Why is it more acceptable for girls to act like guys than for guys to act like girls?

The feminist movement has made it possible and more acceptable for females to assume traditionally male gender roles.

Males in western society have not had such a social movement, so we are still very much bound to what is socially expected of us.

Men are very circumscribed by their gender role. A lot of the pressure comes from men themselves.

I don’t understand it, either. If a man wants to wear a dress, or whatever, I’m not gonna stop him. xD

@AshLeigh Actually, I was thinking about this because one of my friends has to wear a dress on Friday and I told him I’d dress like a guy with him. But he said it isn’t as embarresing.

Because women becoming masculine is seen as a step up for them, while men becoming feminine is seen as a step back for them.

@Aethelflaed I think nailed it, but I was thinking along these lines:

Masculinity is perceived and conceptualized on a core level as “Strength” by the culture we exist in. To be weak is to fail to be masculine.

Feminitiy is perceived and conceptualized on a core level associated with “Nurturing” or “Beauty”. It is also associated with “Weakness”, but that is not the primary characteristic.

So to be female and strong, or to act masculine, does NOT indicate that the individual has failed at the role society has decided that the person fulfill based on their gender.

To be male and display feminine traits is an indication that the person is, in fact, failing to fulfill the role his gender is expected to play in society. Because “feminine”=“weakness”. At the very least, the person is suspect.

A women acting strong does not hugely upset the apple cart. A man acting weak is a failure.

We often choose to wear something that makes a statement about us. So it’s not surprising that when we dress out of the ordinary people think iwe are announcing ourselves.

When women first started wearing pants, the wearers were saying something about themselves. But over time the “message” became secondary to the function.

It’s hard for me to see the dress working in that way. It’s not as functional for men as pants were for women. So people seeing men in a dress infer that something special is being said.

Some men wear a dress to express their sexual identity. It should come as no surprise that when men wear dresses, onlookers suspect the wearer is saying something about his sexual identity. Of course when I wear a dress it means something completely different.

The liberal masculist movement addresses this because the feminist movement concentrates on the well being of women only. Conservative masculists only continue to regurgitate the same standards that caused men most of their own problems to begin with.

I would suggest googling Dr. Warren Farrell (one link is provided on my profile page). According to Dr. Farrell men are members of what he terms as the disposable gender. Note: Dr. Farrell answers your question better than I can.

@marinelife I don’t know why you bring up being circumscribed. Lots of guys are. ~

Because for some reason I can’t begin to fathom, the world values males more than females and therefore a man acting womanly is a total loser.

Great question. I totally agree with @rooeytoo. It’s a useless and harmful relic of humanity’s misogynistic past.

Anything that is associated with femininity, being feminine, being female, is viewed upon as a negative in this society. Being female or having the attributes of a woman is seen as a weakness (the weaker sex, so to speak, not to be taken seriously, ineffectual, etc.).

To have the attributes of a male is viewed upon as a positive——being strong, determined, assertive, result-driven, tough, etc.

So when a female acts like a guy, we tend to approve of that more than when a guy acts like a woman. A guy who acts like a girl/woman is seen as taking on the role of being weak. We even have derogatory phrases for it—- “Don’t be a sissy!”, “You throw like a girl!” or “He’s Mommy’s boy.”

Because of this attitude, I think a lot of girls and women don’t value the power of being feminine, and the qualities associated with femininity——being gentle, nurturing, graceful, etc. They “gotta be like a man” to be valued in this society. I think that’s a pity, because there’s a lot to be said, positively, of femininity and being feminine.

@MRSHINYSHOES I think you are speaking for yourself here, and are ill prepared to speak for “this society”. If I ere in that and you truly have research to prove that the entire society feels as you do, please provide links to the research that backs up this statement.

@ETpro I don’t need to have the “research.” Look at past history and the way society devalues women, depriving them of the right to vote, getting higher education, etc., because females were viewed as being too weak to make important decisions and were too unstable. That is the point I’m trying to make. And for you to say I’m speaking for myself here is pretty narrow in itself.

@MRSHINYSHOES ETpro begrudgingly admits you win. What I said is true, but your characterization of “this society” is equally true.

I’m really confused about people mean in this discussion when then talk about “anything that is associated with femininity.” Apart from appearance, what exactly does that mean?

There are lots of things I can think of that were once considered more belonging to the world of women than the world of men, that in our lives are no longer held so: child rearing, cooking, teaching. But I certainly don’t think of those pursuits as “feminine.”

What exactly are you thinking is feminine that doesn’t involve appearance (including apparel, makeup, and cosmetic surgery)?

@6rant6, I think that what people mean is the roles traditionally assumed by women such as mother, wife, nurse, secretary, teacher are
all looked at as “easier” to
perform, not mentally or
physically demanding. The
“gatherer,” or “weaker” sex if you will. Luckily that is changing

@GracieT So back to the original question, yes, being a wife or mother would look feminine and unmasculine to me. “Secretary” disappeared shortly after “gas station attendant.”

I don’t think nursing is viewed as easy. Television changed that.

And I think people recognize teaching as an equal opportunity profession. Although on this one, I would agree with you that people underestimate how difficult it is to do the job __well__.

So back to my question… what, other than appearance is regarded as feminine or “weak”? Are we down to “lifting heavy objects”? Is that the only masculine specialty? And last I checked, men who do that for a living aren’t respected or paid well.

A lot of this thread smacks of retreads of talk from the 60s and 70s. Things have changed. Often in the direction feminists sought. [Not __exactly__ what they want, of course. No one ever gets __exactly__ what they want.]

Seems to me rather than making sweeping generalizations like, “Anything that is associated with femininity, being feminine, being female, is viewed upon as a negative in this society. ” it is more enlightening and intellectually honest to talk about what is going on in our heads a individuals. Today, not 20 or 40 years ago.

@6rant6, I agree with you. Making sweeping generalizations is annoying and downright offensive. However, you cannot deny that a some of the hoi polloi feels that way, even though it may be unconsciously. I know that by stating this I am making a generalization, but despite how far we have come we are not completely there yet. I agree with you entirely. As a woman I have never felt stereotyped and I know that a most of the people I associate with do not feel that way, but the feeling is still out there. If you look you can find examples.