Social Question

MilkyWay's avatar

Do guys not like holding hands in public?

Asked by MilkyWay (13730points) November 14th, 2011

In a conversation at school, one of my friends said that her boyfriend doesn’t like holding her hand in public. Another one of my friend said it was the same case with her. So I’m curious, is this the case with most guys? If so, why don’t they like it?
Personally, I think it’s the most wonderful thing ever.

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41 Answers

HungryGuy's avatar

I like holding hands in public.

But I like leading her by a leash attached to her collar even better :-p

Blackberry's avatar

I think it’s kind of juvenile, but not in a bad way. It just reminds me of being a teenager.

dabbler's avatar

It depends a lot on age. When you’re still young enough that a relationship is a strange new world and your own self-confidence is challenged by all sorts of things then holding hands in public might be uncomfortable. Folks in, like, high-school might be too young to have the confidence for public displays of affection, even as innocuous as holding hands.

When you get like into your young-adulthood age a guy whose confident about a relationship won’t be shy to hold his sweetie’s hand in public if he feels like it.

After 16 years of marriage I still like holding my wife’s hand in public, when I’m not being cranky.

bob_'s avatar

I like to.

Judi's avatar

We are old (50 and 61) but my hubby loves holding my hand in public. Sometimes I have to remind him we’re in public. Last Sunday in church I had to grab his hand off my boob and hold it. (His hand.)

marinelife's avatar

We still hold hands.

Zyx's avatar

I think the “public” part of the equation is far more important to women than it is to men. I don’t mean to say this goes for all men and women. I think men are interested in the “holding hands” part just as much as women, but where women seek to be part of a larger social equilibrium men seek to aquire status (the point of which is not having to care about an equilibrium). Yeah, I may have reasoned my way to exhibitionism (once again). (Maybe I need some sleep)

john65pennington's avatar

They are probably young and do not consider it a macho thing to do.

As time passes and they have the love of their life, they will hold their girls hand, even in bed.

This has never bothered me.

Earthgirl's avatar

My husband likes to hold my hand and he always has since we first met. At first I thought it was a little odd. I mean, I thought I had outgrown that phase, but I thought it was sweet. (I hear some guys going yuck! sweet??!) It was funny when we went to the zoo and there was a building that had nocturnal animals. It was very dark in there. He took my hand and we wandered through the exhibit like two teenage kids on their first date. ...wait a minute, it was our first date

SuperMouse's avatar

My husband and I hold hands in public all the time. I think it depends on the guy.

zenvelo's avatar

I’m in my mid fifties and like holding hands in public. My girlfriend doesn’t like holding hands at all.

AshLeigh's avatar

@Judi… That’s beyond hilarious. :)

tom_g's avatar

I don’t mind, although the height difference between my me and my wife makes a bit uncomfortable or awkward.

CWOTUS's avatar

Aside from physical attributes that all boys share in common (more or less), and the fact that they all breathe, eat and drink water, some of them like girls and some don’t, and the ones who like girls like them in different ways.

Don’t generalize.

perspicacious's avatar

Some mind and some do not.

ddude1116's avatar

I think it’s just a teenager thing. You know, the time when it’s purportedly bad to be “whipped” so they say.

filmfann's avatar

Since we began dating, my wife and I are always holding hands in public.
Married 27 years now. It might be partially because of that.

Aethelwine's avatar

My husband usually reaches for my hand before I reach for his.

blueiiznh's avatar

I actually enjoy it. The more touch points the better.
I guess to each there own.

EmptyNest's avatar

My guy holds my hand in public. I think only guys who are players mind it.

majorrich's avatar

I spent most of my life where Public Displays of Affection were not permitted. I am uncomfortable holding hands with anybody in public.

Joker94's avatar

I like it quite a bit. It’s one of the simpler comforts of being in a relationship, I think.

Paradox25's avatar

I’ve never been fond of public displays of affection (I’m a guy in my 30’s) for some reason personally whether it is holding hands, kissing, etc. I’m actually a very affectionate person, just not in public or in front of other people. I guess we are all different so I say to each their own.

beccagolling's avatar

My S/O and I have been dating for a little over three years now. And we still hold hands. :)

whitenoise's avatar

I think it depends on the culture of your environment.

Back home, in Holland boys would hold a girls hand w/o an issue. It is part of displaying your kindness. You’d also hold hands with your kids. Never with another boy though.

Here, where I live now – in the Middle East – boys hold other boys’ hands all the time. They stay away from holding a girl’s hand though.

So in short… If you want an answer to your question, you likely won’t find it on fluther. Look around you in real life and you’ll know, though.

Bellatrix's avatar

My guy holds my hand in public, in bed, while we watch TV. He has big, big hands and it feels lovely.

ucme's avatar

The only time I find it uncomfortable is when the wife spots me glancing at a passing pair of titties. Her hand squeezes mine like a bloody vice, causing actual tears to well up, as is her right I guess.

rts486's avatar

I’ve always like it.

blueiiznh's avatar

Maybe they don’t because they are trying to keep all their options open?

just sayin

Mariah's avatar

Where is “public,” specifically? Is it anywhere where there’s other people? Or maybe just at school?

I’ve only had one boyfriend, but he liked to hold hands in public. Thing is, I didn’t. Well, not at school anyway. Because I had always thought it was obnoxious when couples blocked the entire hallway by walking slowly while holding hands and I didn’t want to be “that girl.”

Meego's avatar

I like a guy to hold my hand. I think it depends on a few things, some ppl are not affectionate in public. Some just want to not feel like they are attached. Some ppl think it’s juvenile. It could be anything really.

EmptyNest's avatar

I don’t think it’s juvenile to show affection in public. I think juveniles should not show affection in public. We older folks have the right! ;-)

Berserker's avatar

I don’t know how much that applies to that many men, but my ex boyfriend didn’t like it. He did for a while, but not for too long, because his hand got all sweaty and his arm got all uncomfortable. Wussy. XD Well that’s what he told me when I asked why he always abruptly broke off the hand holding.

everephebe's avatar

Linking arms is better for ambulation.
Hand holding is more for when you are both ensconce.
How often are you ensconce in public?

MilkyWay's avatar

@everephebe Well,if you put it that way, I don’t often ensconce in public.
Linking arms is good too :)

AnonymousWoman's avatar

I don’t know about “most guys”, but there are guys who actually love PDA. That might include holding hands in public. It would be best for a person to be with someone who shares the same views on PDA as he or she does.

blueiiznh's avatar

<———PDA friendly and prefered.

wilma's avatar

I don’t like to hold hands in public, my husband does like to hold hands in public.

Ela's avatar

I love holding hands and hands in the butt pocket.

Bellatrix's avatar

I saw something quite different the other day. You know when you see women linking their arm through their partner’s arm? Well the man was linking his arm through is female partners arm. It took me a moment to realise what it was that looked different. Nothing wrong with it of course, just not something I have noticed (or perhaps even seen) before.

Meego's avatar

I wanna hold your hand..
And its sung by boys =•O

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