life that I wasted on hoping on assholes and bastards that didn’t come through in any concievable way. Don’t do what I did.

I wish I had hooked up. Here college kids… Read my life and listen to this!

Hook up, run free, FINISH SCHOOL, live your lives, take care of yourselves, don’t wait on a man… and don’t let a lie destroy your life for love that isn’t worth it.

Londongirl's avatar

@GabrielsLamb I’m sorry to hear that… At least you are now free and in a better situation than with abusive guys…

GabrielsLamb's avatar

@Londongirl I wish that were true honey… But sadly it’s not. I’m still alone, but still victimized by an ex of mine which will probably never end?

Londongirl's avatar

@GabrielsLamb what kind of victimised by an ex? mind to share?

escapadesofapoet's avatar

It all depends on the person doing the hooking up. Its a simple as this. If you want to hook up with people then you WILL hook up with people no matter what your age or social status. Sure it happens a lot in University but that is just because there is a high density of people looking to hook up…that’s why it is common there. Go to a club and you can hook up because the is a high density of people looking to hook up.

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