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Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

What book do you want to read about parenting and gender 'deviance' in children?

Asked by Simone_De_Beauvoir (38975points) February 28th, 2012

Say, I plan on writing a book (true story) once I write my dissertation and I know (for the most part) what I want to include in terms of transgender kids, kids raised in a gender-neutral manner and parents being trans or gender-variant themselves. Now, given that particular focus, what would you want the book to cover? Remember, this will not be an academic text (for the most part) – this will be a supposedly ‘popular with laypeople’ kind of book.

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8 Answers

fundevogel's avatar

I would be interested in the challenges faced and strategies employed in raising a child in opposition to the gender expectations the rest of society likes to impose on children.

I know that’s pretty basic, but it seems that society, or at least segments of society, actively oppose efforts to raise children outside of the typical gender markers and I’m curious about how parents try to do so without allowing their child to get swept up in the politics of their parenting.

HungryGuy's avatar

I don’t know enough about the subject to say what should, or shouldn’t, be in such a book.

Although I’m pretty open minded about people’s sexual preferences, identities, and orientations (although I know you think I’m a little backwards because I wouldn’t knowingly date a woman who is a genetic male, but that’s my preference, bleh). Live and let live.

But when it’s published, I’d love to read it. Please keep us posted…

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@fundevogel Well, isn’t all parenting the ‘politics of parenting’?
@HungryGuy Not for a couple of years just yet.

keobooks's avatar

Would you consider writing anything about intersex children? I was surprised to find out that 1% of the population is born intersexed, but almost all parents are strongly encouraged to label a gender as soon as possible on the child. Sometimes they get it “wrong.” Many times, the intersexed person grows up feeling like a distinct separate gender that is neither male or female.

I think it would be interesting to include it because intersex seems to be a shameful thing to be kept secret.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@keobooks I would rather write an entire book on policing of intersex bodies through a Foucauldian lens…I think inasmuch as some intersex children indicate “deviant” gender behavior or inasmuch as parents of intersex children simply treat them differently even if they claim they don’t, yes I will have to dig deeper into that.

fundevogel's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir “Well, isn’t all parenting the ‘politics of parenting’?”

Technically, yes, but it seems like parents and children that don’t fit the ‘norm’ draw a lot of fire from schools, neighbors, other parents, family and so on. It seems that that would make it harder for parents to raise children how they want with all the fuss other people make. Maybe I don’t know what I’m talking about. I certainly don’t have any first hand experience, but it seems like a common issue from the articles I’ve read. I guess the magnitude of it would vary according to the climate of where they lived and how noticeably different their child-rearing style was.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@fundevogel Yes, sure we draw fire. I contain it better than others because I can take those haters down quickly, through conversation and the kinds of shit they do to their kids that they don’t think they’re doing, that will affect their kids for life.

fundevogel's avatar

@Simone_De_Beauvoir I wouldn’t expect anything less from you :)

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