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mazingerz88's avatar

If you have ever allowed yourself to be manipulated, why and by whom?

Asked by mazingerz88 (19026points) November 20th, 2011

Was it for a good cause that you let yourself be used, even abused, maybe?

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8 Answers

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

It was for her love. And no, that wasn’t a good cause.

Coloma's avatar

I don’t think anyone truly “allows” themselves to be used or manipulated.
It’s a matter of education and identifying manipulative behaviors/traits in others.

I have let go of quite a few people in the last decade of my life as soon as I identified the games and personality traits for what they were.

The vast majority of manipulators are personality disordered by degree, especially narcissists, passive aggressives and those with sociopathic traits.

Once one is on to what to watch for in dealing with others and knows the “games” these types are infamous for, it gets easier and easier to spot the red flags before you’re in the trenches. I’m damn near an expert these days and a lifetime of experience has shown me what to watch for.

I’m a regular Bloodhound these days and can sniff out the most subtle scent of a weasel. lol

partyrock's avatar

It was by an ex boyfriend I really really loved. I let him hurt me, and abuse me, even though I knew it was wrong. I knew I deserved better, but I like him so much, and I didn’t want us to be apart. So I stayed for a while until it got really bad, and I got the courage to leave him.

whitenoise's avatar

If you allow someone to manipulate you, then it is not manipulation, but a game or seduction, or whatever you want to call it.

I understand your question though and… yes quite often I allow it. The reason I allow it, is to not hurt someone else unnecessary, or because the manipulation is benevolent.

Sometimes my kids try to manipulate me and my wife. We sometimes let them get away with it. It is part of life.

For instance: during dinner, one of my children may start talking about his day at school, how tiring it was and how he feels not so hungry because of that. We allow him to get away with that, even though we know it is a kind way of saying he doesn’t like the food.

One of their other food tricks is:
“Mum, the food was splendid, truly lovely, but I couldn’t eat one more bite.” (While we know it is something they don’t like, from the way they have been eating. They use this mostly when we have guests.)

lonelydragon's avatar

Yes, by a relative. I allowed it so as to avoid hurting others’ feelings.

Paradox25's avatar

Part 1 to your question I’ll answer yes. Part 2 to your question I’ll answer with saying that I was stupid and always tried to please others at one time. Part 3 to your question I’ll answer with “I’d rather not say”.

Berserker's avatar

Someone that was really charming and seemed so caring. That wasn’t really the case, eventually I figured that this person does this to have people worship them. Which kinda worked, but not for long, haha. Still, kind of a chapter in my life. XD At this point though, fuck em lol. Learned a lot of lessons though, as much about people as about myself.

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