I’m afraid you are being blinded by this boy’s physical attractiveness.
What we know: this boy is known at your school as being a player. Nice guys and nerdy/shy guys don’t get labeled as players. Players get labeled as players.
Your best friend already had her heart broken by this boy. So the boy is most likely a heartbreaker. But even if he broke up with your female friend because they just lacked anything in common, or he didn’t feel the same way about her, your female friend is still hurting. If you were to date him, now, that would be another cruel blow to her. It’s true that in life, unless you are breaking the law, you are free to do as you please and date whoever you want, but in reality, you need to learn what is socially acceptable within our bigger society (and within your smaller society of friends and classmates). Dating someone that has broken the heart of a good friend is a terrible idea. It will hurt your female friend and it will make you look like you don’t have a heart or have no sense in making a good choice about who to date.
You also said that one of your other female friends has a crush on this boy. That can only spell trouble and heartache for one or both of you ladies. It’s a horrible thing to compete with friends over a boy. One of you will lose. If you decide ahead of time never to date someone who breaks the heart of a friend, and never to go after someone when you will be competing with a friend, everyone’s heart will be better off.
You’ve said that you think he is sweet and nice, but what kind of a person insults you and makes fun of you? A mean, self centered person who doesn’t give a cr*p, that’s who. Do not try to brush off his little quips as “being cute” or “nobody understands him, he’s different.” This boy simply doesn’t care, because he doesn’t have to.
You’ve stated that he moves from girl to girl. That doesn’t make him romantic, that makes him a player. He doesn’t have to care about the girls he dates, because he knows there are a whole long line of other girls waiting to be with him. A guy like that is most likely very full of himself, and you will get dumped, eventually, just like all the other girls.
How would you feel, if you were in love with a boy and you dated him for a little while, then he dumped you and you were left heartbroken. Would you want your best friend to swoop in there and start fooling around with him? At that point, you would have not only lost the boy, you would lose your girlfriend too, because you would no longer be able to trust her to support you and care for you and treat you with respect and kindness.
It isn’t fun for anyone to have a longing for someone, with whom a real relationship is not very likely, but you owe it to yourself and to your friends to really think about what real friendship is all about, and what kind of a boy would truly make a good boyfriend (or just a good date or friend).
Looks are the least important thing, in the big picture of happiness. Unfortunately, looks are the first thing that you see when you look at a person. Do yourself a big favor now, while you are you are young and learn to look past the facade of the pretty face and get to know people for who they really are. There’s probably a couple of boys who are interested in you right now, but you can’t see them, because you’re too busy mooning over this one fellow.
Pick a smart, sensitive, interesting guy who isn’t being chased by half the female population of the school. You’ll thank yourself in the end. Be a good friend and don’t run in and try to hook up with someone who has already been with one of your friends. It’s just not nice and you’ll hurt your friend (plus you won’t be able to talk to her about the situation with out hurting her even more) and this guy is almost 99.9% likely to dump you, as soon as someone different/better comes along.
Composing members:
0
