Have you ever had an event happen in your life that you can't stop thinking about?

My grandmother, who was the most wonderful, kind, giving person passed away almost five years ago. Sometimes I will wake up in the middle of the night and think I had a horrible, bad dream that she died, but she is really alive. I have to tell myself that she has passed. It makes me very sad, and I cry. It doesn’t happen all of the time, but several times a year. I guess I will never get over losing such a wonderful person in my life. I miss her still so very much.

Nihilism. At least once an hour I have a wave of ‘nothing matters’ pass through me.

Well for me almost every irregular event that happens throughout the day is something I remember. I really can remember the smallest moments in my life, but it can also curse me because I will also replay the events in my head to see how they went over and what the other person might have been thinking when I said what I said.

The time granny lost her towel.

that was haunting

Need details?

xxporkxsodaxx ~ im the same way, it really does suck. whats worse is that my mind often relates things to the most unrelatable things (such as oranges = people who sleep walk….........long story)

No way? like every time I hear oranges I think about people on acid thinking they’re oranges because it happened to my friends and I.

Uhmmm,~~~~~~~~~yeah, they are my kids!

I have many. So many that I really don’t want to begin going into telling them.

Not on a continuing basis.

If yours are bothering you, there are some things you can do to change them. First, make them conscious by writing them out. Don’t just say them, write them. The ask about each thought, objectively: Is this true? Is this helping me in my life?

Finally, create a positive statement the opposite of the thought. Each time the thought starts, stop it. Then consciously say the positive statement. It’s hard work, but you can change negative self talk.

If books help you, there are some on this topic.

Good luck.

My friend was recently found murdered, I know it has only been a short amount of time since this happened and is natural to think about it often. But I just have the feeling that I wont ever be able to stop thinking about it. I can make it easier to think about, for instance remember the good things about him, and not what happened to him. I miss him a lot and its hard not to think about it, but at the same time I know he wouldn’t want me to dwell on it.

@Trance24 That is such a difficult and horrible trauma. I am so sorry. That is a wound that only time can dull. (The pain of the loss of someone close never really goes away.) My hope for you is that eventually you can remember the good mostly and less on the stealing of his life in this brutal way.

my little cousin died a little over a year ago from an accidental drug overdose. he was 3 years younger than me. he lived next to me growing up. his mom is a raging alcoholic and his dad worked so much he was never around. me and him hung out everyday. he looked up to me alot. i started skateboarding so did he. we got in to rock music and went to concerts together. i started smoking pot when i was 13 and doing pills and other crap when i was 14. he was 11 when he started using drugs with me. i was older and had a car and sold him drugs when i was in high school. for a long time doing drugs was the norm for us. i moved away and didnt see him for a long time. i eventually moved back and i stayed away from him because i was trying to straighten my life out. he was trying to reach out to me for help or something after i came back. everybody said stay away from him hell bring you down. anyways he died april 14 2007. he was almost 22 with a year old son. i have and still feel a lot of guilt. he looked up to me. i knew what i was doing was wrong. people tell me me im not responsible but i cant help but feel somehow im accountable for something. if i knew then what i know now . he was pretty much my little brother and i feel like i had been a better example he might still be alive.

yeah. When I cheated on my girlfriend :(

I’d turned my back for one second just when my husband died in the hospital. I felt I had abandoned him when he most needed me. Thinking this was making me cry uncontrollably and I thought about it obsessively. I’d have done anything to make that moment as bearable as possible for him. I thought I should have known he was so
close to death. It seemed like our whole marriage had ended with me completely dropping the ball, failing to understand, tuning out, getting it all wrong.

A good friend listened to the story of his passing. She said, “Now wait a minute. He wanted to believe he was going to get well. In spite of all the evidence to the contrary, you let that be his reality and yours too. That is loyalty. It’s the opposite of abandonment. You gave him the right thing for him. He could count on you.”

Until this friend gave me her great compassion, I was really going nuts. I’m still incredibly sad, but I’m not nuts any more. My heart is in anguish for those of you who have written about being stuck in trauma. Someone must listen, and listen well. I want this for you.

@atr~ imagine how your girlfriend feels

@atr If you are still with her, and you aren’t still cheating, and you haven’t told her. Don’t. It’s your burden to bear.

Yeah and then if the girlfriend gets an STD or some shit, you should just pretend you have no idea WTF she’s talking about…..........................................................
That’s a great plan! Why should anyone have to deal with the consequences of their actions!?

no, I’m not with her anymore. She found out

I’m sorry you couldn’t work things out, did you at least learn a lesson from it?

Sometimes I can’t help but think about the time when I was about 12 and my cousin and I had anal sex! What does that mean?

….......I don’t even know what to say….......

I guess I learned to not cheat lol but vicseay, wow. You should keep that to yourself

Uhmmm….yes, keep that to yourself.

when a girl who I felt was litterally my soul mate moved away to California

The deaths of two of my brothers and my Father, and now that post by Vicseay ! TMI dude!!

adina1968 what happen if your life that made u post ur question. For me I’ve been cheated on by my ex of 10yrs relationship. My best friend’ from 8th grade passed away and Bunch of other stuff. Life sucked for awhile. Just accept that bad things do occur to good people. Allow urself time. Then do something totally new with a goal

Hey why can’t vicseay say this? What are you so scared of,
people? This stuff happens.

He can say if if he likes, but I can say I don’t like reading it. I’m not afraid of it. but I don’t have to like stumbling onto it either.